Daily Random Quote

  • “Right, that does it! I’m moving the whole family back to the right story!” said Aunt Idle, invigorated and emboldened with the sweet energy of the honey. “Bloody cackling nonsense!” ... · ID #3961 (continued)
    (next in 18h 00min…)

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  • #4502
    Jib
    Participant

      Shawn-Paul exited Finn’s Bakery on the crowded Cobble street with his precious cargo of granola cookies. They were wrapped in a cute purple box pommeled with pink hearts. He put on a disdainful attitude, adjusting his scarf for better effect, while already salivating in anticipation of the granola melting in his hot chocolate at home. He was sure that would revive his fleeting inspiration for his novel.
      It was hard not to swallow as saliva accumulated in his mouth, but he had had years of practices since he was eight. His aunt Begonia had just given him a snicker bar that he had swallowed in one gulp, spreading some chocolate on his face in the process. She had accused him of being a dirty little piglet and he was so upset of being compared to the animal, that he had vowed to never show his love for food again. Instead he developed a public dislike of food and a slender frame quite fitting his bohemian lifestyle, while always having some cookies in store.

      Shawn-Paul turned right on Quagmire street. It was bordered with Plane trees that kept it cool and bearable in summer. He was thinking about the suggestion of his writing coach to spend some time with his artist self, thinking that he had not done it for quite some time, but immediately felt guilty about not writing and firmed his resolution to go back home and write. He walked past a group of two elder woman and a man arguing in front of Liz’s Antique. One of the woman had a caved in mouth and used her hands profusely to make her point to the man. She was wearing pink slippers with pompon.

      Italian tourists, Shawn-Paul thought rolling his eyes.

      He swallowed and almost choked on his saliva when he glimpsed an improbable reflection on the Antique’s window. A woman, smiling and waving at him from a branch of a plane tree behind him, balancing her legs. He particularly noticed her feet and the red sandals, the rest of the body was a blur.

      As Shawn-Paul turned, the toothless Italian tourist whirled her arms about like an inflated tubewoman, frightening a nearby sparrow. The bird took off and followed a curve around Shawn-Paul. Caught together in a twirl worthy of the best dervishes, the man and the bird connected in one of those perfect moment that Shawn-Paul would long but fail to transcribe into words afterwards.

      There was no woman in the tree. A male dog stopped to mark his territory. A bit disappointed and confused, Shawn-Paul felt the need to talk.

      “Did you see her?” he asked the Italian tourists. They stopped arguing and looked at him suspiciously for a moment. “She was right there with her red sandals,” he said showing the branch where he was sure she had sat. “I saw her in the window,” he felt compelled to add, not sure if they understood him.

      The other tourist woman, who had all her teeth, rolled her eyes and pointed behind him.

      “There’s a woman in red right over there!” she said with a chanting accent.

      Shawn-Paul turned and just had the time to glimpse a woman dressed all in red, skirt, vest, hat and sandals before she disappeared at the corner of Fortune street.

      Moved by a sudden impulse and forgetting all about his writing, he thanked the tourist and ran after the red woman.

      #4492
      ÉricÉric
      Keymaster

        When Jerk came for his shift at the WholeDay*Mart, it was still early in the morning. He liked this shift best. Early customers were always a bit sleepy, except for a few of the early riser soccer moms up for a jog, and usually were far less chatty than the midday crowds.

        One had to find ways to keep awake though. What he liked best were the invisible people. There was one in particular who’d caught his attention for the past few days. She had the insolent smile of people in the know, piercing eyes that would go straight to you without care for the social barriers, or untold rules and rites of the place. In short, she’d struck him as the only awake person in the lot, almost winkfully so.
        And to his surprise, nobody seemed aware of that. It was as though she was in the background of the other drone people, who just couldn’t register such oddity into their daily computation.

        He suspected for a while that she had found some way to trick the self-checkout line, as her whole demeanour looked more bag lady than suburban heiress, and her cart always seemed well stocked.

        He couldn’t care less — after all, for a meager pay, he wasn’t there to police. He was just intrigued by how she would seem to get away with it and be totally unnoticed.

        #4483

        Thankfully, there had been a little left of the potion that Tak had so voraciously eaten.

        Rukshan had almost aborted the trip to the desert to take care of the little shapeshifting gibbon urchin, whose new shade of green looked serious enough.

        As quiet as she used to be, Glynis had shown a lot of cool and dexterity in handling the suspicious food poisoning case. She was gentle with the little boy, and didn’t show much concern about his going through her stuff.

        In the end, she said she would be able to manage curing him, but that it would take probably a moon’s time.
        Seeing Rukshan’s longer than usual face about the delay, she was the one to push him to go to the desert mysterious blue beams.

        “Go with Olliver, he will teleport you both, and you can be back faster. Once you’ll be clear of what it is, we can plan something. It seems rather obvious nobody’s really ready to leave.” She glanced wryly at Eleri who was munching noisily on her goat milk’s oats.

