-
AuthorSearch Results
-
November 11, 2012 at 8:05 pm #2864
In reply to: Random RewrEights – The Del’Eights thread
Ann Aspect had started the evening course “Free the Fiction Writer Within” without much hope, but much to her surprise, she loved it. She enjoyed it so much that on impulse she quit her day job at the Frozen Flounder Company and signed up at the Fiction Writers Academy as a full time immature student.
March 15, 2012 at 11:36 am #127In reply to: Tales of Tw’Elves
On the marina, Sue Flay, wrapped in hot pink towel sprinkled in horseradish and buns crumbs started to feel dizzy and possessed.
Her poodle had bitten her savagely, and her right breast was bleeding profusely.“May I be of assistance?” an tonsured man with a genial face and white girded loins asked, handing her a raspy paper towel.
Without knowing why, Sue started to sob like a huge meringue.
March 14, 2012 at 11:32 pm #1297In reply to: Tales of Tw’Elves
Todd the poodle was in fact a shapeshifter in hiding, monitoring the spread of the Tourette virus the Sh’elves had unleashed upon the marinade.
Sadly he’d noticed the Elves had dispatched a covert squad of Hot Cross Bums, an old alliance of homeless monks, probably to uncover the source of the disease. He’d had to be extremely cautious.
But then, the mass of flesh surrounding his collar started to squeeze horribly.March 14, 2012 at 10:19 pm #1295In reply to: Tales of Tw’Elves
“Guess it was about bloody time I got back here” Franlise said, her feather duster firmly clutched in her left hand.
The matronly black woman started dusting vigourously, sending myriads of half-written papers flying in the air.
“My draaafts!” Elizabeth shriek was lost in the gusts of winds.“Bugger, bugger, bugger” the impromptu cleaning lady started to enunciate in a most perfect Queen’s English. “Nothing like some good buggery bugger to start the day and clear the lungs. And many a little makes a damn buggery mickle, isn’t that right darling?”. She said, striking a pilates pose in between the cleaning.
Elizabeth stood aghast, not knowing what to say but a meek “Didn’t I fire you?” to which Franlise knew better than to answer with nought but a smile.
Drawing a sharp letter opener from behind her back, she nimbly leaned toward Elizabeth, with all her white teeth glowing in the dark apartment where even the aspidistras had long gone dried up and wrinkled, their pots now no more than mere ashtrays.“Well, now, what shall we do about all that spider cobwebs you’ve got yourself wrapped in…”
March 11, 2012 at 4:26 pm #1842In reply to: Tales of Tw’Elves
The Godfrey2012 campaign started when story characters from all over the world got together to tell other story characters about the fate of the ones left on the shelf in unfinished books. Some wanted to pin the blame all on Godfrey, to make it easier to steal all his peanuts, but the story characters weren’t so daft, they knew that everyone is writing their own story, and what was so great about peanuts anyway.
February 29, 2012 at 11:18 pm #2092In reply to: Tales of Tw’Elves
“Now what? T-R-E-X ? To be serious?…” Eliza was patronizing again. “What’s a Trex, by all means? That’s not even in the dictionary, I’m sure!”
“As if you’d started to care” Flinella rolled her eyes, while at the same time managing to discreetly wink in passing at the little reptile whose tail was wrapped around her neck as though it were the latest fashion. “By the way, it spells T-Rex, you dimwit.”
“Well, good for you sweetie, it only scores a measly 21 points.” Eliza bit her lip ignoring the offending remark. Then hit by a sudden realisation, she stopped dead in her tracks, all thoughts of vexation lost in the current wave of thought.
“Wow, I’d never thought of that, but just imagine the size of those dinos’ fleas … Makes me shudder at the thought of it.”February 27, 2012 at 10:42 pm #2159In reply to: Tales of Tw’Elves
“Sorry, for the tardiness dear” the dragon coughed in a midget voice. Lowering its voice, he added “I’ve been busy honing my herding sheep skills.”
“Well,” Flinella said “at least you’ve came. I was starting to think you were crushed under piles of dirt or something. Things have been rocky of late on this island…”
She looked inquisitively at the familiar snout “and I suppose you’ve smoked those poor sheep, haven’t you? The S’elves won’t be pleased.”The dragon, actually a rather small dragon by all standards (the bane of his life was to be constantly mistaken for a karma chameleon), took the last remark in without retorting. That was ominous enough for Flinella who wasn’t accustomed to such absence of quick wit from his part.
