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  • #4523

    Glynis woke early but did not want to open her eyes. Last night’s conversation had gone on till late and was still heavy on her eyelids. She could hear the kettle whistling in the kitchen and small clinks and clatters of morning activity and some muffled conversation. Margoritt and Eleri were also up early.

    “They can’t do that!” Eleri was saying angrily when Glynis walked into the room. She shook a piece of paper accusingly in Glynis’s direction. “They say we’ve got a week to vacate the cottage before they begin the demolition. A week!” She crumpled the letter and flung it on the table.

    “I know,” said Glynis. “Margoritt showed me the letter last night.”

    “Morning, Glynis,” said Margoritt. “Pomegranate tea?”

    “Yes, thanks.” Glynis sat down opposite Eleri and picked up the letter. She smoothed it out, thoughtful.

    “Well?” Eleri persisted. “They can’t do this. Forcing Margoritt out of her home.”

    Margoritt placed a cup of steaming pomegranate tea in front of Glynis and sat down. Glynis noticed she had used the dainty floral tea set which was kept for “best”.

    “I had an idea in the night,” said Glynis. “It might be crazy but it might just buy us some time.”

    The others looked at her enquiringly. “We are all ears,” encouraged Eleri.

    “I used to make an invisibility potion which would render a person invisible for a time. I think it might be possible to make a stronger brew and cloak the whole cottage. I would need to adjust the spell and we would need huge quantities of the potion but I think it might just work. It might buy us some time till the others get back. They can’t pull down what they can’t find!”

    #4512
    Jib
    Participant

      When Lucinda called her friend, Shawn Paul felt it was time to go back home. He wasn’t sure if it was his natural shyness, that he had already seen and talk to so many new people today, or if it was the fear of the unknown. What would he tell a stranger? What would she think of him, his outfit and his scarf? All that made it too much at that moment to meet someone new. So he looked at his phone and pretexted something had come up. They agreed to meet at the reception at the French embassy and he left.

      Shawn Paul was walking crossing streets on autopilot, lost in his thoughts about the adventures of the day, when a crazy honking that sounded like an elephant fart brought him back to reality in front a bakery. He realised too late that he had forgotten his granola cookies on the table. But he shrugged and smiled when a little yellow butterfly flew by and landed momentarily on the rear light of a red car. He stopped and wondered how such a light creature could live in a city like this. It took off and fluttered around into the general direction of a public garden nearby where children played under the kind presence of their parents.

      It took Shawn Paul twenty minutes to go back home. He felt tired enough to take a nap before getting dressed to the Party. In the stairs he met with Maeve and her pekinese.

      “Hi.” They said at the same time with the same awkwardness. Maeve’s dog was sniffing out his shoes, making Shawn Paul self conscious of himself. He feared a moment she might think he had a sloppy hygiene.
      “Come Fabio.” Maeve said. “Sorry for that. Dogs…”

      Shawn Paul smiled in an attempt to hide his embarrassment, and each of them went in their own direction.

      :fleuron:

      Shawn Paul arrived late at the reception because he spent too much time deciding on which scarf would match his new deep purple velvet jacket. The others were already inside and drinking, their body moving more or less in rhythm with the music.

      “Your dress suits you so well,” said Shawn Paul bending closer to her hear and making an effort to talk louder. A smile blossomed on her face at the compliment, contrasting with a lingering nostalgia in her eyes. She was wearing one of those black body fit dress which gave her silhouette all the contours they needed to pop out in a flattering way.

      “You missed the speech of the ambassador,” she said with a wink. “Nothing memorable, it’s the same every year.”

      Jerk was standing on the side, wearing a suit like one would wear camouflage clothing. He seemed to deeply wonder what he was doing there. Shawn Paul, who was wondering the same, addressed the man a sympathising smile. A moment of connection happened and went away. Jerk took a sip of his glass of champagne and Lucinda put a flute in Shawn Paul’s hand.

      She took his other arm and said : “Come. There is something I want to show you!”

      #4494
      Jib
      Participant

        The entrance to the cellar was in the library, just behind a book shelf that had been pushed away. How convenient, Godfrey thought.
        Roberto has been busy,” he said, appreciating the new little wheels under the elm wood bookshelves. He tried it several times and saw that the wheels were perfectly oiled and made no sound.
        “Too oily,” said Finnley tutting disapprovingly at the stains on the wooden floor. She was already thinking of buying a new carpet, or maybe a new puppy that would help her dust the floor as it followed along. It would have to be small and energetic. Not too energetic though.
        Liz was fascinated by the door. It was an old door, carved certainly in oak wood and painted with oddly hypnotic patterns. She looked at the tonic glass she still had in her hands. “Did you put something in my tonic?” she asked. The glass pigheadedly refused to focus on the bottom of her eye.
        “I think it was empty,” said Godfrey. “Or at least it is now.” He took the glass from Liz and came back quickly, not wanting to miss the opening. He handed a pair of pink and shiny scissors to Liz who glanced at them and then at Godfrey with a puzzled look.

        “Do you expect me to cut your hair?” Liz asked him. “I think you should have your hair cut,” she added because it seemed to crawl and wave on his head. She looked at Finnley. “Yours too, dear, I’m afraid.”
        Finnley’s lips and eyes thinned as she tried her sharp face on Liz who cackled, and Finnley just shrugged and tutted again.

        “Well, use them to cut the red ribbon of course.” Godfrey nodded in the direction of the door and Liz saw that there was a fluffy red ribbon sagging between the side shelves and barring the entrance to the cellar. How come she hadn’t seen it before.

        She took the scissors and winced when the sound of the cutting resounded like nails on a blackboard, and for a moment she shuddered as the face of Sister Clarissa and her magnifying goggles popped out of the door. A horrendous sight, if you asked her. Liz had always suspected that their only use was to traumatise the students. She had forgotten she went to a catholic school.

        The door was finally opened, and Liz hoped what they found downstairs would not bring up more of those memories.

        #4472

        With a spring in her step that she had all but forgotten she possessed, Eleri set off on her trip to speak to her old friend Jolly about her husband Leroway’s latest plan that was causing some considerable controversy among the locals. Eleri planned to make the visit a short one, and to hasten back to Margoritt’s cottage in time for the departure of the expedition ~ because she surely wanted to be a part of that. But first, she had to see Jolly, and not just about Leroway. There was a sense of a stirring, or a quickening ~ it was hard to name precisely but there was a feeling of impending movement, that was wider than the expedition plans. Was Jolly feeling it, would she be considering it too? And if not, Eleri would bid her farewell, and make arrangements with her to send a caretaker down to her cottage. And what, she wondered, would happen about care taking the cottage if Jolly’s villagers were on the move again? Eleri frowned. How much did it matter? Perhaps a stranger would find it and choose to stay there, and make of it what they wished. But what about all her statues and ingredients? Eleri felt her steps falter on the old rocky road as her mind became crowded with all manner of things relating to the cottage, and her work.