        Rukshan smiled. She’d almost sounded as though she was the boss. In any case, Glynis was right. Despite the cottage becoming overcrowded, and the threat of nearby building work encroachments into the forest paradise, all the unexpected friends seemed not in a rush for a change of scenery. Fox, Gorrash, Eleri and Hasam’, Margorrit and Tak, and the occasional resupply visits from the village…

        “I think you’re right.” He picked up his bag and nodded at Olli. “Let us go and investigate this desert beam. Are you ready?”

        And in a flash of the golden egg device, gone they were.

        #4471

        Fox sat back on the wooden chair in Margoritt’s kitchen, and crossed his arms, a little unnerved by the heat and his growing desire to go out in the woods and let go of all restraints. He had been struggling daily to control it and he had noticed it was particularly difficult during the new moon.

        “If we have to do it in the house,” said Fox, “Can’t we at least open the windows? It’ll let in some fresh air.” He wrinkled his nose at the heavy scents of sweat mingled with that of fermented goat milk, irritating his delicate sense of smell. Rukshan had gathered their little group and they were waiting for Gorrash to wake up.

        “The purpose of meeting here is that nobody can hear what we are saying,” said Rukshan with a hint of exasperation in his tone. “If we open the windows it’ll just…”

        “Isn’t it rather because of the mosquitos?” started Fox feeling a little argumentative.

        Glynis cleared her throat and got up, mumbling that she might have a solution. She came back a few moment later carrying a big bottle with a big sticker. Rukshan and Mr Minn helped her lift it while Eleri and Margoritt cleared a space on the table where they put the bottle.

        The sticker had something written on it : AIR CONDITIONED, winter quality. Handle with caution.

        Glynis turned the cap a few turns and a wooshing sound escaped from the neck of the bottle, followed by a gentle and continuous breeze of fresh air which provoked a murmur of appreciation from everyone.

        “What’s this?” asked Gorrash who had just woken up.

        “It’s what the sticker says. Cooling the atmosphere is just one way to use it. One has to be careful not to turn the wheel too much though or you could get frost bite.”

        The fae looked at the bottle appreciatively, impressed at Glynis’ many talents. He was already thinking about a few other ways to put this frozen air bottle to use when Glynis cleared her throat again.

        “It’s not infinite content and I only get a few of them, so if we could start the meeting.”

        “Of course. I’ve received words from Lhamom. Her father has passed away and they are sending him to the sea during the week-end.” He allowed a moment of silence, sending a silent prayer toward their dear friend. Then he continued : “That means she’ll be able to join us for our trip in the mountains. We only have to decide who’s going and who’s staying to help Margoritt.”

        Rukshan looked at each of them intently and Fox felt uneasy when his friend’s eyes fall upon him.

        #4461

        Rukshan went into the forest and looked carefully for a particular creature. It was almost nightfall and there should be some of them already out on the branches. The air was cooler in the evening, thanks also to the big trees protecting them from the scorching sun, and Rukshan couldn’t help but think that the climate was really going haywire. One day cold, one week hot and wet. And this bad omen feeling that everybody seemed to get recently. He knew it was time to go, and despite the comfort of Margoritt’s cottage, he was starting to feel restless.

        He was making a lost of noise, stepping on every dry twigs he could find. A couple of rabbits and the crowd of their offsprings jumped away, a deer looked at him as if he was some vulgar neighbour and the birds flew away, disturbed during their evening serenades. But this was the kind of noise that would attract the telebats, small nocturnal animals that you could use for long distance communication.

        He found one on an old oak tree. It seemed to be in resonance with his cracking twigs. Rukshan hurried and caught it before the spell of his steps would dissipate.

        “Rukshan to Lhamom: Hope everything’s fine. Stop. Something happened. Stop. Need help organise trip to mountains. Over,” he whispered in the sensitive ears of the small animal. The telebat listened carefully and opened its little mouth, making sounds that no normal ears could hear. Maybe Fox could have, but he would have found it as annoying as the cracking twigs. Then Rukshan waited.

        The answer wasn’t long to come. He knew it because the ears of the creature vibrated at high frequency. He listened into the creature’s left ear where he could hear the answer.

        “Lhamom to Rukshan: Father not well. Stop. I’m worried. Stop. Have to go home take care of him. Stop. I send Drummis to help you. Over.”

        Rukshan responded with “Thanks. Stop. Hope everything well with Father. Stop. Have safe trip home. Over.”

        He hung up the telebat on the branch where he found it, and gave it a moth that he had found on his way.
        Rukshan frowned. He have never met Drummis. He wondered if he could trust him.

        #4460

        They heard a loud crash from the kitchen and rushed to see what was the poultry squawking about.

        It was Olliver, who apparently still had problems managing the landing while using his teleporting egg.
        The year that had passed had brought him a quiet assurance that the boy had lacked, even his stutter would not come as often, and his various travels using the golden egg had given him a wider outlook of what was in the world.

