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  • Head Parcel, the postie, met What, What Ever said, “Head, I’m What.” “You’re What?” said Head. “That’s right!” What said, “I’m What Ever, Head Parcel, or What.” :penthingy: ... · ID #922 (continued)
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  • #4576
    TracyTracy
    Participant

      “What you all don’t realize,” Liz said, “Is that all of this so called fun is in fact highly significant. You think we’re all playing around scribbling nonsense and gadding about on the lawn acting the fool for no reason just for something to do. But this is a vital and rare artifact in the future! My dears, you have no idea!”

      “I think it might be vascular dementia,” Finnley whispered to Roberto, “I read about it in a magazine this morning.”

      “Mint tea from the Basque country?” replied Roberto, holding his glass up to the light for a closer look.

      Finnley rolled her eyes and inched closer to Godfrey, hoping for a better response when she told him her theory.

      “Imagine her in a denim basque, you say? I’d rather not! HA!” Godfrey spit out a few bits of peanut with the final HA!, which was forceful enough to send a few of them flying across the room.

      “You’ve got bits of nut in my Basque mint tea now!” Roberto exclaimed ~ somewhat rudely; he forgot for a moment he was just the gardener.

      “I think they’ve all lost their marbles,” remarked Liz, just for the written record for the historians in the future who would find this story; and for the benefit of the AI they had unwittingly been programming all along. Although what the AI was actually being programmed with perhaps didn’t bear thinking about. A further though nagged at Liz despite her efforts to ignore it. What if it did matter? What were they creating?

      #4549

      A deep guttural roar echoed through the mountains, ferocious and hungry.
      Fox’s hairs stood on his arms and neck as a wave of panic rolled through his body. He looked at the other his eyes wide open.
      Olliver had teleported closer to Rukshan whose face seemed pale despite the warmth of the fire, and Lhamom’s jaw had dropped open. Their eyes met and they swallowed in unison.
      “Is that…” asked Fox. His voice had been so low that he wasn’t sure someone had heard him.
      Rukshan nodded.

      “It seems you are leaving the mountains sooner than you expected,” said Kumihimo with a jolly smile as she dismounted Ronaldo.
      She plucked her icy lyre from which loud and rich harmonics bounced. The wind carried them along and they echoed back in defiance to the Shadow. It hissed and hurled back, clearly pissed off. The dogs howled and Kumihimo started to play a wild and powerful rhythm on her instrument.
      It shook the group awake from their trance of terror. Everobody stood and ran in chaos.
      Someone tried to cover the fire.
      “Don’t bother, we’re leaving,” said Rukshan, and he himself rushed toward the multicolour sand mandala he had made earlier that day. Accompanied by the witche’s mad arpeggios, he began chanting. The sand glowed faintly. It needed something more for the magic to take the relay. Something resisted. There was a strong gush of wind and Rukshan bent forward just in time as the screen and bamboo poles flew above his head. His chanting held the sands together, but they needed to act quickly.

      Lhamom told the others to jump on the hellishcopter whose carpet was slowly turning in a clockwise direction. Fox didn’t wait to be told twice but Olliver stood his ground.
      “But I want to help,” he said.
      “You’ll help best by being ready to leave as soon as the portal opens,” said Lhamom. Not checking if the boy was following her order, she went to her messenger bag and foraged for the bottle of holy snot. On her way to the mandala, she picked the magic spoon from the steaming cauldron of stew, leaving a path of thick dark stains in the snow.

      Lhamom stopped beside Rukshan who had rivulets of sweat flowing on his face and his coat fluttering wildly in the angry wind. He’s barely holding the sands together, she thought. She didn’t like being rushed, it made her act mindlessly. She opened the holy snot bottle and was about to pour it in the spoon covered in sauce, but she saw Rukshan’s frown of horror. She realised the red sauce might have unforgivable influence on the portal spell. She felt a nudge on her right arm, it was Ronaldo. Lhamom didn’t think twice and held the spoon for him to lick.
      “Enjoy yourself!” she said. If the sauce’s not good, what about donkey saliva? she wondered, her inner voice sounding a tad hysterical. But it was not a time for meditation. She poured the holy snot in the relatively clean spoon, pronounced the spell the Lama had told her in the ancient tongue and prayed it all worked out as she poured it in the center of the mandala.
      As soon as it touched the sand, they combined together in a glossy resin. The texture spread quickly to all the mandala and a dark line appeared above it. The portal teared open. Rukshan continued to chant until it was big enough to allow the hellishcopter through.

      COME NOW!” shouted Fox.
      Rukshan and Lhamom looked at the hellishcopter, behind it an immense shadow had engulfed the night. It was different from the darkness of the portal that was full of potential and probabilities and energy. The Shadow was chaotic and mad and light was absent from it. It was spreading fast and Lhamom felt panic overwhelm her.