        You don’t have to plan every little thing! she reminded herself sternly. None of that has to be decided now anyway! It’s wonderful day to be out walking, hark: the rustling in the undergrowth, and the distant moo and clang of a cow bell.

        The dreadful flu she’d had after the drenching had left her weakly despondent and not her usual self at all. But she’d heard the others talking while she’d been moping about and it was as if a little light had come on inside her.

        She still had trouble remembering all their names: ever since the flu, she had a sort of memory weakness and a peculiar inability to recall timelines correctly. Mr Minn (ah, she noted that she had not forgotten his name!) said not to worry, it was a well known side effect of that particular virus, and that as all time was simultaneous anyway, and all beings were essentially one, it hardly mattered. But Mr Minn, Eleri had replied, It makes it a devil of a job to write a story, to which he enigmatically replied, Not necessarily!

        Someone had asked, Who do we want to come on the expedition, or perhaps they said Who wants to come on the expedition, but Eleri had heard it as Who wants to be a person who wants to go on an expedition, or perhaps, what kind of person do the others want as an expedition companion. But whatever it was, it made Eleri stop and realize that she wasn’t even enjoying the morose despondent helpless feeling glump that she has turned into of late, and that it was only a feeling after all and if she couldn’t change that herself, then who the devil else was going to do it for her, and so she did, bit by bit. It might feel a bit fake at first, someone had said. And it did, somewhat, but it really wasn’t long before it felt quite natural, as it used to be. It was astonishing how quickly it worked, once she had put her mind to it. Less than a week of a determined intention to appreciate the simple things of the day. Such a simple recipe. One can only wonder in amazement at such a simple thing being forgotten so easily. But perhaps that was a side effect of some virus, caught long ago.

        Enjoying the feeling of warm sun on her face, interspersed with moments of cool thanks to passing clouds, Eleri noticed the wildflowers along the way, abundant thanks to all the rain and all flowering at once it seemed, instead of the more usual sequence and succession. Briefly she wondered is this was a side effect of the virus, and another manifestation of the continuity and timeline issues. Even the wildflowers had all come at once this year. She had not noticed all those yellow ones flowering at the same time as all those pink ones in previous years, but a splendid riot they were and a feast for the eyes.

        The puffy clouds drifting past across the sun were joining invisible hands together and forming a crowd, and it began to look like rain again. Eleri felt a little frown start to form and quickly changed it to a beaming smile, remembering the handy weightless impermeability shield that someone (who? Glynnis?) had given her for the trip. She would not catch another dose of the drenching memory flu again, not with the handy shield.

        The raindrops started spattering the path in front of her, spotting the dusty ground, and Eleri activated the device, and became quite entranced with the effects of the droplets hitting the shield and dispersing.

        #4462

        Night had fallen when Rukshan came back to the cottage. He was thinking that they could wait a little bit for the trip. He did not like that much the idea of trusting the safety of their group to a stranger, even if it was a friend of Lhamom. They were not in such a rush after all.

        Rukshan looked at their luxuriant newly grown pergola. Thanks to the boost potion Glynis had prepared, it had only took a week to reach its full size and they have been able to enjoy it since the start of the unusual hot spell. The creatures that had hatched from the colourful eggs Gorrash had brought with him were flowing around the branches creating a nice glowing concerto of lights, inside and out.

        It was amazing how everyone were combining their resources and skills to make this little community function. In the shadow of the pergola there was an empty pedestal that Fox had built and Eleri had decorated with nice grapes carvings. Gorrash was certainly on patrol with the owls. His friends had thought that a pedestal would be more comfortable and the pergola would keep Gorrash’s stone from the scorching heat of the sun. Also, he wouldn’t get covered in mud during the sudden heavy rains accompanying the hot spell.

        Seeing the beautiful pedestal and the carved little stairs he could use to climb up, Gorrash had tried to hide the tears in his eyes. He mumbled it was due to some desert dust not to appear emotional, but they all knew his hard shell harboured the softest heart.

        The dwarf had repaid them in an unexpected way. Every day just before sunrise, he would take a big plate in his hands and jumped on the pedestal before turning to stone. It allowed them to put grapes or other fruits that they could eat under the shadow of the of the pergola.

        Rukshan came into the house and he found Margoritt sitting at the dining table on which there was a small parchment roll. Her angry look was so unusual that Rukshan’s felt his chest tighten.

        “They sent me a bloody pigeon,” she said when she arrived. She took the roll and handed it to Rukshan. “The city council… Leroway… he accuses us of unauthorised expansion of the house, of unauthorised construction on communal ground, and of unlicensed trade of manufactured goods.” Margoritt’s face was twisted with pain as the said the words.

        Rukshan winced. Too much bad news were arriving at the same time. If there was a pattern, it seemed rather chaotic and harassing.

        “They threaten us to send a bailif if we don’t stop our illegal activities and if we don’t pay the extra taxes they reclaim,” she continued. “I’m speechless at the guile of that man.”

        Rukshan smiled, he wondered if Margoritt could ever be rendered speechless by anything except for bad flu. He uncoiled the roll and quickly skimmed through the long string of accusations. Many of them were unfair and, to his own opinion unjustified. Since when the forest belonged to Leroway’s city? It had always been sacred ground, and its own master.

        “I have no money,” said Margoritt. “It’s so unfair. I can’t fight with that man. I’m too old and tired.”

        “Don’t forget we are all in the same cottage, Margoritt. It’s not just you. Eventhough, they clearly want to evict us,” said Rukshan. “Even if we had enough money, they would not let us stay.” He showed her the small roll. “The list of accusations is so ludicrous that it’s clearly a ploy to get rid of us. First, that road they want to build through the forest, now evicting us from the ground.” And those bad omens from the mountain, he thought with a shiver.

        “We are not going to give them that satisfaction, are we?” asked Margoritt, pleading like a little girl. “We have to find something Rukshan,” she said. “You have to help me fight Leroway.”

        “Ahem,” said a rockous voice. Gorrash had returned from his patrol. “I know where to find money,” he added. “At leas, I think I know. I had another dream about my maker. It’s just bits and pieces, but I’m sure he hid some treasure in the mountains. There was that big blue diamond, glowing as brightly as a blue sun. And other things.”

