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December 22, 2024 at 9:40 pm #7703
In reply to: The Precious Life and Rambles of Liz Tattler
“Shades of PUNK, Liz’, I meant, shades of punk, of course.” Godfrey vociferated in exaggeration.
With all the agitation that Liz’ had to endure with the botapocalypse she was worried about, Godfrey couldn’t have her more distracted about acquired tastes of colours. Liz might have not liked pink, but pink liked Liz with a passion.
While she was out of earshot, he still couldn’t help but wink and whispered to her shadow conspiratorially “and don’t worry, your secret is safe with me.”
He jumped when Finnley smirked in his back.
“What have you been doing, lurking in the shadows?”
“I don’t do lurking, that’s called discretion. Hardly what I would call all that hot pink froufrou that I found in the wardrobes and took for a needed dry-clean. Don’t thank me. Well, nobody does, anyway.”
Seeing the surprised face of Godfrey, a million thoughts raced through her mind; She shrugged “I’m not sure I want to know about all these secrets. Now let me do my cleaning and scurry away.”
December 3, 2024 at 7:51 am #7636In reply to: Quintessence: Reversing the Fifth
It was cold in Kent, much colder than Elara was used to at home in the Tuscan olive groves, but Mrs Lovejoy kept the guest house warm enough. On site at Samphire Hoe was another matter, the wind off the sea biting into her despite the many layers of clothing. It had been Florian’s idea to take the Mongolian hat with her. Laughing, she’d replied that it might come in handy if there was a costume party. Trust me, you’re going to need it, he’d said, and he was right. It had been a present from Amei, many years ago, but Elara had barely worn it. It wasn’t often that she found herself in a place cold enough to warrant it.
In a fortuitous twist of fate, Florian had asked if he could come and stay with her for awhile to find his feet after the tumultuous end of a disastrous relationship. It came at a time when Elara was starting to realise that there was too much work for her alone keeping the old farmhouse in order. Everyone wants to retire to the country but nobody thinks of all the work involved, at an age when one prefers to potter about, read books, and take naps.
Florian was a long lost (or more correctly never known) distant relative, a seventh cousin four times removed on her paternal side. They had come into contact while researching the family, comparing notes and photographs and family anecdotes. They became friends, finding they had much in common, and Elara was pleased to have him come to stay with her. Likewise, Florian was more than willing to help around the beautiful old place, and found it conducive to his writing. He spent the mornings gardening, decorating or running errands, and the afternoons tapping away at the novel he’d been inspired to start, sitting at the old desk in front of the French windows.
If it hadn’t been for Florian, Elara wouldn’t have accepted the invitation to join the chalk project. He had settled in so well, already had a working grasp of Italian, and got on well with her neighbours. She could leave him to look after everything and not worry about a thing.
Pulling the hat down over her ears, Elara ventured out into the early November chill. Mrs Lovejoy was coming up the path to the guesthouse, having been out to the corner shop. “I say, that’s a fine hat you have there, that’ll keep your cockles warm!” Mrs Lovejoy was bareheaded, wearing only a cardigan.
“It was a gift,” Elara told her, “I haven’t worn it much. A friend bought it for me years ago when we were in Mongolia.”
“Very nice, I’m sure,” replied the landlady, trying to remember where Mongolia was.
“Yes, she was nice,” Elara said wistfully. “We lost contact somehow.”
“Ah yes, well these things happen,” Mrs Lovejoy said. “People come into your life and then they go. Like my Bert…”
“Must go or I’ll be late!” Elara had already heard all about Bert a number of times.
December 1, 2024 at 8:49 pm #7629In reply to: Quintessence: Reversing the Fifth
If everything went according to plan she would arrive in Paris at 10:39 tomorrow morning, and with a bit of luck the ferry crossing this afternoon wouldn’t be too rough. Thank god I don’t have to fly anywhere. Elara had a good feeling about the trip. To be so conveniently situated near Samphire Hoe, close to the Dover ferry ports to France, when the invitation to meet in Paris had been suggested, seemed a good sign. The old dear at the Churchill Guest House had agreed to keep her self catering suite empty for when she came back, so she didn’t need to concern herself with all the stuff she seemed to have accumulated in just a few short months.
Elara zipped up the small travelling case. The taxi wasn’t due for another 17 minutes but she was ready, so she went downstairs to stand outside.