      They ran. Jumped on the carpet. Kumihimo threw an ice flute to them and Fox caught it not knowing what to do with it.
      “You’ll have one note!” the shaman shouted. “One note to destroy the Shadow when you arrive!”
      Fox nodded unable to speak. His heart was frozen by the dark presence.
      Kumihimo hit the hellishcopter as if it were a horse, and it bounced forward. The shaman looked at them disappear through the tear, soon followed by the shadow.
      The wind stopped. Kumihimo heard the dogs approaching. They too wanted to go through. But before they could do so, Kumihimo closed the portal with a last chord that made her lyre explode.

      The dogs growled menacingly, frustrated they had been denied their hunt.
      They closed in slowly on Kumihimo and Ronaldo who licked a drop of sauce from his lips.

      #4540

      Talking with the dogs. That’s what Fox had to do. Easier said than done, he thought scratching his head. His previous encounters with dogs were rather tumultuous and limited to being hunted down in the forest during a hunting party or being chased at the market because he had caught a hen. He had never really talked to dogs before, unless taunting counted of course.

      Rukshan had said it was urgent, but Fox found there were so many little things to do before, like tidying up the cave, putting some suncream on his sensitive red head skin, or trying to see if Lhamom needed help.

      But after some time, Fox realised he had to go eventually. Everyone else was busy with their own part of the plan. Rukshan was building the sand mandala on a flat surface that he and Olliver had cleared, and Lhamom was finishing a makeshift screen to protect the mandala from the wind with a few bamboo poles and rolls of fabrics she had found on her journey here. It was very colourful fabric with Bootanese patterns that Fox wouldn’t have used to cover a chair. It felt too busy for him.

      So, he went to see Lhamom as she was struggling to plant the last stick in the rocky ground.

      “Have you talked to the dogs? she asked.
      “Ehr, not yet,” mumbled Fox who felt a bit ashamed when Lhamom frowned. “I think I need to give some kind of present to the dogs and I was wondering if you had something suitable in your many bags.”
      “Oh! Sure. Can you finish that for me then?” she asked.
      “Sure,” said Fox. He replaced her with the bamboo stick and, as she was walking away, he shouted: “I don’t think chocolate will do this time.”
      “Oh! I know,” she said with a smile and a wink. It cheered Fox up a little bit, but a gush of wind called him back to his task of holding the pole. Once he secured it he put on an awkward smile, but noticed that Rukshan and Olliver were too busy to have noticed.

      Lhamom came back with a big ham which Fox thought was more than suitable. He thanked her and made a joke about leaving her with her pole that he thought afterword he should not have done and walked away from the camp in the crunchy snow.

      Fox had been aware that the dogs were observing him, and especially the big ham he was carrying. A few of them had begun to gather at a distance and they were beginning to whine, which attracted more of them. When he estimated he was far enough from the camp he put the ham down. He couldn’t transform into that many layers of clothes so he started to undress, watching wearily the dogs that were now growling.

      It was freezing outside and Fox was shocked by how skinny his body had become. He shivered badly and focused to change into his natural red fox. It took him a little bit longer than usual but when the fur grew and started to keep the warmth close to his body, he growled with pleasure. The world around him changed as his senses transformed. Colours were different and slightly less varied, sounds were more crisp and a profusion of noises he couldn’t hear as a human suddenly vied for his attention: the sound of the wind on the rocks, the harmonics of the dogs’ voices, and the scents… simply incomparable. He wished he had kept the ham for himself.

      “It’s a fox!” barked a voice.
      “Let’s kill it!” said another.
      “Where’s the two-legged gone?” asked a young dog.
      “Who cares? It brought us meat. It’s gone. Let’s eat!”

      Fox suddenly regretted he had made a full change.

      #4446

      Margoritt’s left knee was painful that day. Last time it hurt so much was twenty years ago, during that notorious drought when a fire started and almost burnt the whole forest down. Only a powerful spell from the Fae people could stop it. But today they sky was clear, and the forest was enjoying a high degree of humidity from the last magic rain. Margoritt, who was not such a young lady anymore dismissed the pain as a sign of old age.
      You have to accept yourself as you are at some point, she sighed.

      The guests were still there, and everyone was participating to the life of the community. Eleri, who had been sick had been taken care of in turn by Fox and Glynnis, while Rukshan had reorganised the functioning of the farm. They now had a second cow and produced enough milk to make cakes and butter that they sold to the neighbouring Faes, and they had a small herd of Rainbow Lamas that produced the softest already colourful wool, among other things. Gorrash, awoken at night, had formed an alliance with the owls that helped them to keep the area clear of mice and rats and was also in charge of the weekly night fireworks.

      The strange colourful eggs had hatched recently giving birth to strange little creatures that were not yet sure of which shape to adopt. They sometimes looked like cuddly kittens, sometimes like cute puppies, or mischievous monkeys. They always took the form of a creature with a tail, except when they were frightened and turned into a puddle. It had been hard for Margoritt who mistook them for dog pee, but Fox had been very helpful with his keen sense of smell and washing away the poor creatures had been avoided. Nobody had any idea if they could survive once diluted in water.