        “Rukji!” He called —he still would use the deferential moniker for Rukshan.
        “What is it Olliver? Calm down, can’t you see everybody is all tense?” the Fae answered.
        “Something has changed, Rukji. A great opening in the mountain. I was staying in a village I have seen a great blue light in the distance while there, across the sand and rocks desert, beyond the shifting dunes. Something that reminded me of what Gorrash told about his memories from his master. We should go explore.”
        “I’ll contact Lhamom, she may have heard stories and can help us get there until you get the hang of a group teleport.”

        #4457

        It was no shadow day. The sun was right above head, shining its blinding light right through you. Everybody at the cottage was feeling the heat and trying as much as they could to cool themselves down.
        Only Hasamelis didn’t seem to mind. Being a God even a fallen One had its perks. Eleri was glaring at him annoyed while she was profusely sweating. There was always a tense flirtatious hatred, or rather a murderous love between those two, and it kept pulling them together, in a paradoxical way.
        Everyone were glad for the herb cooler that Glynis would decant for them.

        Rukshan was looking longingly at the horizon, maybe (he wouldn’t admit) thinking about the Queen, or for some better place to be…
        But since their fire ceremonial, he could feel releasing the Shards through the burning of the book had awoken something, and danger from an unknown place seemed to be lurking beyond the mountains.

        The Doors to the God Realm had opened again, and he wasn’t all sure it was a good thing.

        #4446

        Margoritt’s left knee was painful that day. Last time it hurt so much was twenty years ago, during that notorious drought when a fire started and almost burnt the whole forest down. Only a powerful spell from the Fae people could stop it. But today they sky was clear, and the forest was enjoying a high degree of humidity from the last magic rain. Margoritt, who was not such a young lady anymore dismissed the pain as a sign of old age.
        You have to accept yourself as you are at some point, she sighed.

        The guests were still there, and everyone was participating to the life of the community. Eleri, who had been sick had been taken care of in turn by Fox and Glynnis, while Rukshan had reorganised the functioning of the farm. They now had a second cow and produced enough milk to make cakes and butter that they sold to the neighbouring Faes, and they had a small herd of Rainbow Lamas that produced the softest already colourful wool, among other things. Gorrash, awoken at night, had formed an alliance with the owls that helped them to keep the area clear of mice and rats and was also in charge of the weekly night fireworks.

        The strange colourful eggs had hatched recently giving birth to strange little creatures that were not yet sure of which shape to adopt. They sometimes looked like cuddly kittens, sometimes like cute puppies, or mischievous monkeys. They always took the form of a creature with a tail, except when they were frightened and turned into a puddle. It had been hard for Margoritt who mistook them for dog pee, but Fox had been very helpful with his keen sense of smell and washing away the poor creatures had been avoided. Nobody had any idea if they could survive once diluted in water.

        The day was going great, Margoritt sat on her rocking chair enjoying a fresh nettle lassi on the terrace while doing some embroidery work on Eleri’s blouse. Her working kit was on a small stool in front of her. Working with her hands helped her forget about her knee and also made her feel useful in this youthful community where everybody wanted to help her. She was rather proud of her last design representing a young girl and a god statue holding hands together. She didn’t think of herself as a matchmaker, but sometimes you just had to give a little push when fate didn’t want to do its job.

        Micawber Minn arrived, his face as long as the Lamazon river. He had the latest newspaper with him and put it on Margoritt’s lap. Surprise and a sudden sharp and burning pain in her knee made her left leg jerk forward, strewing all her needles onto the floor. Margoritt, upset, looked at the puddle of lassi sluggishly starting to covering them up.
        “What…” she began.
        “Read the damn paper,” said Minn.

        She did. The front page mentioned the reelection of Leroway as Lord Mayor, despite his poor results in developing the region.
        “Well, that’s not surprising,” Margoritt said with a shrug, starting to feel angry at Minn for frightening her.
        “Read further,” said Minn suddenly looking cynical.
        Margoritt continued and gasped. Her face turned blank.
        “That’s not possible. We need to tell the other,” she said. “We can not let Leroway build his road through the forest.”

        #4443

        Eleri’s recovery lasted much longer than anyone expected. Nobody really believed the old wives tale that getting soaked in the rain caused flu, but this is what appeared to have happened. She’d been out of action for such a long time that she was considerably confused about what exactly had been going on prior to her collapse. Someone ~ who? she couldn’t remember their names ~ suggested she needed one of Glynnis’s special tonic juices to revive and restore her. Perhaps even one of her extra strong turmeric latte’s. Weakly, and with a wobbly smile, Eleri agreed. She didn’t have the strength to argue about the turmeric. Not only that, she couldn’t remember why she would want to argue about the turmeric anyway.

        It is what it is, she told herself. She didn’t know what that meant really, but was too tired to think about it.