        A big blue diamond? It sounds familiar. Rukshan thought. There was an old fae legend that mentioned a blue diamond but he couldn’t remember. Is it connected to the blue light Olliver mentioned earlier? He wondered.

        “That’s it! You have to go find this treasure,” said Margoritt.

        Rukshan sighed as he could feel the first symptoms of a headache. There was so much to think about, so much to do. He massaged his temples. The trip had suddenly become urgent, but they also had to leave someone behind to help Margoritt with the “Leroway problem”. And he winced as he wondered who was going to take care of that road business. It was clear to him that he couldn’t be everywhere at the same time. He would have to delegate.

        He thought of the telebats. Maybe he could teach the others how to use them so that he could keep in touch and manage everything at distance. He sighed again. Who would be subtle and sensitive enough to master the telebats in time?

        #4443

        Eleri’s recovery lasted much longer than anyone expected. Nobody really believed the old wives tale that getting soaked in the rain caused flu, but this is what appeared to have happened. She’d been out of action for such a long time that she was considerably confused about what exactly had been going on prior to her collapse. Someone ~ who? she couldn’t remember their names ~ suggested she needed one of Glynnis’s special tonic juices to revive and restore her. Perhaps even one of her extra strong turmeric latte’s. Weakly, and with a wobbly smile, Eleri agreed. She didn’t have the strength to argue about the turmeric. Not only that, she couldn’t remember why she would want to argue about the turmeric anyway.

        It is what it is, she told herself. She didn’t know what that meant really, but was too tired to think about it.

        #4404
        Jib
        Participant

          Liz left her bed at 8:30am, wearing only her pink and blue doubled cotton night gown, a perfect hair and her fluffy pink blue mules. She had been thinking about her characters while the sun was trying to rise with great difficulty. Liz couldn’t blame the Sun as temperatures had dropped dramatically since the beginning of winter and the air outside was really cold.

          When Liz was thinking about her writings and her characters, she usually felt hungry. Someone had told her once that the brain was a hungry organ and that you needed fuel to make it work properly. She didn’t have a sweet tooth, but she wouldn’t say no to some cheesy toast, any time of the day.

          She had heard some noise coming from the kitchen, certainly Finnley doing who knows what, although certainly not cleaning. It might be the association between thinking about her characters and the noise in the kitchen that triggered her sudden craving for a melted slice of cheese on top of a perfectly burnished toast. The idea sufficed to make her stomach growl.

          She chuckled as she thought of inventing a new genre, the toast opera. Or was it a cackle?

          As she was lost in her morning musings, her mules gave that muffled slippery sound on the floor that Finnley found so unladylike. Liz didn’t care, she even deliberately slowed her pace. The slippery sound took on another dimension, extended and stretched to the limit of what was bearable even for herself. Liz grinned, thinking about Finnley’s slight twitching right eye as she certainly was trying to keep her composure in the kitchen.

          Liz, all cheerful, was testing the differences between a chuckle and a cackle when she entered the kitchen. She was about to ask Finnley what she thought about it when she saw a small person in a yellow tunic and green pants, washing the dishes.

          Liz stopped right there, forgetting all about chuckles and cackles and even toasts.

          “Where is Finnley?” she asked, not wanting to appear the least surprised. The small person turned her head toward Liz, still managing to keep on washing the dishes. It was a girl, obviously from India.

          “Good morning, Ma’am. I’m Anna, the new maid only.”

          “The new… maid?”

          Liz suddenly felt panic crawling behind her perfectly still face. She didn’t want to think about the implications.

          “Why don’t you use the dishwasher?” she asked, proud that she could keep the control of her voice despite her hunger, her questions about chuckles and cackles, and…

          “The dirty dishes are very less, there is no need to use the dishwasher only.”

          Liz looked at her bobbing her head sideways as if the spring had been mounted the wrong way.

          “Are you alright?” asked Anna with a worried look.

          “Of course, dear. Make me a toast with a slice of cheese will you?”

          “How do I do that?”

          “Well you take the toaster and you put the slice of bread inside and pushed the lever down… Have you never prepared toasts before?”

          “No, but yes, but I need to know how you like it only. I want to make it perfect for your liking, otherwise you won’t be satisfied.” The maid suddenly looked lost and anxious.

          “Just do as you usually do,” said Liz. “Goddfrey?” she called, leaving the kitchen before the maid could ask anymore questions.

          Where was Goddfrey when she needed him to explain everything?

          “You need me?” asked a voice behind her. He had appeared from nowhere, as if he could walk through the walls or teleport. Anyway, she never thought she would be so relieved to see him.

          “What’s that in the kitchen?”

          “What’s what? Oh! You mean her. The new maid.”

          He knew! Liz felt a strange blend of frustration, despair and anger. She took mental note to remember it for her next chapter, and came back to her emotional turmoil. Was she the only one unaware of such a bit change in her home?

          “Well, she followed us when we were in India. We don’t know how, but she managed to find a place in one of your trunks. Finnley found her as she had the porter unpacked the load. It seems she wants to help.”

          #4403
          F LoveF Love
          Participant

            random plot generator

            A BOOK SHOP – IT IS THE AFTERNOON AFTER ALBIE HIT HIS MOTHER WITH A FEATHER.

            Newly unemployed ALBIE is arguing with his friend JENNY RAMSBOTTOM. ALBIE tries to hug JENNY but she shakes him off angrily.

            ALBIE
            Please Jenny, don’t leave me.

            JENNY
            I’m sorry Albie, but I’m looking for somebody a bit more brave. Somebody who faces his fears head on, instead of running away. You hit your mother with a feather! You could have just talked to her!

            ALBIE
            I am such a person!

            JENNY
            I’m sorry, Albie. I just don’t feel excited by this relationship anymore.

            JENNY leaves and ALBIE sits down, looking defeated.

            Moments later, gentle sweet shop owner MR MATT HUMBLE barges in looking flustered.

            ALBIE
            Goodness, Matt! Is everything okay?

            MATT
            I’m afraid not.

            ALBIE
            What is it? Don’t keep me in suspense…

            MATT
            It’s … a hooligan … I saw an evil hooligan frighten a bunch of elderly ladies!

            ALBIE
            Defenseless elderly ladies?

            MATT
            Yes, defenseless elderly ladies!

            ALBIE
            Bloomin’ heck, Matt! We’ve got to do something.