Samphire Hoe. Nobody would have expected to find that. Elara shook her head wonderingly every time she thought about it. It would be good to have a few days away, think about something else.
November 20, 2024 at 9:21 pm #7609In reply to: The Incense of the Quadrivium’s Mystiques
“You! I never expected to see you here!” What was Thomas Cromwell doing in the colosseum in the year 1507? “Oh, of course, you were in Italy…what on earth are you wearing?” Truella asked, in some confusion. Never had she seen such an elaborate codpiece, and nobody else was wearing one.
He took his feathered cap off and ran a hand through his hair. “I’ve been to the very gates of purgatory trying to get back to Austin Friars, I unintentionally left Malove there.”
“In what year?” Truella was aghast. “How long has she been there? Who is she with? Is she safe?”
“There is no time to lose, how do I make this ~ this ~ thing go where and when I want?”
“Never mind that now, you had better come with us,” Trella was looking around to see where the others were. “We’ll all have to go. What’s the weather like? What are we going to do about clothes?”
“Clothes?” asked Jeezel, sneaking up behind them through some exotic foreign bushes, “Just you leave that to me! I’ve already found a marvellous museum costume shop. Did you get that codpiece there?” she said to Cromwell. ” I saw one in there similar to that, but with less padding.”
“Here you are,” announced Frella, suddenly appearing out of nowhere with her arms draped in costumes. “No time for shopping, so I did a quick spell.”
Why didn’t I think of just doing a spell? Truella wondered, not for the first time.
You never do was the unspoken reply that entered the scene with the appearance of Eris, armed with the approriate spells. “Right then. Here we go.”
November 18, 2024 at 8:46 am #7603In reply to: The Incense of the Quadrivium’s Mystiques
“That was such a pleasant trip!” Truella said with a happy sigh, “First time I’ve ever been on a coach full of Italians, but weren’t they fun! Especially that Ravioli dude.”
“I think you mean Giovanni,” Frella said with her usual eye roll.
“Giovanni, yeah, he said he’d take me on a time travel tour of the Colosseum.”
“That sounds awful! You can’t be serious!” Jeezel said with a look of horror.
“No, not back to when it was in use, but back through the ages of its abandonment. It sounds ever so interesting. Apparently there were flowers and plants growing in there that nobody had seen before, they reckoned the seeds must have come in with the exotic animals.”
“Now that does sound interesting,” Eris said, “I wonder if we could time travel back and collect some herbs and seeds to use in our spells.”
“Well we’re supposed to be on holiday, not thinking about work,” Truella glared at Eris, “But I don’t see why not. Giovanni said there was a hermitage for pilgrims inside the colosseum, and it was covered in vines, a botanical paradise in the midst of the city, he said. We could take a picnic!”
“Yeah, that does sound good,” Frella was warming to the idea.
November 13, 2024 at 8:52 pm #7594In reply to: The Incense of the Quadrivium’s Mystiques
“With full pay AND a bonus?” Truella was incredulous. “For all of us?”
“Yes, regardless of past performance,” Frella said pursing her lips.
“Nobody can fault my performances,” Jeezel said with a toss of her magenta feather boa. “Where shall we go, Eris?”
A smile slowly spreading across her face, Eris replied, “We’re on holiday. We don’t have to decide anything yet.”
November 5, 2024 at 1:14 pm #7583In reply to: The Incense of the Quadrivium’s Mystiques
Frella rolled her eyes. What were the odds of Truella turning up now!
“Well, don’t look so pleased to see me,” Truella said sarcastically. “I could have drowned you know, if Thomas hadn’t saved me. Are you going to introduce me to your friend?”
Frella looked helplessly at Oliver. “Perhaps you’d better go now, it’s all getting too complicated.”
“My good lady, would you curtail my pleasure at this unexpected meeting with a nephew I knew not existed?” Thomas interrupted, taking control of the situation, in as much as an out of control situation could be managed.
“My good man,” Frella replied tartly, “Would you curtail my pleasure with your nephew?”
“Now, now,” butted in Truella, trying to get a handle on the situation, “Surely nobody needs to have any pleasure curtailed. But Thomas has to get the boat back quickly, so I suggest someone explains to him who his nephew is. Then he can get back to the Thames. And I’ll walk back to your cottage, Frella, and borrow some dry clothes if you don’t mind, and then you can get on with….it, in peace.”