The S’elves were a dissident faction of the Tw’elves. More ancient, some had said… though not as ancient as the Sh’elves —those went extinct or ascended a long while ago. Flinella was posted on the island to report on the shift progress and if possible, wreck havoc on any attempt at continent inuity.“So far, so good…” she smiled pleased at her progress.
February 21, 2012 at 3:53 pm #2750In reply to: Tales of Tw’Elves
Eliza took the lead with a whopping 111 points for the word fuckwit, and grinned impishly at Flinella. “Beat that!” she said. “I’m going for a swim”.
“Watch out for the dragon”
“Oh bugger off”
And then in unison, “what the fuck? What was that noise?”
“The horns of Gabriel” suggested the nun.
Flinella and Eliza spun round. “Where did she come from?” they whispered. “I thought we were alone on this island.” “Where’s the sound coming from, anyway?”
“It’s coming from Detroit” claimed the man in the plaid trousers. “The objective insertion of the shift just started.”
The two women clutched each others arms as they spun round again. “Where did he come from?”
“And where did he get those trousers!”
January 25, 2012 at 9:23 am #2746In reply to: Tales of Tw’Elves
“There hath he lain for ages, and will lie
Battening upon huge seaworms in his sleep,
Until the latter fire shall heat the deep;
Then once by man and angels to be seen,
In roaring he shall rise and on the surface die…..”After Petronella’s resounding success with the remote view and the head spinning afterwards as she pondered the possibilities, she spent a couple of hours randomly roaming around the internet, noticing how many synchronicities kept popping up.
“Come be part of the adventure, and help mold the destiny of the Multiverse in the greatest story that is being lived and not told. Come participate in Chapter One, the Revealing and discover the secrets that have been only guessed at till now.
The Isle has a plan for all…
Wounds Heal, Scars Fade and Paradigms Shift,
but GLORY is FOREVER!”Even the Rosehaven team were starting a new chapter.
“The Unbound, Cadamus the Artificer, entered Rosehaven. “
Cadamus? The name sounded familiar. Could it be Toobidoo, in disguise?
January 19, 2012 at 8:35 am #2756In reply to: Tales of Tw’Elves
It had been several days since the Sinstringia sank not far from Rome and Luigi’s niece Flinella was still missing. She had been on board the cruise ship, a last minute decision to take the trip. When the police had banged on the door of her apartment the previous week, she fled through the bedroom window. She started to run, and realized it was attracting attention, so she slowed her pace and projected the impression that blue and white night shirts were the latest fashion. The slower pace calmed her somewhat, until she realized that the latest fashion energy she was projecting was also attracting attention, so she pulled some plastic bags out of a rubbish container and projected bag lady energy instead, and became virtually invisible.
January 12, 2012 at 12:15 pm #2837In reply to: Tales of Tw’Elves
It should be noted that the new continents were not all, at the time this story commences, physically inserted ~ some were for the most part realized, some were in varying stages of manifestation, and some were still potential probabilities. The Iberian peninsula was in the process of cracking apart from mainland Europe (and in the process, revealing an extraordinary underground network containing the remains of an ancient civilization, now visible for the first time in millions of years), and Iceland had started to drift south, creating much speculation about a possible merger occuring somewhere in the region of the Bermuda Triangle.
July 15, 2011 at 9:10 am #104Topic: Sold! To The Man In Pistachio
in forum The Faded Cabbage TavernThe shift is going to go on for longer than I thought so it doesn’t need my undivided attention for the next 65 years. I might start a thread for discontinuous ramblings of any nature, by any nature and for any nature.
November 12, 2010 at 11:58 am #2488In reply to: The Eights’ Shift, Stories
While in the other Eightic Dimension, Lilac —catching a new weebit of inspiration— suddenly went off for a good old clue-hunt and some air-fishing of these whoohoo sparkling flying goldfishes (her morning cup of herbal coffree smelt like concrete today) — meanwhile, in the Peasland Dimension, the aliens had indeed departed. Not without leaving behind a sweet smell of peer compote that nobody knew for sure whether or not it should be considered slightly ominous.
As it should, the Saucerers who had been consulted on that matter had nothing better to do but further enhance the confusion. They all started to dread the arrival of a new species… Strawberries aliens.October 29, 2010 at 8:20 am #2739In reply to: Strings of Nines
Arona was starting to get cold in the pinkini. She wondered how the lady with the green hair managed to keep warm with so little (not to say as much as nothing) on her skin.