            MATT
            I agree, but I wouldn’t know where to start.

            ALBIE
            You can start by telling me where this happened.

            MATT
            I was…
            MATT fans himself and begins to wheeze.

            ALBIE
            Focus Matt, focus! Where did it happen?

            MATT
            The Library! That’s right – the Library!

            ALBIE springs up and begins to run.

            EXT. A ROADCONTINUOUS

            ALBIE rushes along the street, followed by MATT. They take a short cut through some back gardens, jumping fences along the way.

            INT. A LIBRARYSHORTLY AFTER

            ROGER BLUNDER a forgetful hooligan terrorises two elderly ladies.

            ALBIE, closely followed by MATT, rushes towards ROGER, but suddenly stops in his tracks.

            MATT
            What is is? What’s the matter?

            ALBIE
            That’s not just any old hooligan, that’s Roger Blunder!

            MATT
            Who’s Roger Blunder?

            ALBIE
            Who’s Roger Blunder? Who’s Roger Blunder? Only the most forgetful hooligan in the universe!

            MATT
            Blinkin’ knickers, Albie! We’re going to need some help if we’re going to stop the most forgetful hooligan in the universe!

            ALBIE
            You can say that again.

            MATT
            Blinkin’ knickers, Albie! We’re going to need some help if we’re going to stop the most forgetful hooligan in the universe!

            ALBIE
            I’m going to need candlesticks, lots of candlesticks.

            Roger turns and sees Albie and Matt. He grins an evil grin.

            ROGER
            Albie Jones, we meet again!

            MATT
            You’ve met?

            ALBIE
            Yes. It was a long, long time ago…

            EXT. A PARKBACK IN TIME

            A young ALBIE is sitting in a park listening to some trance music, when suddenly a dark shadow casts over him.

            He looks up and sees ROGER. He takes off his headphones.

            ROGER
            Would you like some wine gums?

            ALBIE’s eyes light up, but then he studies ROGER more closely, and looks uneasy.

            ALBIE
            I don’t know, you look kind of forgetful.

            ROGER
            Me? No. I’m not forgetful. I’m the least forgetful hooligan in the world.

            ALBIE
            Wait, you’re a hooligan?

            ALBIE runs away, screaming.

            INT. A LIBRARYPRESENT DAY

            ROGER
            You were a coward then, and you are a coward now.

            MATT
            (To ALBIE) You ran away?
            ALBIE
            (To MATT) I was a young child. What was I supposed to do?
            ALBIE turns to ROGER.

            ALBIE
            I may have run away from you then, but I won’t run away this time!
            ALBIE runs away.

            He turns back and shouts.

            ALBIE
            I mean, I am running away, but I’ll be back – with candlesticks.

            ROGER
            I’m not scared of you.

            ALBIE
            You should be.

            INT. A SWEET SHOPLATER THAT DAY

            ALBIE and MATT walk around searching for something.

            ALBIE
            I feel sure I left my candlesticks somewhere around here.

            MATT
            Are you sure? It does seem like an odd place to keep deadly candlesticks.

            ALBIE
            You know nothing Matt Humble.

            MATT
            We’ve been searching for ages. I really don’t think they’re here.

            Suddenly, ROGER appears, holding a pair of candlesticks.

            ROGER
            Looking for something?

            MATT
            Crikey, Albie, he’s got your candlesticks.

            ALBIE
            Tell me something I don’t already know!

            MATT
            The earth’s circumference at the equator is about 40,075 km.

            ALBIE
            I know that already!

            MATT
            I’m afraid of dust.

            ROGER
            (appalled) Dude!

            While ROGER is looking at MATT with disgust, ALBIE lunges forward and grabs his deadly candlesticks. He wields them, triumphantly.

            ALBIE
            Prepare to die, you forgetful aubergine!

            ROGER
            No please! All I did was frighten a bunch of elderly ladies!

            JENNY enters, unseen by any of the others.

            ALBIE
            I cannot tolerate that kind of behaviour! Those elderly ladies were defenceless! Well now they have a defender – and that’s me! Albie Jones defender of innocent elderly ladies.

            ROGER
            Don’t hurt me! Please!

            ALBIE
            Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t use these candlesticks on you right away!

            ROGER
            Because Albie, I am your father.

            ALBIE looks stunned for a few moments, but then collects himself.

            ALBIE
            No you’re not!

            ROGER
            Ah well, it had to be worth a try.

            ROGER tries to grab the candlesticks but ALBIE dodges out of the way.

            ALBIE
            Who’s the daddy now? Huh? Huh?

            Unexpectedly, ROGER slumps to the ground.

            MATT
            Did he just faint?

            ALBIE
            I think so. Well that’s disappointing. I was rather hoping for a more dramatic conclusion, involving my deadly candlesticks.

            ALBIE crouches over ROGER’s body.

            MATT
            Be careful, Albie. It could be a trick.

            ALBIE
            No, it’s not a trick. It appears that… It would seem… Roger Blunder is dead!

            ALBIE
            What?

            ALBIE
            Yes, it appears that I scared him to death.

            MATT claps his hands.

            MATT
            So your candlesticks did save the day, after all.

            JENNY steps forward.

            JENNY
            Is it true? Did you kill the forgetful hooligan?

            ALBIE
            Jenny how long have you been…?

            JENNY puts her arm around ALBIE.

            JENNY
            Long enough.

            ALBIE
            Then you saw it for yourself. I killed Roger Blunder.

            JENNY
            Then the elderly ladies are safe?

            ALBIE
            It does seem that way!

            A crowd of vulnerable elderly ladies enter, looking relived.

            JENNY
            You are their hero.

            The elderly ladies bow to ALBIE.

            ALBIE
            There is no need to bow to me. I seek no worship. The knowledge that Roger Blunder will never frighten elderly ladies ever again, is enough for me.

            JENNY
            You are humble as well as brave! And I think that makes up for hitting your mother with a feather. It does in my opinion!

            One of the elderly ladies passes ALBIE a healing ring

            JENNY
            I think they want you to have it, as a symbol of their gratitude.

            ALBIE
            I couldn’t possibly.
            Pause.

            ALBIE
            Well, if you insist. It could come in handy when I go to the Doline tomorrow. With my friend Matt. It is dangerous and only for brave people and a healing ring could come in handy.

            ALBIE takes the ring.

            ALBIE
            Thank you.
            The elderly ladies bow their heads once more, and leave.

            ALBIE turns to JENNY.

            ALBIE
            Does this mean you want me back?