      The day was going great, Margoritt sat on her rocking chair enjoying a fresh nettle lassi on the terrace while doing some embroidery work on Eleri’s blouse. Her working kit was on a small stool in front of her. Working with her hands helped her forget about her knee and also made her feel useful in this youthful community where everybody wanted to help her. She was rather proud of her last design representing a young girl and a god statue holding hands together. She didn’t think of herself as a matchmaker, but sometimes you just had to give a little push when fate didn’t want to do its job.

      Micawber Minn arrived, his face as long as the Lamazon river. He had the latest newspaper with him and put it on Margoritt’s lap. Surprise and a sudden sharp and burning pain in her knee made her left leg jerk forward, strewing all her needles onto the floor. Margoritt, upset, looked at the puddle of lassi sluggishly starting to covering them up.
      “What…” she began.
      “Read the damn paper,” said Minn.

      She did. The front page mentioned the reelection of Leroway as Lord Mayor, despite his poor results in developing the region.
      “Well, that’s not surprising,” Margoritt said with a shrug, starting to feel angry at Minn for frightening her.
      “Read further,” said Minn suddenly looking cynical.
      Margoritt continued and gasped. Her face turned blank.
      “That’s not possible. We need to tell the other,” she said. “We can not let Leroway build his road through the forest.”

      #4416

      In reply to: Scrying the Word Cloud

      TracyTracy
      Participant

        thick straight meant space
        hoped house sadness
        seven waiting desire lost shook
        holding front hand unexpected
        hold thought sleep hut mum

        #4403
        F LoveF Love
        Participant

          random plot generator

          A BOOK SHOP – IT IS THE AFTERNOON AFTER ALBIE HIT HIS MOTHER WITH A FEATHER.

          Newly unemployed ALBIE is arguing with his friend JENNY RAMSBOTTOM. ALBIE tries to hug JENNY but she shakes him off angrily.

          ALBIE
          Please Jenny, don’t leave me.

          JENNY
          I’m sorry Albie, but I’m looking for somebody a bit more brave. Somebody who faces his fears head on, instead of running away. You hit your mother with a feather! You could have just talked to her!

          ALBIE
          I am such a person!

          JENNY
          I’m sorry, Albie. I just don’t feel excited by this relationship anymore.

          JENNY leaves and ALBIE sits down, looking defeated.

          Moments later, gentle sweet shop owner MR MATT HUMBLE barges in looking flustered.

          ALBIE
          Goodness, Matt! Is everything okay?

          MATT
          I’m afraid not.

          ALBIE
          What is it? Don’t keep me in suspense…

          MATT
          It’s … a hooligan … I saw an evil hooligan frighten a bunch of elderly ladies!

          ALBIE
          Defenseless elderly ladies?

          MATT
          Yes, defenseless elderly ladies!

          ALBIE
          Bloomin’ heck, Matt! We’ve got to do something.

          MATT
          I agree, but I wouldn’t know where to start.

          ALBIE
          You can start by telling me where this happened.

          MATT
          I was…
          MATT fans himself and begins to wheeze.

          ALBIE
          Focus Matt, focus! Where did it happen?

          MATT
          The Library! That’s right – the Library!

          ALBIE springs up and begins to run.

          EXT. A ROADCONTINUOUS

          ALBIE rushes along the street, followed by MATT. They take a short cut through some back gardens, jumping fences along the way.

          INT. A LIBRARYSHORTLY AFTER

          ROGER BLUNDER a forgetful hooligan terrorises two elderly ladies.

          ALBIE, closely followed by MATT, rushes towards ROGER, but suddenly stops in his tracks.

          MATT
          What is is? What’s the matter?

          ALBIE
          That’s not just any old hooligan, that’s Roger Blunder!

          MATT
          Who’s Roger Blunder?

          ALBIE
          Who’s Roger Blunder? Who’s Roger Blunder? Only the most forgetful hooligan in the universe!

          MATT
          Blinkin’ knickers, Albie! We’re going to need some help if we’re going to stop the most forgetful hooligan in the universe!

          ALBIE
          You can say that again.

          MATT
          Blinkin’ knickers, Albie! We’re going to need some help if we’re going to stop the most forgetful hooligan in the universe!

          ALBIE
          I’m going to need candlesticks, lots of candlesticks.

          Roger turns and sees Albie and Matt. He grins an evil grin.

          ROGER
          Albie Jones, we meet again!

          MATT
          You’ve met?

          ALBIE
          Yes. It was a long, long time ago…

          EXT. A PARKBACK IN TIME

          A young ALBIE is sitting in a park listening to some trance music, when suddenly a dark shadow casts over him.

          He looks up and sees ROGER. He takes off his headphones.

          ROGER
          Would you like some wine gums?

          ALBIE’s eyes light up, but then he studies ROGER more closely, and looks uneasy.

          ALBIE
          I don’t know, you look kind of forgetful.

          ROGER
          Me? No. I’m not forgetful. I’m the least forgetful hooligan in the world.

          ALBIE
          Wait, you’re a hooligan?

          ALBIE runs away, screaming.