She probably had some fuel more lasting than just Nhum.
Upon seeing that (not the nakie lady, Flove forbid, but the freezing Arona and the night falling down), chivalrous Vinny and Bucky went to gather some bones and fire to spend the night around a nice bonefire. Just what she needed for a keetle of hot tea.Note from the observing Sue Maffey, who started quickly to get high and delirious on Nhum tea in chippendale cups and mumbled to herself and patient Minky-in-crutches in between a few hiccups: “you knew that a bonfire is actually a fire made of bones, originally said of fires in which the bones of slaughtered animals were burned, allegedly a Gaengelic tradition of the slaughter season in autumn (Samhain, which was soon to come).”
She almost gasped wondering where their camelephants had suddenly gone and why that purple reckless dragon suddenly looked satiated.By now, almost everyone else who was there, including (but not only) Mandrake, Yickesy, Winky-nakie-greenie-Messmeerah-with-her-carved-jamón and Mrs Janet had thought the same at least once. That and wondering whether they’d ever get to see that famed Jiborium.
So much for cheap package tours.October 27, 2010 at 11:06 pm #2482In reply to: The Eights’ Shift, Stories
Interestingly enough (or oddly enough one would say), in such reality, the bodies alone were reproducing while the heads had to constantly find out new bodies to cling to — when they felt the desire for movement, that is.
At least, that’s what the Forehead was thinking while shaving — as it did not have enough appendages to be able to meditate while defecating, which was by far, it was told, the best method of enlightenment known to Peasmen and other sensible beings.
Anyway, how odder can it be, it thought again. It may well be time to shift all of this a bit — why would each head need such a renewal of bodies and thus incarnations (or more properly, “embodiments”) without itself changing. Funnily enough, the alien bodies had in fact no need for heads. They actually had more than one: one for each of the sensory tendrils coming out of their shoulders. And according to them, Peasland bodies could very well start their ®evolution just now.October 27, 2010 at 8:41 am #2737In reply to: Strings of Nines
Arona was starting to wonder if Vincentius had been taken over by his evil twin brother – Demitrius. She decided to keep her suspicions to herself, at least for now.
“Silly me,” she said with a small smile. Or with just a slight stretch of the imagination it could have been a smirk.
October 26, 2010 at 11:07 pm #2479In reply to: The Eights’ Shift, Stories
Eggwoot, rather bored by the meeting of the heads, rolled outside to enjoy a sneaky peagarette. He was startled to see a group of alien bodies in the distance making strange contortions.
“Are they dancing?” he wondered, intrigued.
October 25, 2010 at 11:51 pm #2476In reply to: The Eights’ Shift, Stories
There, at the special bodies event, a big spiritism session was organised.
Through one of the old bodies of wisdom, came forth the great Forehead of Mazelduk, eager to converse with the lowly bodies and impart its knowledge of the great things bodies couldn’t fathom.
Such thing was, for instance, that bodies of sweet Peasland did not need to wait for the coming of the alien bodies (the alien bodies would be easily recognizable, as they were shaped as pears). Peasland bodies could very much so start to contact them, on their own —and even better, with a bit of luck, hope for successfully abducting some of them.
Such was the grand wisdom of the Forehead.October 21, 2010 at 11:03 pm #2474In reply to: The Eights’ Shift, Stories
The heads started to congregate from all corners of the Peasuniverse for the upcoming event.
October 1, 2010 at 8:16 am #2710In reply to: Strings of Nines
Of course, it wasn’t Mandrake, but a stray snakipooh, lured by the magical properties of Aronipooh’s feet that had started to lick her toes while Mandrake was away chewing on his pride. Arona had a split moment of pleasurable intensity before she came quickly to her senses to realize Mandrake wouldn’t do such an odd thing.
Arona wondered if the snakipooh would make a nice boa round her lovely shoulders, but then thought it would be a tad too daring and quite unecessary given her natural allure. She quickly shooed it away, searching in her magical bag, among the sabulmantium and her other belongings, for a bottle of Nhum.
-
AuthorSearch Results
Search Results for 'start'
-
Search Results
-
The shift is going to go on for longer than I thought so it doesn’t need my undivided attention for the next 65 years. I might start a thread for discontinuous ramblings of any nature, by any nature and for any nature.