            JENNY
            Oh, Albie, of course I want you back!
            ALBIE smiles for a few seconds, but then looks defiant.

            ALBIE
            Well you can’t have me.

            JENNY
            WHAT?

            ALBIE
            You had no faith in me. You had to see my scare a hooligan to death before you would believe in me. I don’t want a lover like that. And I am going to the Doline and I may not be back!

            JENNY
            But…

            ALBIE
            Please leave. I want to spend time with the one person who stayed with me through thick and thin – my best friend, Matt.

            MATT grins.

            JENNY
            But…

            MATT
            You heard the gentleman. Now be off with you. Skidaddle! Shoo!

            JENNY
            Albie?

            ALBIE
            I’m sorry Jenny, but I think you should skidaddle.
            JENNY leaves.

            MATT turns to ALBIE.

            MATT
            Did you mean that? You know … that I’m your best friend?

            ALBIE
            Of course you are!
            The two walk off arm in arm.

            Suddenly MATT stops.

            MATT
            When I said I’m afraid of dust, you know I was just trying to distract the hooligan don’t you?

            #4391
            TracyTracy
            Participant

              It had been a long time coming, but Lillianne had known there was no rush. There had been a flurry of interest many years ago, but nothing came to fruition. All the ingredients were there for a banquet of discovery, but no cooks to combine the ingredients successfully ~ until now.

              They’d been very careful to cover their tracks, even laying red herrings along the way. Others were interested, they knew that, and they knew they’d been followed, sensing the lurking energy trails behind them. But the main thing was, they got there first. Now was not a time to relax, despite the urge to just pause and revel in the accomplishment.

              “But I’m knackered, Lillianne,” whined Petra, running her hands distractedly through her tangled hair. “Surely we can take a little nap before we continue. Over there behind those rocks, look! Let’s just nip behind there.”

              Lillianne pursed her lips. There was no point in arguing with Petra when she was tired. And the more she thought about it, the more a short rest sounded enticing. The climb down into the dense wooded gorge had been arduous, and her ankle ached where she’d twisted it on a loose rock.

              “Come on then, but only half an hour!”

              #4381
              Jib
              Participant

                Liz’s smile melted away when Roberto entered the living room, he was covered in dust and spider webs. What flustered her most wasn’t the trail of dirt and insects the gardener was leaving behind him, but that he was not in India.

                Liz threw knives at Godfrey with her eyes, a useful skill she had developed during her (long) spare time, but he dodged them easily and they sank straight into the wall with a thud.
                Finnley rolled her eyes and ordered one of the guy from the TV crew to take the knives off the wall. “Don’t forget to repaint afterward”, she said with a satisfied smile.

                Godfrey leaned closer to the door. Liz felt words of frustration gather at her lips.

                “I think I slept too much long,” Roberto said with his charming latino accent. At that time, Liz could almost forgive him not to be in India. “Funny thing is I dreamt I was doing yoga in India, near Colombo.”

                Godfrey raised his eyebrows and gave Liz a meaningful look, telling he had been almost right all along. He relaxed and smirked. She hated it.

                “Well, that must be a clue”, Liz said with a look at the butler. “Godfrey, Roberto needs to be in India, and we need to go with him. Book the plane tickets.”

                “Well, technically, Colombo is in Sri Lanka, not India,” said Finnley.
                “Small detail,” countered Liz.

                “What do I do with the knives?” said the TV crew man.
                Liz looked at the knives, then at Godfrey.
                “I’ll take them back, they can always be useful where we are going.”

                “What about the interview?” asked the woman from the TV.
                “We’ll need a charter,” said Finnley who liked very much to give orders.

                #4328
                F LoveF Love
                Participant

                  All of a sudden, Godfrey flung the peanut butter jar he was holding to the ground where it smashed into dozens of glittering fragments.

                  “Silly me,” he said. “How clumsy! Clean that up will you, Finnley.”

                  Finnley glared at him, torn between annoyance at being treated as a mere cleaner and relief at having an excuse to leave the room and dispose of that darn sack, once and for all.

                  Common sense won. There is plenty of time to make him pay for that, she thought.

                  “Right you are, Sir,” she said, with an inadvertent roll of the eyes. “Right away, Sir.”

                  #4323
                  F LoveF Love
                  Participant

                    “Watch yourself, Godfrey,” hissed Finnley menacingly. “I’ve already cleared up one little nuisance from round this place.”

                    Godfrey paled and took back the peanut butter jar which earned him a perfunctory nod from Finnley.

                    “Don’t hiss, Finnley,” admonished Liz sharply. “Speak up so that the whole class can hear.” She tittered and fluttered her eyelashes at Walter, unfortunately accentuating her lack of sleep and bloodshot eyes in the process.

                    “Yes, what DID you say, young lady?” asked Inspector Melon. He prided himself on being able to deduce that something suspicious was going on and nothing, the considerable charms of Elizabeth Tattler notwistanding, was going to divert him from his duties.

                    #4309

                    The remembrance had made the magic book reappear in Rukshan’s bag, and with it, its leaves ripe with vibrant parts of the long ago story. Rukshan started to read, immediately engrossed by the story it told.

                    When the Heartswood was young, many thousands of years ago, during the Blissful Summer Age

                    WHO
                    — The Dark FAE
                    — The Mapster DWARF
                    — The Glade TROLL
                    — The Trickster DRYAD
                    — The Tricked GIRL
                    — The Laughing CRONE
                    — The Toothless DRAGON

                    ACT 1, SCENE 1 – THE PREPARATION

                    NARRATOR: It all started as an idea, small and unnoticeable, at first. Almost too frail to endure. But it soon found a fertile soil in the mind of seven improbable acolytes. It took roots and got nourishment from greed, envy, despair, sorrow, despondence, rebellion and other traits. And it grew. That growing idea bound them together, and in search of the way to obtain what it wanted, got them to work together to do an unthinkable thing. Rob the Heartswood of its treasure, the Crest Jewel of the Gods, the radiant Gem that was at its centre. It would be the end of their sorrow, the end of the Gods unfair power of all creation… The idea obscured all others, driving them to act.