          INT. A LIBRARYPRESENT DAY

          ROGER
          You were a coward then, and you are a coward now.

          MATT
          (To ALBIE) You ran away?
          ALBIE
          (To MATT) I was a young child. What was I supposed to do?
          ALBIE turns to ROGER.

          ALBIE
          I may have run away from you then, but I won’t run away this time!
          ALBIE runs away.

          He turns back and shouts.

          ALBIE
          I mean, I am running away, but I’ll be back – with candlesticks.

          ROGER
          I’m not scared of you.

          ALBIE
          You should be.

          INT. A SWEET SHOPLATER THAT DAY

          ALBIE and MATT walk around searching for something.

          ALBIE
          I feel sure I left my candlesticks somewhere around here.

          MATT
          Are you sure? It does seem like an odd place to keep deadly candlesticks.

          ALBIE
          You know nothing Matt Humble.

          MATT
          We’ve been searching for ages. I really don’t think they’re here.

          Suddenly, ROGER appears, holding a pair of candlesticks.

          ROGER
          Looking for something?

          MATT
          Crikey, Albie, he’s got your candlesticks.

          ALBIE
          Tell me something I don’t already know!

          MATT
          The earth’s circumference at the equator is about 40,075 km.

          ALBIE
          I know that already!

          MATT
          I’m afraid of dust.

          ROGER
          (appalled) Dude!

          While ROGER is looking at MATT with disgust, ALBIE lunges forward and grabs his deadly candlesticks. He wields them, triumphantly.

          ALBIE
          Prepare to die, you forgetful aubergine!

          ROGER
          No please! All I did was frighten a bunch of elderly ladies!

          JENNY enters, unseen by any of the others.

          ALBIE
          I cannot tolerate that kind of behaviour! Those elderly ladies were defenceless! Well now they have a defender – and that’s me! Albie Jones defender of innocent elderly ladies.

          ROGER
          Don’t hurt me! Please!

          ALBIE
          Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t use these candlesticks on you right away!

          ROGER
          Because Albie, I am your father.

          ALBIE looks stunned for a few moments, but then collects himself.

          ALBIE
          No you’re not!

          ROGER
          Ah well, it had to be worth a try.

          ROGER tries to grab the candlesticks but ALBIE dodges out of the way.

          ALBIE
          Who’s the daddy now? Huh? Huh?

          Unexpectedly, ROGER slumps to the ground.

          MATT
          Did he just faint?

          ALBIE
          I think so. Well that’s disappointing. I was rather hoping for a more dramatic conclusion, involving my deadly candlesticks.

          ALBIE crouches over ROGER’s body.

          MATT
          Be careful, Albie. It could be a trick.

          ALBIE
          No, it’s not a trick. It appears that… It would seem… Roger Blunder is dead!

          ALBIE
          What?

          ALBIE
          Yes, it appears that I scared him to death.

          MATT claps his hands.

          MATT
          So your candlesticks did save the day, after all.

          JENNY steps forward.

          JENNY
          Is it true? Did you kill the forgetful hooligan?

          ALBIE
          Jenny how long have you been…?

          JENNY puts her arm around ALBIE.

          JENNY
          Long enough.

          ALBIE
          Then you saw it for yourself. I killed Roger Blunder.

          JENNY
          Then the elderly ladies are safe?

          ALBIE
          It does seem that way!

          A crowd of vulnerable elderly ladies enter, looking relived.

          JENNY
          You are their hero.

          The elderly ladies bow to ALBIE.

          ALBIE
          There is no need to bow to me. I seek no worship. The knowledge that Roger Blunder will never frighten elderly ladies ever again, is enough for me.

          JENNY
          You are humble as well as brave! And I think that makes up for hitting your mother with a feather. It does in my opinion!

          One of the elderly ladies passes ALBIE a healing ring

          JENNY
          I think they want you to have it, as a symbol of their gratitude.

          ALBIE
          I couldn’t possibly.
          Pause.

          ALBIE
          Well, if you insist. It could come in handy when I go to the Doline tomorrow. With my friend Matt. It is dangerous and only for brave people and a healing ring could come in handy.

          ALBIE takes the ring.

          ALBIE
          Thank you.
          The elderly ladies bow their heads once more, and leave.

          ALBIE turns to JENNY.

          ALBIE
          Does this mean you want me back?

          JENNY
          Oh, Albie, of course I want you back!
          ALBIE smiles for a few seconds, but then looks defiant.

          ALBIE
          Well you can’t have me.

          JENNY
          WHAT?

          ALBIE
          You had no faith in me. You had to see my scare a hooligan to death before you would believe in me. I don’t want a lover like that. And I am going to the Doline and I may not be back!

          JENNY
          But…

          ALBIE
          Please leave. I want to spend time with the one person who stayed with me through thick and thin – my best friend, Matt.

          MATT grins.

          JENNY
          But…

          MATT
          You heard the gentleman. Now be off with you. Skidaddle! Shoo!

          JENNY
          Albie?

          ALBIE
          I’m sorry Jenny, but I think you should skidaddle.
          JENNY leaves.