“Get on with what exactly!” Frella retorted, blushing furiously. “Oliver, why don’t you go back with your uncle, you know where the Thames is, don’t you? It just seems easier that way.”
Oliver laughed at the very idea of not knowing where the Thames was. “But my great great grand uncle Thomas died before I was born. I know of him, but he knows not of me. Well, he does now, admittedly.”
“So your name is Oliver,” mused Thomas, “Oliver Cromwell. And by the look of your doublet and hose, you’re a wealthy man. We have much to talk about. Pray step into the boat, my good sir, and we’ll find a way to get you back to your own time later. We must make haste for the sake of my boatman, Rafe.”
And with that they were off in a puff of river mist.
October 24, 2024 at 7:56 am #7568In reply to: The Incense of the Quadrivium’s Mystiques
The year 480 AD. It was there hovering in her mind the moment she woke up the morning after Eris had mentioned the DNA spell idea. 480 AD. But why? And it seemed strangely familiar, as if she’d dreamed of that date before. Mumbling the date over and over, Truella pushed the bed covers back, noted the welcome slight chill of the October morning, and made her way blindly to the kitchen to make coffee. 480 AD. Why, though?
Eris’s change of tune yesterday about the paperwork had given her a slight inward chuckle, but it was a good sign. And Eris had been right: Truella did like the DNA idea. At first she’d wondered if she would find something containing DNA. Then she reminded herself that she herself contained DNA available to use. But what was the year 480 AD to do with it?
Taking her steaming mug of coffee outside, Truella sat down under the porch and lit a cigarette. Too late for Romans but then what was next after Romans? It would have made more sense if it was 1480 AD, when Cromwell was born.
Oh, but what an idea! Yes! The DNA of Cromwell! She was reminded of the pieces of Hannibals tunic, and the efficacy of that spell. If they could find a bit of that old tunic, they could surely time travel back to gather some DNA from old Thomas. Truella giggled, imagining herself appearing in Cromwell’s chamber, armed with a cotton swab. “If you please, my Lord, open wide, this will only take a moment.”
He would rub his eyes, wondering if the fever had returned. What was this unseemly wench doing in here, bearing an uncanny resemblance to Lizzie, his dead wife. “Open wide,” she would say, for all the world as if she was the one giving the orders. “My lady, if you please to explain your purpose?” he would replied calmly, rather amused at the incomprehensible interlude.
“Well if you must know, we need some of your DNA. Yes, yes, I know you don’t know what that is yet, I’ve come from the future you see, and we know a lot more. Well, that’s not strictly true or I wouldn’t be here now. We know more about some things, but other things haven’t changed much. It’s the sea of paperwork we’re drowning in. Nobody could have more paperwork than you, my Lord Cromwell, but you have a particularly efficient way of dealing with it.”
“Are you referring to the Tower and the …”
“Gosh, no! No, we don’t plan to execute anyone. We just need a bit, a tiny bit, of your DNA to use in a spell…”
Suddenly Cromwell understood who this woman was. He didn’t need to call for the man who dealt with postcards from the future: everyone knows that Cromwell never forgets any paperwork he’s ever seen. In the future they called it photographic memory, but of course it wasn’t called that in his time.
“You, my lady, are one of those witches from the future, are you not? And why, pray, would I be willing to assist with witchcraft?”
“Well, why not?” retorted Truella. “You won’t be around to be executed for heresy, you were already..” She clapped her hand to her mouth. He didn’t know about that yet, obviously.
Cromwell merely raised a sardonic eyebrow. “I don’t want to know when,” he said calmly. He knew his days were numbered.
“Now, there a number of ways we can collect a bit of your DNA, sir, any bodily fluid will do,” Truella said, and then blushed deeply. Well, why not? she asked herself, and then wondered, What if he hasn’t had a bath for six months?
October 4, 2024 at 3:05 am #7559In reply to: The Incense of the Quadrivium’s Mystiques
The next day dawned gray and drizzly. Frella sat at the small wooden table in her cozy cottage, cradling a steaming mug of pumpkin soup left over from last night’s dinner. Her thoughts swirled around the mysterious postcards and their puzzling implications.
A sudden gust of wind rattled the window. Frella turned just in time to see a postcard slip through the slightly ajar window and float softly to the floor. She raced to the window and peered out but there was nobody to be seen.
She bent down to pick up the card. The picture on the front was a haunting image of a labyrinthine garden, overgrown and twisted, with shadows stretching across the path like grasping fingers. Were the shadows moving towards her? Heart racing, she flipped the card over.