                    FAE: Did you get the map?
                    DWARF: Of course, what do you think, I am no amateur. What do you bring to the table?
                    FAE: I bring the way out. But first things first, the map will get us there, but we still need a way in. What says your TROLL friend?
                    DWARF: He heard rumours, there is a DRYAD. Her tree is dying, she tried to petition the Gods, but to no avail. She will help.
                    FAE: Can your friend guarantee it?
                    DWARF: You have damn little trust. You will see, when she brings in the GIRL. She is the key to open the woods. Only an innocent heart can do it, so the DRYAD will trick her.
                    FAE: How? I want to know everything, I don’t like surprises. An unknowing acolyte is a threat to our little heist. What’s her story?
                    DWARF: I don’t know much. Something about a broken heart, a dead one, her lover maybe. The DRYAD told the GIRL she could bring her loved one back from the dead, in the holy woods.
                    FAE: I can work with that. So we are good then?
                    DWARF: You haven’t told me about your exit plan. What is it?
                    FAE: I can’t tell you, not now. We need the effect of surprise. Now go get the others, we will reconvene at the woods’ entrance, tomorrow night, at the darkest moon of the darkest day.

                    SCENE 2 – THE CURIOUS GODMOTHER

                    GIRL: Godmother, I need to go, you are not to worry.
                    CRONE (cackling): Let me come with you, the woods are not safe at this time of the year. The Stranger is surely out there to get you.
                    GIRL: No, no, Godmother, please stay, you cannot help me, you need to rest.

                    Rukshan looked at some of the blank pages, there were still missing patches

                    ACT 2 – SCENE 3 – THE HEIST

                    In the heart of the Heartswoods

                    TROLL: Let me break that crystal, so we can share it!
                    GIRL (reaching for it to protect it): No! I need it whole!
                    DRYAD (in suave tone): Let it go! I will protect it and give you what you want…
                    GIRL: Your promises are worthless! You lied to me!
                    CRONE: (cackles) Told you!
                    DWARF: Give it to me!
                    FAE (quieting everyone): Let’s be calm, friends. Everyone can get what they want.

                    GIRL (startled): Eek! A Guardian DRAGON! We are doomed!
                    FAE (reaching too late for the crystal): Oh no, it had broken in seven pieces. I will put them in this bag, each of us will get one piece after we leave. (to the DRAGON) Lead the way out of this burning circle!
                    DWARF (understanding): Oh, that was your exit strategy…
                    FAE (rolling eyes): Obvious-ly.

                    That was all that the book had to show at the time. Rukshan thought the writer got a little lazier with the writing as the story went, but it was good enough to understand more or less what had happened.

                    There was one last thing that was shown in the book.

                    WHAT THEY STOLE
                    — Shard of Infinite Knowledge
                    — Shard of Transmutation and Shapeshifting
                    — Shard of Ubiquity and Teleportation
                    — Shard of Infinite Influence and Telepathy
                    — Shard of Infinite Life and Death
                    — Shard of Grace and Miracles
                    — Shard of Infinite Strength

                    #4299

                    Glynnis, late with her mornings work after her lengthy dream journal entry, was initially irritated with the interruption of the postman.

                    “Leave it in the letter box!” she called. “I am up to my elbows in bread dough!”

                    “I can’t, it’s too heavy,” the postman replied, “And you have to sign for it, anyway. And I’m not taking it back to the post office, it’s put my back out carrying it here already,” he added.

                    Sighing and wiping her floury hands on her apron, Glynnis opened the door a few inches and extended her hand through the gap.

                    “You’ll need two hands, Ducky,” he said, thinking to himself, what an ungrateful wretch!

                    Exasperated, she flung the door open. The postman handed her a large stone parrot. A hand written note was attached to its neck with a blue ribbon.

                    “A Gift of Appreciation” was all it said, in a rather untidy almost indecipherable script.

                    “Oh, a gift,” said Glynnis softly, mollified. “But from who?”

                    “Says it’s from the Laughing Crone on the return address. Now just sign here Ducky, and I’ll be on my way.”

                    #4259

                    Eventually Eleri fell back to sleep, warmed by her memories. She was awakened by the sound of a flute and the sun streaming in the window. Realizing she had overslept and that it would now be impossible to slip away unseen at dawn, she lay there watching the dust particles dancing in the shaft of light. The motes swirled and jigged as if to the lilting tune and the temptation was strong to drift off into another reverie, but Eleri roused herself. Stretching, she inched the blankets back. The tile floor was chilly on her bare feet so she inched over to the sunlit square, pleasantly surprised to find her body felt rejuvenated somehow, supple and limber. She made a mental note to remember to appreciate that, while simultaneously mulling over the ensuing inevitable encounter with Leroway.

                    Maybe she had avoided him too long, and it was no longer necessary. It had become a habit, perhaps, to keep out of his way, automatic. She dressed quickly, for it was a chilly morning despite the sun, and slipped down the attic stairs in search of a hot drink. Hippy tea they used to call it, back in the days when everyone preferred coffee but felt that herbal teas were more beneficial, but coffee was hard to come by these days, and the various hippy teas were welcome enough.

                    Pausing before entering the kitchen, Eleri frowned. Surely that was Yorath’s voice? What was he doing here? They had parted ways the previous morning, Yorath heading for the city and then on to other places, his rucksack of elerium replaced with dried mushrooms. She had hugged him and thanked him, and set off up the hill towards the mountain village to see her friend, wondering when he would return.

                    Eleri remained standing behind the kitchen door, listening. Leroway and Yorath were deep in conversation. Her mouth was dry and she badly wanted to visit the outhouse, but she didn’t want to interrupt their flow. They were talking about the bamboo forest.

                    She continued to eavesdrop, wondering where the rambling and seemingly aimless discussion was going.

                    #4258

                    Tak holds the bamboo flute carefully against his chest. The clothes are two sizes too large for his natural appearance, but he did not dare change to human form.

                    He is looking through the window at the snow falling gently. He isn’t used to not smell the forest nearby, and seeing it through the window without its smell is utterly fascinating.

                    The old woman is always busy, writing on paper, weaving goat’s hair, cleaning vigorously and when she isn’t, she is busy talking to herself. He doesn’t mind the chatter, oftentimes gibbons are chatty too.

                    “Are you hungry? He’s going to be fine you know” the kind woman talks to him again. The goat nearby seems used to it, and is busy eating straws. “Let me see your flute, I will teach you how to play.”

                    He looks at her with an air of surprise.

                    “But for that you’ll have to take your human form.” She smiles warmly to him. He doesn’t know how she knows, but he knows she knows.

                    “I’ve seen many strange things at the edge of the Enchanted Forest’s heart, you see. That’s what I like here, you have to expect the unexpected.”

                    By breathing slowly, he’s able to regain his human child appearance and asks with a voice full of hesitation, handing over the precious instrument “Music?”