          MATT turns to ALBIE.

          MATT
          Did you mean that? You know … that I’m your best friend?

          ALBIE
          Of course you are!
          The two walk off arm in arm.

          Suddenly MATT stops.

          MATT
          When I said I’m afraid of dust, you know I was just trying to distract the hooligan don’t you?

          #4385

          In reply to: Scrying the Word Cloud

          TracyTracy
          Participant

            leaving gardener
            doctor pull potions
            whatever hold threads
            potion holding memory dreaming spot
            book present
            making rude names fear round

            #4328
            F LoveF Love
            Participant

              All of a sudden, Godfrey flung the peanut butter jar he was holding to the ground where it smashed into dozens of glittering fragments.

              “Silly me,” he said. “How clumsy! Clean that up will you, Finnley.”

              Finnley glared at him, torn between annoyance at being treated as a mere cleaner and relief at having an excuse to leave the room and dispose of that darn sack, once and for all.

              Common sense won. There is plenty of time to make him pay for that, she thought.

              “Right you are, Sir,” she said, with an inadvertent roll of the eyes. “Right away, Sir.”

              #4297

              In reply to: Scrying the Word Cloud

              TracyTracy
              Participant

                happened window creature
                retorted next reporter
                immediately plan bossy real listening
                feel appeared sense against replied breathing
                whole question dreams holding

                #4272

                Kumihimo was rummaging through the content of a wooden chest at the back of the cave. According to the smell it had spent too much time in the dark and humid environment. She might have to do some spring cleaning one day. But the chest was now too heavy for her to carry. I need an apprentice for this, she thought not knowing if if was a wish or a regret.

                In that chest, she had her many tools of the thread. Some were made of bones and she had carved them herself under the direction of her spirit guides. Each one had a specific purpose, either to catch, to extract, to guide, or to dissipate, and many more usages that even she had forgotten after so many years spent in that place.

                She had accumulated so many things in that chest. Fortunately she liked miniature, and most of her creations were seldom bigger than her little finger. However that made it difficult to keep things in order and finding something was often a real challenge. So she sang lullabies to lure the object she was looking for out of their sanctuary.

                Victory! she exulted in the ancient tongue, which would translate also as ‘I have done all that is necessary to harvest the benefits of the next crop’. Kumihimo liked simple things and she liked when one word could signify a very complex meaning. Under an old donkey skin that she often used to camouflage herself when she was going down in the valley, she had found the loom she had been looking for.

                The loom was made from the right shoulder blade of a bear. It was one of the first objects she had carved when she arrived in the vicinity. It had a yellowish patina and felt very smooth in her hands. Its shape was octagonal and each side had seven notches under which were three rows of symbols, some of the ink was gone after so many years, but she could still feel the groove where she had carved them. She smiled at the fond memories and at the dear friend who allowed her to take his bone when he died of old age.
                In the centre of the loom was a heart with a circular hole in it. It was where the braid would emerge.

                Holding the precious object, Kumihimo could feel all the braids she had already made and all the potential braids that waited to come into existence. She felt warmth bloom in her heart at the task at hand.

                Each notch corresponded at the same time to a time of the year, to a direction on earth and in the sky, and some rather obscure references to many other phenomenon and concepts. The weaving depended on very complex rules that she had discovered from experience. Actually the meaning weaved itself into the braid through a subtle interaction between her and Spirit. That way she didn’t have to bother about what to do or what notch to use as it would all unfold during the weaving.

                She stood up and walked outside. The day was still young and she had a lot to do. The weaving ceremony was an act of spontaneity, but it required some preparation. She put the loom on a round rock to dry in the Sun and went to examine the hanging threads. She had to choose carefully.

                #4270

                Yorath led the way down the forest path. Eleri followed, feeling no urge to rush, despite the sense of urgency. Rather, she felt a sense of urgency to linger, perhaps even to sit awhile on a rock beneath an old oak tree, to stop the pell mell rush of thoughts and suppositions and just sit, staring blankly, listening to the forest sounds and sniffing the mushroomy mulch beneath her feet.

                The compulsion to be alone increased. Unable to ignore it any longer, Eleri told Yorath that she would catch him up, she needed to go behind a bush for a moment, knowing quite well that there was no need for the excuse, but still, she didn’t feel like explaining. Talking, even thinking, had become tiring, exhausting even. She needed to sit, just sit.

                She watched his retreating back and breathed a sigh of relief when his form disappeared from view. Much as she loved her dear old friend, the absence of other humans was like a breath of air to the drowning. The rustlings of the living forest, the dappling shadows and busy missions of the insects was a different kind of busyness, far from still and never silent, not always slow or sedate, not even serene or pleasant always, but there was a restful coherence to the movements of the living forest.

                Leaning back into the tree trunk, her foot dislodged a rotten log from its resting place among the leaves ~ crisp and crunchy on the top, damp and decomposing beneath the surface ~ revealing the long slim ivory of bone contrasting sharply with the shades of brown.