        #4433
        TracyTracy
        Participant

          What the Huntingford’s hadn’t realized was that the doline on their land wasn’t the only entrance to the labyrinth, which extended considerably further than anyone would have imagined, even the Stripling Bryson’s.

          Aubrey Stripling Bryson, whose estate was a days ride up country from the Huntingford’s, was on an expedition in the tunnels when Emerald’s dog had fallen in the doline. His family had known about the underground galleries and passages for generations; indeed, the family had made use of the ones closest to the house for centuries. Nobody knew how long, although there were stories of ancient bones being found by the more adventurous, nobody knew what happened to them, and for comforts sake and the all too familiar fear of the unknown, many of the passages had been blocked off over the years.

          Aubrey had been an adventurous lad, and had ventured further along the tunnels during his childhood than anyone, other than his sister Evelyn, would have believed. When he inherited the estate at the early age of thirty three, he prepared a proper expedition including representatives of relevant scientific authorities, intending to map the subterranean network, and write a book about his findings. Evelyn wrote most of the book for him, in fact, but he was credited with it as was the custom at the time. Aubrey had done the physical explorations and obtained various reports from experts, but Evelyn assembled it all together.

          The book was in the final stages prior to going to print, when Evelyn had disappeared. And everything relating to the book had disappeared with her. Aubrey was distraught, and never recovered, and Evelyn was never found. He ordered the final tunnel to be blocked off, leaving an usual cave house cellar, nothing more than a curiosity.

          The story of Aubrey’s book that disappeared was told to generations of Stripling Bryson children, whispered along with other family ghost stories. And there were many. Even now, there are unusual goings on at the Stripling Bryson estate, adding to the repertoire of local stranger than fiction stories.

          #4431
          Jib
          Participant

            That sunny day would be remembered as the day the doline shook and trembled.

            The geckoes fell from their rock, cutting all communication between the inhabitants of the hidden world. The vibrations coming from leperchauns know where had swiftly spread into the walls down to the deepest cracks and hidden chambers of the back cave far deeper than any of the inhabitants of the doline dared to show their noses. And Most of them weren’t aware at all of all that empty dark and cold and wet space. At some point, the vibrations gathered and rebounded into the bottom of the deepest caves and came back out in a roar that might have take the inhabitants’ hats off, if they wore hats.

            The bats flew away into the sunlight, blinded and deafened, bumping into each others as their fabulously acute sense of hearing was overwhelmed by the vibrations and the rich harmonics generated in the crystal chambers down below. Some fell, spiraling down as if they had been shot by some anti aerial defense. They fell in the cockroach arena and into the reservoir of dung gathered by the dung beetles, almost crushing Daisy in the process. Her father caught her safe and rolled her like the little dung beetle she was.

            The rats ran away spreading panic like plague, and while some tried to take advantage of the confusion to steal others food, when the vibration kept on shaking the ground around them and stalactites fell like fringe hail exploding into thousands projectiles, they began to fear.

            It took some time for the dust and noise to settle down, long after the vibration had ceased. All the inhabitants of the doline had gathered on the edge of the entrance, not knowing if it was safe to go back home.

            Hugo the Gecko wondered like many of the others.

            What just happened? What if it happened again? Somebody had to volunteer to go see what it was that made that noise.

            But no one came forth, all too shocked by the recent events. You could even hear some calling their families or friends.

            Hugo didn’t feel up to the task, he was too small and fragile. What if another of those big rocks fell on his soft and elastic body? It would explode like a water bomb. Except the puddle would be red. Yet, when he saw little Daisy desperately looking for her mother, something rose in him. Something he had never felt before. Some might call it courage, but Hugo didn’t have a name for it. All he knew was that he entered the doline and went down to the flat stone, calling his gecko friends on the way to follow him. Dragged along by that strange emotion that was moving their friend, they followed and listened to him when he gave them a few instructions. They resumed their place on the stone, except this time Hugo was at the center and began to draw something.

            The inhabitants of the doline had looked not understanding what the geckoes were doing, calling them reckless idiots to venture back into the broken world. But they looked at the strange shapes appearing on the flat stone at the center of the doline.

            Suddenly a voice came out of the crowd. “It’s me! I’m here!” she said and waved her little beetle legs. “Daisy, Mummy’s here!”

            Then everybody wanted to pass a message and the geckoes felt they were making a difference.

            Despite the agitation, Hugo kept wondering. What happened? Someone has to go and see.

            #4427
            F LoveF Love
            Participant

              “Oh, rrrrrrright. So now somebody wants to conferrrrr with me,” said Finnley petulantly, clearly still galled about the key fiasco. Not to mention the small-maid-in-the-large-trunk fiasco.

              “Oh okay! I’ll confer,” she conceded quickly as Roberto started to wander off again.