                    #4251

                    Gibbon stretched his long arm and touched Fox’s forehead. The hand was warm and soothing. Fox felt his heartbeat slow down, and as his thoughts dissolved into nothingness the rain gradually stopped. Soon there were spots of sunlight coming through the naked branches of the trees.

                    What did I tell you? asked Gibbon. His white beard shaking like the one of a Easter sage. He cupped his mouth like apes do and touched his chest where the heart was. Have you forgotten what I taught you?

                    Fox whined but said nothing. There was nothing to be said while his master was talking.

                    Go into your heart and quiet that nonsensical quest of yours. You know you need the human form to do that. When you’re in your fox form, your senses are easily fooled and caught by all the traps of Dam Sarah.

                    Fox knew very well the story of Dam Sarah, the Goddess of Illusion. He knew that in order to be free he had to use the form of a human, not only because they had duller senses, but also for other reasons that his fox self couldn’t very well comprehend. He had to be in his human form to make sense of all those gibbonish talks.

                    He focused on his breath, lulled by his master’s voice. It was like the whisper of the forest, whispering endlessly about ancient forgotten wisdom that only the soul could fathom. And soon the aromas of the nature around him seemed to fade away. Fox knew it was only because his sense of smell was changing closer to that of a human.

                    The only thing that could be an obstacle at first was the cold air. Fox really didn’t like being cold, and humans didn’t have much fur to protect them against it. But once the change had taken, the cold was helpful to anchor you into the present state of humanity. Fox caught it with all his heart to help him finish the transformation. It was strange to use the very trap that you wanted to flee.
                    He felt his spirit suddenly clear and empty as the bright blue sky above the forest. His previous wandering around, following the smells seemed quite silly. He had been influenced by that burning smell and got gradually caught into reverting back to his fox self for longer than he dared to admit to himself. His anxiety and constant wondering about it was the trap of Dam Sarah for the humans.

                    —Good, said Gibbon. But don’t forget that burning smell.
                    Gibbon had also took on the shape of a fully clothed human. Still his presence was unmistakably powerful and natural. He blew a warm breath on Fox’s puzzled face, which helped a lot with the shivers, and dropped some clothes at his pupil’s naked feet. Fox would have to ask his master how to bring your clothes into the transformation.
                    —Now, get dressed, Gibbon said. We don’t want you to catch cold. I have something to tell you.

                    Fox put on his clothes before the warmth of his master’s breath wore off. The familiarity of the fabric on his skin was another way to get deeper into the human form. The form is like a fishnet, keeping you tight into your reality. You can use it, or be used by it, he remembered now.

                    #4248

                    The small fire had died during the night. There wasn’t a lot of firewood in the forest, so he’d used all the dry leaves he could find. The child was quiet, and sleeping peacefully.
                    Waiting for the sun to rise, Rukshan was carving a piece of bamboo into a flute.

                    The night had been cold, and a lot of the smaller bamboos had turned yellow. He thought about the ginkgo trees in the town, guessing they would have left all their golden leaves to the ground by now, going into the winter sleep, falling silent for a little while.

                    He didn’t have a clear plan, but some twirling leaves on the ground seemed to invite him in another direction than he had planned. He gazed into the last of the fire’s smoke, and saw there was a small lodge he didn’t know about, close to the Dragon Heartwood. Something he didn’t expect. There was an old woman there, to whom he could entrust the care of the boy, while he would go to the mountains.

                    They would go there, another little detour, at the first crack of the pale sunlight above the bamboos’ tops.

                    #4219

                    As the crow flies, Glenville is about 100 miles from the Forest of Enchantment.

                    “What a pretty town!” tourists to the area would exclaim, delighted by the tree lined streets and quaint houses with thatched roofs and brightly painted exteriors. They didn’t see the dark underside which rippled just below the surface of this exuberant facade. If they stayed for more than a few days, sure enough, they would begin to sense it. “Time to move on, perhaps,” they would say uneasily, although unsure exactly why and often putting it down to their own restless natures.

                    Glynis Cotfield was born in one of these houses. Number 4 Leafy Lane. Number 4 had a thatched roof and was painted a vibrant shade of yellow. There were purple trims around each window and a flower box either side of the front door containing orange flowers which each spring escaped their confines to sprawl triumphantly down the side of the house.

                    Her father, Kevin Cotfield, was a bespectacled clerk who worked in an office at the local council. He was responsible for building permits and making sure people adhered to very strict requirements to ‘protect the special and unique character of Glenville’.

                    And her mother, Annelie … well, her mother was a witch. Annelie Cotfield came from a long line of witches and she had 3 siblings, all of whom practised the magical arts in some form or other.

                    Uncle Brettwick could make fire leap from any part of his body. Once, he told Glynis she could put her hand in the fire and it wouldn’t hurt her. Tentatively she did. To her amazement the fire was cold; it felt like the air on a frosty winter’s day. She knew he could also make the fire burning hot, if he wanted. Some people were a little scared of her Uncle Brettwick and there were occasions—such as when Lucy Dickwit told everyone at school they should spit at Glynis because she came from an ‘evil witch family’—when she used this to her advantage.

                    “Yes, and I will tell my Uncle to come and burn down your stinking house if you don’t shut your stinking stupid mouth!” she said menacingly, sticking her face close to Lucy’s face. “And give me your bracelet,” she added as an after thought. It had worked. She got her peace and she got the bracelet.

                    Aunt Janelle could move objects with her mind. She set up a stall in the local market and visitors to the town would give her money to watch their trinkets move. “Lay it on the table”, she would command them imperiously. “See, I place my hands very far from your coin. I do not touch it. See?” Glynis would giggle because Aunt Janelle put on a funny accent and wore lots of garish makeup and would glare ferociously at the tourists.

                    But Aunt Bethell was Glynis’s favourite—she made magic with stories. “I am the Mistress of Illusions,” she would tell people proudly. When Glynis was little, Aunt Bethell would create whole stories for her entertainment. When Glynis tried to touch the story characters, her hand would go right through them. And Aunt Bethell didn’t even have to be in the same room as Glynis to send her a special magical story. Glynis adored Aunt Bethell.

                    Her mother, Annelie, called herself a healer but others called her a witch. She concocted powerful healing potions using recipes from her ’Big Book of Spells’, a book which had belonged to Annelie’s mother and her mother before her. On the first page of the book, in spindly gold writing it said: ‘May we never forget our LOVE of Nature and the Wisdom of Ages’. When Glynis asked what the ‘Wisdom of Ages’ meant, her mother said it was a special knowing that came from the heart and from our connection with All That Is. She said Glynis had the Wisdom of Ages too and then she would ask Glynis to gather herbs from the garden for her potions. Glynis didn’t think she had any particular wisdom and wondered if it was a ploy on her mother’s part to get free labour. She obeyed grudgingly but drew the line at learning any spells. And on this matter her father sided with her. “Don’t fill her mind with all that hocus pocus stuff,” he would say grumpily.