                Bones. Eleri paused before leaning over to touch it gently at first, then gently smooth away the composting detritus covering it.

                Bones. She held it, feeling the hard dry texture peculiar to bones, loving the white colour which was more than white, a richer white than white, not bleached of colour, but full of the colours of white, and holding all of the colours of the story of it.

                The story of the bone, the bones. She knelt, carefully brushing the leaves aside. Bones never rested alone, she knew that. Close by she knew she would find more. She knew she would take them home with her, although she knew not why. Just that she always did. A smile flitted across her face as she recalled the horse bones she’d found once ~ an entire, perfect skeleton of a horse. What she wouldn’t have given to take the whole thing home with her, but it was impossible. Perfectly assembled, picked clean and sun bleached, resplendent in the morning sun, it was a thing of unimaginable beauty that morning, reclining on the hilltop. So she took as much of the spine as she could carry, and later wished she’d taken the skull instead. And never really wondered why she didn’t go back for more.

                But that was the thing with bones. You don’t go back. You take what you want, what you can carry, and leave the rest. But Eleri had to admit that she didn’t know why this was so.

                #4226

                The grass was covered with frost. Fox growled, curled up in his clothes. He put his tail on his nose to protect it from the cold morning air. He sneezed. The city clock chimed the eighth hour. His fine ear alerted him that the sound was still a tad out of phase, but it seemed better than the day before. It took a moment to his brain to understand what that meant.

                Rats! I fell asleep, Fox yelped. He tried to stood up on his four legs, only to get tangled in his pants and shirt. He growled again, unnerved at the poking of the branches of the bush under which he had waited… slept.

                He froze, alerted by noises from the house. He turned his ears straight toward the building in an attempt to pick up any useful information. His heart was beating fast. With each breath steam was escaping from his mouth. Someone unlatched the door. They were going out.

                Fox panicked at the idea of being seen that way. Agitation was not the best ingredient to facilitate shapeshifting, it could result in unfortunate entanglements of body parts. He breathed deeply and realized he had chosen his hideout not to be seen. He was out of sight. His heart still beating fast, but not quite as fast as before. Fox resumed his watch.

                A woman under a tattered burka got out of the house. She was holding a basket covered by a red gingham cloth. From the tinkling sound, Fox concluded she was carrying small glass bottles among other things. He wondered if that could be the potions that gnome and his strange creature talked about last night. His stomach growled, reminding him he hadn’t eaten in a day. The garden seemed a small and empty place to find food. He didn’t like shrews for breakfast. Furthermore, his previous targets certainly had time to get far away. There was no trace of them in the air or on the ground.

                Never mind. His curiosity picked, Fox decided to follow the woman. He considered his clothes on the ground for a moment. There was no way he could shapeshift all dressed up, and he didn’t want to get his butt frozen in that cold. Human form would have to wait. Still, he adjusted the color of his fur from fox orange to a darker tone before leaving the cover of his bush. He reminded himself to be careful, city people were not known to be fond of his kind except dead on their back.

                The woman was already outside the stonewall surrounding the garden. He caught her scent in the crisp morning air. The cold made him sneeze again. But he would not lose her and could follow from a distance. He went past a small statue before going out of the garden. It looked oddly familiar.

                #4224

                “Good morning Yorath! I had a most amazing dream last night,” said Eleri, while turning the mushrooms sizzling in the pan. “But I can’t recall a thing. Do you have a spell for dream recall?”

                “Of course I do! Put orange skin on your forehead and say carambar, that will do the trick,” he replied with a smile. If it works, he thought to himself, I can put it in my new spell book.

                “How handy that it’s orange season, I was just about to squeeze some for breakfast.” Eleri did as he suggested and placed the orange on her forehead. Immediately she had a vision of a fairy tale castle, silvery with many turrets. She was at a crossroads and a little bridge was in front of her leading to the castle. An old crone swathed in black skirts and shawl approached from the right, carrying a basket. The dream character pulled aside a red gingham cloth covering her basket and handed Eleri a large black book. Holding the book, she had an almost trippy sensation that the book was writhing or pulsing as if it’s stories would burst through the plain cover. And sure enough, as she held the book in her dream hands, while holding the cool orange to the middle of her forehead, she started to get flashes of recall.

                #4203
                TracyTracy
                Participant

                  Aunt Idle:

                  My work was done. The new guru had found her feet and was up and running. My behind the scenes supporting role was over, so I booked a flight back home. I called Bert and told him and he informed me that Mater had been grumbling about being left on her own and how quiet it was. I was under no illusion that she’d welcome me back with open arms ~ not outwardly, anyway. The first thing she’ll do is start complaining about the racket and the chaos, or so I thought. Such is life with the aged ones.

                  So I was astonished when Mater rushed out on to the porch when my taxi pulled up outside the Inn, and flabbergasted when Bert rushed out after her holding a large box. Stunned by the strange sight of such animation, I simply watched open mouthed as Bert ran back into the house, clutching the box, as Mater furiously admonished him and gave him a shove, looking over her shoulder at me. As if I couldn’t see them!