              #4426
              TracyTracy
              Participant

                Albie pondered Lottie’s words. He’d been trying to forget the doline, but now he realized he’d been avoiding the inevitable. It was no good pretending there were other jobs for him, that much was becoming clear. His mission had been to protect the doline, and he’d failed.

                Or had he? A new idea was glimmering in his mind, that he hadn’t failed at all. At first he’d been so embarrassed and anxious about the security breach that he’d only seen the obvious superficial layer of events. Yes, strangers had entered the doline; true, they were not supposed to let that happen. But now he wondered, were they strangers to the doline? Who were they? Maybe they were meant to enter, and his apparent lack of attention was a providential and timely. How did he, Albie, even know for sure that he was working for the right side? What did he really know about his bosses? And what about that handsome fellow who’d slithered out of the doline, the dark eyed one with leaves in his hair?

                Albie hadn’t even told Alex about him, not after the shit hit the fan about the breach and illegal entry. The last thing he felt like doing was admitting that there had been an illegal escape as well. But Albie couldn’t stop thinking about him, the graceful way he shook the dust out of his hair, the depths of those lustrous dark eyes, his long slender fingers….

                Now, Albie was kicking himself for hiding behind a tree, for not approaching the strange man, or at least following him to see where he was going. His job was to stop people from entering. Nobody had said anything about stopping people leaving it. It was unexpected, and he’d been scared. Was it too late to try and track his movements? He’d come out of the doline, he’d have stories to tell. Albie needed to know, he needed to find him.

                He would find a way to trace him. He wondered if the new dog could help him, if he could find something with the mans scent upon it. Albie was determined to find a way.

                #4403
                F LoveF Love
                Participant

                  random plot generator

                  A BOOK SHOP – IT IS THE AFTERNOON AFTER ALBIE HIT HIS MOTHER WITH A FEATHER.

                  Newly unemployed ALBIE is arguing with his friend JENNY RAMSBOTTOM. ALBIE tries to hug JENNY but she shakes him off angrily.

                  ALBIE
                  Please Jenny, don’t leave me.

                  JENNY
                  I’m sorry Albie, but I’m looking for somebody a bit more brave. Somebody who faces his fears head on, instead of running away. You hit your mother with a feather! You could have just talked to her!

                  ALBIE
                  I am such a person!

                  JENNY
                  I’m sorry, Albie. I just don’t feel excited by this relationship anymore.

                  JENNY leaves and ALBIE sits down, looking defeated.

                  Moments later, gentle sweet shop owner MR MATT HUMBLE barges in looking flustered.

                  ALBIE
                  Goodness, Matt! Is everything okay?

                  MATT
                  I’m afraid not.

                  ALBIE
                  What is it? Don’t keep me in suspense…

                  MATT
                  It’s … a hooligan … I saw an evil hooligan frighten a bunch of elderly ladies!

                  ALBIE
                  Defenseless elderly ladies?

                  MATT
                  Yes, defenseless elderly ladies!

                  ALBIE
                  Bloomin’ heck, Matt! We’ve got to do something.

                  MATT
                  I agree, but I wouldn’t know where to start.

                  ALBIE
                  You can start by telling me where this happened.

                  MATT
                  I was…
                  MATT fans himself and begins to wheeze.

                  ALBIE
                  Focus Matt, focus! Where did it happen?

                  MATT
                  The Library! That’s right – the Library!

                  ALBIE springs up and begins to run.

                  EXT. A ROADCONTINUOUS

                  ALBIE rushes along the street, followed by MATT. They take a short cut through some back gardens, jumping fences along the way.

                  INT. A LIBRARYSHORTLY AFTER

                  ROGER BLUNDER a forgetful hooligan terrorises two elderly ladies.

                  ALBIE, closely followed by MATT, rushes towards ROGER, but suddenly stops in his tracks.

                  MATT
                  What is is? What’s the matter?

                  ALBIE
                  That’s not just any old hooligan, that’s Roger Blunder!

                  MATT
                  Who’s Roger Blunder?

                  ALBIE
                  Who’s Roger Blunder? Who’s Roger Blunder? Only the most forgetful hooligan in the universe!

                  MATT
                  Blinkin’ knickers, Albie! We’re going to need some help if we’re going to stop the most forgetful hooligan in the universe!

                  ALBIE
                  You can say that again.

                  MATT
                  Blinkin’ knickers, Albie! We’re going to need some help if we’re going to stop the most forgetful hooligan in the universe!

                  ALBIE
                  I’m going to need candlesticks, lots of candlesticks.

                  Roger turns and sees Albie and Matt. He grins an evil grin.

                  ROGER
                  Albie Jones, we meet again!

                  MATT
                  You’ve met?

                  ALBIE
                  Yes. It was a long, long time ago…

                  EXT. A PARKBACK IN TIME

                  A young ALBIE is sitting in a park listening to some trance music, when suddenly a dark shadow casts over him.

                  He looks up and sees ROGER. He takes off his headphones.