                    Despite this, the house was never empty; people came from all over to buy her mother’s potions and often to have their fortunes told as well. Mostly while her father was at work.

                    Glynis’s best friend when she was growing up was Tomas. Tomas lived at number 6 Leafy Lane. They both knew instinctively they shared a special bond because Tomas’s father also practised magic. He was a sorcerer. Glynis was a bit scared of Tomas’s Dad who had a funny crooked walk and never spoke directly to her. “Tell your friend you must come home now, Tomas,” he would call over the fence.

                    Being the son of a sorcerer, Tomas would also be a sorcerer. “It is my birthright,” he told her seriously one day. Glynis was impressed and wondered if Tomas had the Wisdom of Ages but it seemed a bit rude to ask in case he didn’t.

                    When Tomas was 13, his father took him away to begin his sorcery apprenticeship. Sometimes he would be gone for days at a time. Tomas never talked about where he went or what he did there. But he started to change: always a quiet boy, he became increasingly dark and brooding.

                    Glynis felt uneasy around this new Tomas and his growing possessiveness towards her. When Paul Ackleworthy asked her to the School Ball, Tomas was so jealous he broke Paul’s leg. Of course, nobody other than Glynis guessed it was Tomas who caused Paul’s bike to suddenly wobble so that he fell in the way of a passing car.

                    “You could have fucking killed him!” she had shouted at Tomas.

                    Tomas just shrugged. This was when she started to be afraid of him.

                    One day he told her he was going for his final initiation into the ‘Sorcerer Fraternity’.

                    “I have to go away for quite some time; I am not sure how long, but I want you to wait for me, Glynis.”

                    “Wait for you?”

                    He looked at her intensely. “It is destined for us to be together and you must promise you will be here for me when I get back.”

                    Glynis searched for her childhood friend in his eyes but she could no longer find him there.

                    “Look, Tomas, I don’t know,” she stuttered, wary of him, unwilling to tell the truth. “Maybe we shouldn’t make any arrangements like this … after all you might be away for a long time. You might meet someone else even …. some hot Sorceress,” she added, trying not to sound hopeful.

                    Suddenly, Glynis found herself flying. A gust of wind from nowhere lifted her from her feet, spun her round and then held her suspended, as though trying to decide what to do next, before letting her go. She landed heavily at Tomas’s feet.

                    “Ow!” she said angrily.

                    “Promise me.”

                    “Okay! I promise!” she said.

                    Her mother’s face went white when Glynis told her what Tomas had done.

                    That evening there was a gathering of Uncle Brettwick and the Aunts. There was much heated discussion which would cease abruptly when Glynis or her father entered the room. “Alright, dearie?” one of the Aunts would say, smiling way too brightly. And over the following days and weeks there was a flurry of magical activity at 4 Leafy Lane, all accompanied by fervent and hushed whisperings.

                    Glynis knew they were trying to help her, and was grateful, but after the initial fear, she became defiant. “Who the hell did he think he was, anyway?” She left Glenville to study architecture at the prestigious College of Mugglebury. It was there she met Conway, who worked in the cafe where she stopped for coffee each morning on her way to class. They fell in love and moved in together, deciding that as soon as Glynis had graduated they would marry. It had been 4 years since she had last seen Tomas and he was now no more than a faint anxious fluttering in her chest.

                    It was a Friday when she got the news that Conway had driven in the path of an oncoming truck and was killed instantly. She knew it was Friday because she was in the supermarket buying supplies for a party that weekend to celebrate her exams being over when she got the call. And it was the same day Tomas turned up at her house.

                    And it was then she knew.

                    “You murderer!” she had screamed through her tears. “Kill me too, if you want to. I will never love you.”

                    “You’ve broken my heart,” he said. “And for that you must pay the price. If I can’t have you then I will make sure no-one else wants you either.”

                    “You don’t have a heart to break,” she whispered.

                    Dragon face,” Tomas hissed as he left.

                    Glynis returned to Glenville just long enough to tell her family she was leaving again. “No, she didn’t know where,” she said, her heart feeling like stone. Her mother and her Aunts cried and begged her to reconsider. Her Uncle smouldered in silent fury and let off little puffs of smoke from his ears which he could not contain. Her father was simply bewildered and wanted to know what was all the fuss about and for crying out loud why was she wearing a burka?

                    The day she left her mother gave her the ‘Book of Spells”. Glynis knew how precious this book was to her mother but could only think how heavy it would be to lug around with her on her journey.

                    “Remember, Glynis,” her mother said as she hugged Glynis tightly to her, “the sorcerers have powerful magic but it is a mere drop in the ocean in comparison to the magic of All That Is. You have that great power within you and no sorcerer can take take that from you. You have the power to transform this into something beautiful.”

                    #4192
                    TracyTracy
                    Participant

                      Bert:

                      I just shook my head and carried on digging the new bed for the broad beans. Wasn’t no point in trying to tell her, just let her grumble on. Never bloody satisfied unless they’ve got something to moan about. Women! And granny’s in particular, never satisfied. She wanted the place to herself, that’s what she always said, wanted a rest from all the commotion and noise. So what does she do when she has a nice bit of peace and quiet? Spends the whole bloody time wittering on about how quiet it is.

                      I’d have enjoyed the chance to get on with me gardening if I didn’t have to listen to Mater going on and on about how quiet it was. I said to her yesterday, “Aint so quiet ‘round here from my perspective, with you going on and on about how blasted quiet it is,” but she just snorted at me and carried on grumbling.

                      I haven’t told her Idle called to say she was on her way back home. Let her enjoy the sound of her own chuntering a bit longer.

                      Suddenly Bert saw the funny side. Perhaps it was the early morning sun turning the whitewashed walls gold that lightened his mood. Perhaps it was the birds twittering and fluttering from tree to tree. Perhaps it was the feeling of warmth as the slanting sun bathed his wrinkled brow. But he laughed out loud, for the sheer joy of it all.

                      “Daft old coot,” muttered Mater, who was watching him from the kitchen window. “What is there to laugh about? Silly old sod.” She turned away from the window with a derisory little sound, but a smile was hovering about her shriveled lips.

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