In elegant script, the message read: “In the garden of secrets, the past blooms anew. Seek what is hidden beneath the roots.”
A chill ran down Frella’s spine. This card felt different. The picture of the garden resonated deeply, stirring a sense that secrets from her own life were waiting to be unearthed. The air seemed to thrum with potential as she contemplated the image before her.
July 19, 2024 at 12:26 pm #7536In reply to: The Incense of the Quadrivium’s Mystiques
The rainbow was neon bright, one end disappearing behind a spinney in the distance, and the other end landing squarely in the middle of the glamping pods. A good sign! thought Truella, the first of the coven to arrive. For a moment she imagined herself digging a hole right there, and finding the elusive pot of gold. I wouldn’t be able to do that in a fancy hotel. For once, Truella was happy with Austreberthe’s choice. A week or two in a green field sounded relaxing, refreshing. So much more to her taste than the endless fitted carpets, closed windows, and artifically controlled air blasting out of metal grilles in hotels.
Taking a deep breath of cool fresh air, she surveyed the site before checking into reception. The neighbouring fields were full of cows, perfect for her to practice her Bubona spells on before she set up her Goddess Spell Booth. The Goddess spell tents were to be open in the evenings, after the games each day, along with other stalls selling handicrafts, homemade cakes and jams, wines and potions, trinkets and souvenirs, and all the other tat that people on holiday enjoyed browsing. Obviously the coven would have a stall selling incense. No doubt Austreberthe would have hatched some hard sell plan for that.
Inside the reception office, Truella pinged the bell and waited for someone to attend. The registration book was open on the counter and Truella craned her neck to read the names on the list. She planned to ask for a pod in a far corner, near the hedgerow. It might make it easier to slip out unnoticed, if she should have a mind to do so. The door behind the counter opened and a young man appeared, smiling a welcome. But not before Truella had seen the name on the list. She sucked her breath in sharply. Malove! Nobody was expecting her. Did Austreberthe know?
“Welcome to Finnegan’s Farm Glampsite, I’m Liam,” said the young man, pushing long mousy hair out of his eyes, “You’ve a booking I take it, because we’re fully booked up for the next fortnight. Because of the Games, you see.”
Replying that she did, Truella asked for a pod in the furthest corner. Liam looked at a list and frowned. “The corners are all taken, I’m afraid. But I tell you what,” he said, “As you’re the first to arrive I’ll swap your pod, let’s see…” He scanned the list. “Ah yes, the late booking. I can put you in the one we’ve assigned to Mrs …Malone I think it says, and put her in yours.”
“Thank you very much, Liam,” Truella said as he handed her a key with a big wooden tag with the number 33 etched on it.
“I’ll carry your bags over and show you where it is, follow me.”
June 21, 2024 at 8:17 am #7512In reply to: The Incense of the Quadrivium’s Mystiques
“If you ask me,” said Trella, although nobody had, “If anyone wants the merger to fail, it’ll be someone from the Cloisters.”
“Seems like none of us want it, why single them out?” asked Frella. “Well,” she added, glancing at Eris, “Not all of us maybe but for most of us it’s just a hassle. Just more work, and no real benefits for the likes of us, anyway.”
“Think about it, Frell. Sure, it’s just a nuisance for the witches and the nuns, but not enough of a bother to play with fire meddling with far grander schemes. That’d be way out of the depth of most of us, I’m sure. But there’s more going on at the Cloisters than meets the eye. There are other, er, things here, things that don’t want change.”
“Like what?” asked Eris in a doubtful tone.
“I don’t know but I can feel it. Can’t you? Eris, you’re so busy looking at spread sheets and finances you are losing your second sight! The undercurrents are bubbling up so much we’ll drown before long! We’re all looking at each other with suspicion, and meanwhile….”
“You mean we can trust the Morticians?” asked Jeezel hopefully. Eris glared at her.
“Maybe,” Trella said. “Maybe. We don’t know anything for sure yet. But I suggest we stop looking at the nuns, I mean the ordinary rank and file nuns, and the morticians with suspicion and focus on the place itself. There’s a long dark history to this place. And if you ask me, Brother Bartolo knows something.”
“Surely he’s not behind the whole thing!”