                  ROGER
                  Would you like some wine gums?

                  ALBIE’s eyes light up, but then he studies ROGER more closely, and looks uneasy.

                  ALBIE
                  I don’t know, you look kind of forgetful.

                  ROGER
                  Me? No. I’m not forgetful. I’m the least forgetful hooligan in the world.

                  ALBIE
                  Wait, you’re a hooligan?

                  ALBIE runs away, screaming.

                  INT. A LIBRARYPRESENT DAY

                  ROGER
                  You were a coward then, and you are a coward now.

                  MATT
                  (To ALBIE) You ran away?
                  ALBIE
                  (To MATT) I was a young child. What was I supposed to do?
                  ALBIE turns to ROGER.

                  ALBIE
                  I may have run away from you then, but I won’t run away this time!
                  ALBIE runs away.

                  He turns back and shouts.

                  ALBIE
                  I mean, I am running away, but I’ll be back – with candlesticks.

                  ROGER
                  I’m not scared of you.

                  ALBIE
                  You should be.

                  INT. A SWEET SHOPLATER THAT DAY

                  ALBIE and MATT walk around searching for something.

                  ALBIE
                  I feel sure I left my candlesticks somewhere around here.

                  MATT
                  Are you sure? It does seem like an odd place to keep deadly candlesticks.

                  ALBIE
                  You know nothing Matt Humble.

                  MATT
                  We’ve been searching for ages. I really don’t think they’re here.

                  Suddenly, ROGER appears, holding a pair of candlesticks.

                  ROGER
                  Looking for something?

                  MATT
                  Crikey, Albie, he’s got your candlesticks.

                  ALBIE
                  Tell me something I don’t already know!

                  MATT
                  The earth’s circumference at the equator is about 40,075 km.

                  ALBIE
                  I know that already!

                  MATT
                  I’m afraid of dust.

                  ROGER
                  (appalled) Dude!

                  While ROGER is looking at MATT with disgust, ALBIE lunges forward and grabs his deadly candlesticks. He wields them, triumphantly.

                  ALBIE
                  Prepare to die, you forgetful aubergine!

                  ROGER
                  No please! All I did was frighten a bunch of elderly ladies!

                  JENNY enters, unseen by any of the others.

                  ALBIE
                  I cannot tolerate that kind of behaviour! Those elderly ladies were defenceless! Well now they have a defender – and that’s me! Albie Jones defender of innocent elderly ladies.

                  ROGER
                  Don’t hurt me! Please!

                  ALBIE
                  Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t use these candlesticks on you right away!

                  ROGER
                  Because Albie, I am your father.

                  ALBIE looks stunned for a few moments, but then collects himself.

                  ALBIE
                  No you’re not!

                  ROGER
                  Ah well, it had to be worth a try.

                  ROGER tries to grab the candlesticks but ALBIE dodges out of the way.

                  ALBIE
                  Who’s the daddy now? Huh? Huh?

                  Unexpectedly, ROGER slumps to the ground.

                  MATT
                  Did he just faint?

                  ALBIE
                  I think so. Well that’s disappointing. I was rather hoping for a more dramatic conclusion, involving my deadly candlesticks.

                  ALBIE crouches over ROGER’s body.

                  MATT
                  Be careful, Albie. It could be a trick.

                  ALBIE
                  No, it’s not a trick. It appears that… It would seem… Roger Blunder is dead!

                  ALBIE
                  What?

                  ALBIE
                  Yes, it appears that I scared him to death.

                  MATT claps his hands.

                  MATT
                  So your candlesticks did save the day, after all.

                  JENNY steps forward.

                  JENNY
                  Is it true? Did you kill the forgetful hooligan?

                  ALBIE
                  Jenny how long have you been…?

                  JENNY puts her arm around ALBIE.

                  JENNY
                  Long enough.

                  ALBIE
                  Then you saw it for yourself. I killed Roger Blunder.

                  JENNY
                  Then the elderly ladies are safe?

                  ALBIE
                  It does seem that way!

                  A crowd of vulnerable elderly ladies enter, looking relived.

                  JENNY
                  You are their hero.

                  The elderly ladies bow to ALBIE.

                  ALBIE
                  There is no need to bow to me. I seek no worship. The knowledge that Roger Blunder will never frighten elderly ladies ever again, is enough for me.

                  JENNY
                  You are humble as well as brave! And I think that makes up for hitting your mother with a feather. It does in my opinion!

                  One of the elderly ladies passes ALBIE a healing ring

                  JENNY
                  I think they want you to have it, as a symbol of their gratitude.

                  ALBIE
                  I couldn’t possibly.
                  Pause.

                  ALBIE
                  Well, if you insist. It could come in handy when I go to the Doline tomorrow. With my friend Matt. It is dangerous and only for brave people and a healing ring could come in handy.

                  ALBIE takes the ring.

                  ALBIE
                  Thank you.
                  The elderly ladies bow their heads once more, and leave.