                  The taxi driver opened the boot of the car and handed me my suitcase. I thanked him and settled my bill, and slowly approached Mater on the porch.

                  “I’m home!” I called gaily.

                  Mater giggled nervously (giggling at her age, I ask you! and wearing a pink floral babygro, it was almost obscene) and ran a withered hand through her sparse locks.

                  “What’s Bert got in that box?” I asked, in what I hoped was a neutral and cordial manner.

                  “What box? Er, nothing! There is nothing important about that box, I expect it’s just some old boring rubbish,” Mater replied, a trifle hastily, and altogether unconvincingly. “You must be parched after your journey, I’ll go and put the kettle on.” And with that she rushed inside, failing completely in her vapid attempt to allay my suspicions.

                  One thing was true though, I was parched, and Bert and the mysterious box would have to wait until after a cup of tea.

                  #4200

                  When Eleri’s little dog started coughing and wheezing again her first reaction was to snap at him. Irritating though it inevitably was, once again she realized she’d been holding her breath somehow, or probably more accurately, holding her energy. Or holding everyone elses, like a brick layers hod carrier, weighed down with blocks from other peoples walls.

                  “It’s too hot in here, come outside,” she said to the scruffy mongrel. The cozy warmth of the wood stoves had become stifling. She slipped through the door into the cool night.

                  Breathe, she said to herself, momentarily forgetting the gasping dog. Her hunched shoulders descended jerkily as she inhaled the sodden air, wondering about ozone or ions, what was it people said about the air after the rain? Whatever it was, it was good for something, good for the heart and soul of mortal humans.

                  Feeling better with every breath, Eleri noticed the olive branches rustling wetly overhead. The olive tree had been planted too close to the fig tree ~ wasn’t that always the way, forgetting how large things grow when one plants a seed or a sapling. As the old fig tree had broadened it’s sheltering canopy, the olive sapling had reached out an an angle to find the sun, and sprinted upwards in a most un olive like manner. This reminded her of the straight little sapling story, which had always irritated her. What was commendable about a row of straight little soldier saplings anyway? All neat and tidy and oh so boring, none of them stepping out of line with a twist here or a gnarl there. No character! But the olive tree, in it’s race towards the light, leaned over the gable end of the dwelling as if spreading it’s arms protectively over the roof. A regimental straight sapling would have simply withered in among the fig leaves, whereas this one had the feel of a grandfatherly embrace of benevolent support.

                  What was it she’d heard about trees and oxygen? They exhaled the stuff that we wanted and inhaled the stuff we didn’t want, that was about as technical as she could muster, and it was enough. She breathed in tandem with the trembling rain sparkled leaves. In. And out. In, and out. Deeper breaths. Damn, it was good! That was good air to be breathing, what with the rain and the trees doing their thing. And there for the taking, no strings attached.

                  When the oven timer interrupted her sojourn in the night air, Eleri noticed that the little dog had stopped coughing. On her way back inside, she noticed the new mermaids patiently awaiting a coat or two of sea green paint and wondered if she would ever find a dragon to replicate. She was sure they’d be popular, if only she could find one.

                  #4197
                  F LoveF Love
                  Participant

                    MATER

                    Bert seems to be digging a very large hole. I mean, good grief, it’s just a veggie garden. I don’t think my cabbages warrant all that effort. I pull open the window—the latch wobbles precariously on its single screw—and call out to him.

                    “What are you doing, Bert? Digging a grave or something?”

                    My humour is clearly lost on him. He glances over in my direction, distractedly, before placing his spade on the ground. He then kneels down in the dirt and leaning right inside the hole begins scrabbling with his hands.

                    How odd!

                    I pull a jacket on over my pink floral onesie. The onesie was a birthday gift from the girls and was accompanied by rather a lot of silliness and giggling. However I was privately rather taken with my gift and with summer over and a cool chill in the air it was very handy to put on in the mornings. Completing my ensemble with an old pair of gumboots by the back doorstep, I go and join Bert in the garden.

                    “What’s that, Bert? What’s that you’ve found in there?”

                    “I’m not sure yet,” he replied. At least, I think that’s what he said. It was hard to hear him when he was hanging upside down in a hole.

                    I crouch down beside him, no mean feat at my age, and take a look.

                    All I can see are some bones.

                    “What is it? A dog or something?”

                    “Too big for a dog.”

                    “Oh my goodness!” I gasp. “Are those … people bones?”

                    Bert gently extricates an object from the dirt and pulling himself back up he perches down beside me. “Not unless they have a beak for a nose,” he says, gently dusting off the dirt and holding it up for me to see.

                    It was a giant skull. Like a strange giant bird.

                    “Dragon skull,” says Bert with a satisfied smile.

                    #4139
                    Jib
                    Participant

                      “What do we do with this ?” asked Roberto.
                      Felicity removed her sunglasses and looked at the gardener appreciatively. He was wearing his usual dungarees, with no shirt. She then looked at the mannequin covered in maps he was holding in his arms.