                  ALBIE turns to JENNY.

                  ALBIE
                  Does this mean you want me back?

                  JENNY
                  Oh, Albie, of course I want you back!
                  ALBIE smiles for a few seconds, but then looks defiant.

                  ALBIE
                  Well you can’t have me.

                  JENNY
                  WHAT?

                  ALBIE
                  You had no faith in me. You had to see my scare a hooligan to death before you would believe in me. I don’t want a lover like that. And I am going to the Doline and I may not be back!

                  JENNY
                  But…

                  ALBIE
                  Please leave. I want to spend time with the one person who stayed with me through thick and thin – my best friend, Matt.

                  MATT grins.

                  JENNY
                  But…

                  MATT
                  You heard the gentleman. Now be off with you. Skidaddle! Shoo!

                  JENNY
                  Albie?

                  ALBIE
                  I’m sorry Jenny, but I think you should skidaddle.
                  JENNY leaves.

                  MATT turns to ALBIE.

                  MATT
                  Did you mean that? You know … that I’m your best friend?

                  ALBIE
                  Of course you are!
                  The two walk off arm in arm.

                  Suddenly MATT stops.

                  MATT
                  When I said I’m afraid of dust, you know I was just trying to distract the hooligan don’t you?

                  #4390
                  F LoveF Love
                  Participant

                    “She found the entrance, you say?”

                    “I am afraid so. I am sorry indeed to say that this is the case.”

                    “How could she have found the way in? Where were the guards? And who is she who would dare to enter the Doline?”

                    “It’s been so long … I think the guards got lazy. And who can blame them … so many years they stood at their post and nobody even trying to find the way in. I think they got tired of waiting for something to happen. And as to who it is … all I have heard is she is a traveller and not anyone from the Village. A traveller from far off parts, I have heard.”

                    “Dearie me … always the way, isn’t it? Heads are going to roll of course and I wouldn’t want to be in their shoes. What’s going to happen now?”

                    “It’s very hard to get someone out once they have found the way in. That’s a well known truth.”

                    “It is indeed. Indeed it is.”

                    #4351

                    “Oh no!” Margoritt swore loudly, “not that cursed rain again!”.
                    They were about to share what was left of the cake for dessert when the first booming strike of thunder resounded violently across the mountains.

                    She cupped her hands in front of her mouth to rally the troops over the noisy rumble of the heavy dark clouds. “Inside! Everyone inside!” — when the rains started in spring, they could go on for days, drenching the countryside in curtains of water.

                    The first drops falling, quickly extinguishing the candles, Rukshan raised his head to look at the darker skies covering completely the moon’s glow “This is no ordinary rain…”

                    “You bet, it isn’t!” Margoritt said, looking more sombre than she ever was. “That magical umbrella won’t be enough this time, we are probably going to have to sit that one out inside. Help me bring the animals inside.”

                    In front of the small cottage, everyone else started to hurry inside, bringing back the plates, cups and leftovers, while Rukshan was preparing some wood for the fire to keep the moist away.

                    “Has anybody seen Eleri?” Yorath’s look was concerned. “She seem to have disappeared somewhere as usual… But she hasn’t come back yet,… and I’m afraid she took a large bite of the trancing cake too. It’s not a good night to trance out.”

                    Rukshan was torn between waiting a bit longer, or going to search for her, which would be risking lives during the dark stormy night. He was about to offer to go outside himself when Gorrash said briskly:
                    “Let me go find her, this storm is nothing, and I’m used to the dark. You all should stay inside. If I don’t come back at the break of dawn, you can go out to look for us, but don’t worry too much about me, I’ll blend in.” He winked at Fox who smiled weakly. He didn’t like this type of cold rain. Its smell was damp and rotten.

                    “Thank you Gorrash, that is very noble of you. Please, take care of yourself, and be back soon.” Rukshan said as he opened the door which was now jerking violently against the darkest night.

                    #4350
                    ÉricÉric
                    Keymaster

                      Those things people discard… in his life as the rubbish collector, Pepe had seen many. The unusual large package was just one of the highlights of the day; it’s like Providence meant for him to have this thrown away parcel.

                      Curious they didn’t even bother to open it, though he thought as he put it on the front of the truck. He probably would keep it for awhile, to see if anybody claims it back. You’d never know with the lot of crazy hoarding people in this lot. It was not the first time their batty help threw stuff away.

                      If not, whatever that was inside would probably join his large collection.
                      Over 20 years of gathering discarded books, he could almost open a library. And it didn’t matter how much he would give away, more would come back. It was a blessed curse, he used to say.

                      #4345
                      TracyTracy
                      Participant

                        “Finnley, go and tell Roberto to bring the ladder. I can’t possibly climb up through that trap door with those rickety steps, I want a proper ladder. And proper gardener to hold it steady. I wouldn’t trust any of you lot,” she said, glaring at them each in turn.

                        Finnley made a rude sign behind Elizabeth’s back, and clumped back down the stairs. Increasingly heated bickering between Liz and the Inspector ensued. Godfrey wandered off down the hallway tutting and shaking his head, and then darted into a spare bedroom and fell sound asleep on the bed.

                        Expecting a tongue lashing from Liz for being so long, Finnley was surprised that nobody noticed her return. She cleared her throat a few times trying to get their attention.

                        “Go and get yourself a spoonful of honey and stop making that ghastly croaking noise, Finnley!”

                        “The thing is, Liz,” replied the maid, “He’s gone.”

                        “Who?”

                        Exasperated, Finnley’s voice rose to an alarming falsetto. “The gardener! Roberto! He’s gone, and what’s more, he’s taken the sack with him!”

                        “Do get a grip, Finnley, he’s probably just taking the rubbish out. Now then, Walter, if you think I’ve forgiven you for that day when you….he’s taken what? What did you say?”

                        Elizabeth blanched, waving her arms around wildly as if she was drowning.

                        “I know a good gardener who’s looking for a job,” the Inspector said helpfully.

                        “You utter fool!” Elizabeth rounded on him. “My babies have been stolen and you talk about gardening! Never mind that German, or whatever it was you said you’re doing here, go and catch that thief!”

                        Raising an eyebrow, Finnley wondered if this was just another fiasco, or was it really a cleverly engineered plot?

                        #4342

                        The dinner had already started, the roasted chicken half devoured, and Fox turned redder when he saw Rukshan’s dismayed look. The Fae seemed much too rigid at times.

                        It was a good and cheerful assembly, and Lahmom the traveller of the high plateaus, with her adorned cowboy hat always proudly put on her golden locks of hair, was telling them of the shamanic practices of the people of those far-away places she had seen in her voyages.
                        It was all fascinating to hear, she had such a love for the people that she beamed though her sparkly eyes when she was telling them the tales of those shamans, and how they would drum in circles and be able to communicate with their group spirit…

                        “We should do that sometimes” a surprisingly talkative Gorrash said, as he munched his way though a large ear of maize. He seemed almost drunk on the fermented goat milk that he had found pleasantly attracted to.

                        “Oh, I’m sure we can find some old skin somewhere around my stuff” Margoritt said, amused at the idea of the challenge.
                        Lahmom winked at Tak who was hiding behind his plate, but not missing any word of the lively exchanges.

                        “In all your travels, have you been to any of those places?” Lahmom asked Yorath who seemed distracted.
                        “I’m sorry, what?” he wasn’t paying too much attention “Has anybody seen Eleri?”

                        #4340

                        Eleri’s eyes began to feel heavy and she blinked, trying to resist the increasingly strong urge to nod off to sleep, as a gust of wind rustled the branches overhead allowing the moonlight to illuminate something that looked very much like dragon scales. Eleri blinked again and shook her head slightly to shake the illusion back into some kind of realistic image. The sudden wind had dropped and the trees were motionless, the path below them dark. It was impossible now to even see what had looked like dragon scales in the brief flash of moonlight. All was still and silent.

                        With nothing to see in the darkness and nothing to entertain her, Eleri’s mind started to wander, wondering if her grandmother being a dragon (as her father had often said) meant that she was one quarter dragon herself. It occurred to her that she very rarely thought of the dragon that was her grandmother, and wondered why she was thinking of her now. She had been a strong woman, who would fight tooth and nail to get what she wanted, always on the move wanting to get her teeth into a new project, leaving discarded suitors along the wayside as she swept along, grandly announcing to all and sundry, “Do you know who I am?”

                        Formidable armed with a rigid crocodile (possibly baby dragon skin) handbag and matching shoes, stately and considerably girthy notwithstanding the stiff corset, her grandmother was not one to easily ignore. Dressed in dragon scale twinsets, in no nonsense crimplene navy blue and white, many were quite charmed by her forthright manner and the spirited ~ some would say arrogant ~ toss of her peroxide lacquered waves. Others were not so enchanted, and found her imperious manner unpleasant.

                        It was a simple matter of teeth, when it came to disabling her. The difference was remarkable. There was no actual reason why her lack of teeth should change her so ~ she still had the matching shoes and handbags, but the regal stance and the arrogant tilt of her chin was gone. Not having any teeth made her seem shy and evasive, and she mumbled, saying as little as possible. She lost the power of manipulation along with her teeth, and although nobody really understood why, many wished they had thought of hiding her teeth years ago. It was such a simple solution, in the scale of things.

                        And the moral of that story is, Eleri concluded with a wry but not too dentally challenged smile, Toothless Dragons Don’t Bite.

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                      • “Right, that does it! I’m moving the whole family back to the right story!” said Aunt Idle, invigorated and emboldened with the sweet energy of the honey. “Bloody cackling nonsense!” ... · ID #3961 (continued)
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