                      “Put it back in the attic”, said Liz.

                      “Don’t tell me you still do collage”, said her Mother. “I could understand, barely, when you were ten years old, but now… Put it in the trash”, she looked at the gardener longer than necessary, “whoever you are.” She turned to her daughter still spread in the sofa. “What’s his name? Are you two… ?”

                      “I’m sure Leon and his twin are enough, don’t you think ?” said Liz bitterly. She felt possessive about Roberto, she knew it was silly but she had to get hold on to something before her mother could strip her of her life. An idea began to emerge in her feverish mind. There had been recent articles about a new game attracting swarms of players, she would ask Godfrey to make signs indicating there was a nest of those Pookemoon in her garden, and maybe in the house. People should certainly be more easy to get rid off than rats and roaches…

                      #4109

                      Jeremy beamed at Ed, holding what looked like a foiled contraption vaguely reminiscent of a sun oven to his face.

                      “Get that out of my mustache, and tell me what it is!” Ed had no patience this days where reality was still dangerously shifty, and Bea nowhere to be found.

                      “That’s the solution to locate your patient zero, Mr Ed! I’ve reconfigured your Transfocal Thingy and made a few improvements on the wirigly compensator and…”

                      Ed interrupted “I have no idea what you are talking about, son. Make it plain English before I start doubting about you having been rebooted…”

                      “Mr Ed, Sir, you know, the device that your friend Pr Blaze Ingle gave you before he was rebooted to a goat-herder in the Andalusian mountains…”

                      “Yes, I’m aware, the Transfocal Thingy, that is helping us all to retain more or less our identity, of course I remember! What about it? Don’t tell me you’ve broken it!”

                      “On the contrary! I’ve amplified it. And with this drone connected to it, we can scan larger areas. We’ll find her, Sir. Wherever she’d hiding, we’ll find her.”

                      “And end her and this madness…” Ed twirled his mustache lost in deep thoughts. It was good to have his Team back, to take care of all the little things. More or less.

                      #4009
                      TracyTracy
                      Participant

                        As Prune spoke the magic words releasing her aunt from marbledom, an unforeseen chain reaction of uncrusting began. One by one the concrete statues and animals that Idle had been collecting became more yielding, less rigid. They didn’t all start gallivanting around at once, it was a slow process depending on the length of time they had been solid.

                        The buddha by the fish pond had had his knees bent for so long it would be some time before he could straighten them, but it was with great joy that he raised a hand from his lap to scratch the fly droppings off the tip of his nose. He was just about to make a remark about foolish idle people and wise diligent ones when it occurred to him that he’d been completely idle for quite some time, and that it hadn’t been his fault. The unaccustomed questioning of his rather rigid beliefs accelerated the uncrusting process, and he was able to turn his head to see the odd looking cat approaching, but unable to move his arm quickly enough to stop it spraying him with piss.

                        You have no idea how long I’ve been holding that, said the cat, somewhat telepathically.

                        A loud gravelly sounding laugh echoed across the pond, coming from the direction of the green man plaque on the wall. The unfamiliar cackle drew Clove out from the kitchen to see who it was.

                        “I have so much to say!” the green man cleared his throat, spitting out some moss that had become stuck between his teeth, “And I’ve waited so long to say it! You there, you! Don’t go away!” The green man immediately realized his predicament. He had a face but no body. He would have to wait until an audience came to him to listen.

                        But Clove was interested and inched closer. She had just been researching Dionysus for a project; what a fortuitous coincidence that a replica of him had come to life. She would be able to interview him for her report. She’d just read that “It is perhaps an indication of the Green Man’s power as an archetype that he was able to transfer so seamlessly from one culture and one set of beliefs to another.”

                        This was exactly the angle she was after.

                        #3977
                        TracyTracy
                        Participant

                          HELP ME!” Liz shouted over her shoulder, while simultaneously grabbing the back of the gardeners trousers with one hand, and attempting to floogle the phrase stickum lute putty on her pocket device with the other hand. What in tarnation did it mean? Probably some ancient tribal voodoo Finnley had picked up during her sojourn in the nether regions of the planet.

                          Roberto struggled to escape the vice like grip on his belt, but Liz’s grip was firm. Godfrey charged across the lawn like like a wild boar to assist with the detention of the errant gardener and gripped Roberto’s shoulder firmly. The sticky shreds of paper in Godfrey’s hand stuck to the gardeners denim shirt like glue. Roberto wrenched himself free, sending Godfrey flying into the herbaceous border, and leaving Liz holding an empty pair of jeans in her hand. Focusing on the information now showing on her pocket information device ~ an aboriginal dreamwalker teleport code ~ it was a moment before Liz realized that she was no longer detaining the gardener but merely holding his trousers. Of Roberto, there was no sign.

                          Godfrey, sitting in amongst the delphiniums, was looking as pale as Finnley after the cucumber mask. Although Liz had missed the sight of the gardener sans trews, Godfrey had not.

                          “An imposter!” he cried. “That was no Roberto, that was Roberta Slack! A WOMAN!”

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