“Not behind the whole thing, no, but he knows something. And the gardener, Brother Babbit. Sassafras told me there’s nothing Brother Babbit doesn’t know about the history of this place, but that he only wants to talk about the plants, you know, the local wildlife and such. And,” Truella paused dramatically, “Sandra dropped something out while we were smoking weed in the orchard after the reception. She said Brother Bartolo said he’d seen the Sisters of the Sacred Sepulchre roaming around in the cellar, waiting for orders!”
“The sisters of the friggen what?” Jeezel sighed. Not more characters to convolute everything even more! “Roaming around in the cellars? Oh come on!”
“And that’s not all,” Truella lowered her voice to a whisper. “Sassafras said something about them being reanimated.”
Finally, Eris started taking Truella seriously. “Reanimation? I don’t like the sound of that. We’d better find out as much as we can about the sisters of the cellars, who are they, I mean who were they, have they been reanimated before, and what were the circumstances.”
“Right ho, I’ll just boogle it, shall I?” Jeezel said sarcastically.
Eris rolled her eyes. “No need for the snark. The clues will be here, right here at the Cloisters. We need to check the library, look in every room for clues, check out all the tapestries and paintings, speak to Brother Bartolo and Brother Babbit, but without making them suspicious, mind! Just pretend an interest in history, no mention of the merger! Keep it light! And keep it light with the morticians, but keep it superficial, until we know more. And then…,” Eris looked at each of them. “we need to go down to the cellars. I suggest we do that together.”
“We need Frella to come for that,” Truella stated the obvious. The others murmured their agreement.
June 13, 2024 at 9:32 am #7472In reply to: The Incense of the Quadrivium’s Mystiques
When Truella had stopped reacting, she had another look over the memo, noticing the location of the preposterous sounding coven they were to associate with. She had assumed that it would be in the north, or at least in Madrid, but was astonished to discover they were based very close to her village. She wondered why she had never heard of them. She supposed that they did their money minded business elsewhere and were merely based here, hidden in the cork woods, masquerading as one of those ghastly upmarket hotels for corrupt politicians. One could only see the distinctive tower from the roads, as the old convent was hidden deep in the woods. Nobody Truella knew had ever had any money to get through the gates and have a closer look.
This gave Truella an idea. What an opportunity! It would give her a way in.
Actually, I think it might be a great idea, girls. Let’s give it our best shot. Austreberthe has my support on this.
Eris, Frella and Zez nearly dropped their gadgets when they read Truella’s latest message. Frella was the first to respond.
Go on then, tell us. What changed your mind?
Location, location, location! Truella replied. Check out where they’re based!
After a few minutes, Frella replied.
You better spill the beans and tell us what you’re planning. That is, if you want us to cooperate with you and go along with this latest trashy money grabbing fiasco in the making. I thought our plan was to have the summer off? What does the location mean to you?
Speak for yourself, Frella, Eris replied, rather miffed. At least she’s going to go along with it, for Flove’s sake, let’s just do what we’ve been asked to do without complaining for once!
I’m with you, Eris, Jeezel piped up, I quite fancy a flamenco puffer jacket. Or a nice knitted sombrero. And we can visit Truella while we’re there on business.
Outnumbered, Frella sighed. I still think Truella should explain. Explain fully. And don’t expect me anytime soon, either. I have to solve the mystery of the camphor chest first.
June 11, 2024 at 5:26 am #7466In reply to: The Incense of the Quadrivium’s Mystiques
“What’s so bad about the Middle Ages, Eris?” asked Truella, bridling. “I’ve been saying all along, we need to return to our roots, get back to the real thing, ditch the modern corporate world that has nothing to do with witchcraft.”
“It won’t be all lutes and jesters, you know,” Frella said with a frown. “I think you’re romanticising it. They did all sorts of dreadful things for money, even back then.”
“Gorgeous pointy hats though, Frell, and richly embroidered gowns and robes, men in tights and pointy shoes….”
Eris glared at Jez. “Who’s romanticising now? You’re forgetting the rank smell of unwashed bodies, the foul rotten food..”
“We’re not literally going back in time!” Truella said in exasperation. “Just adopting a different outlook, we can still wash for Flove’s sake! I don’t like the sound of Austreberthe though,” she added. “Sounds like a character out of a 1940’s German coven of the worst possible sort.”
“That’s a step too far, Truella,” Frella gasped. “You can’t say things like that about people, especially your superiors.”
“What do you mean can’t, I just did,” Truella retorted hotly. “And that right there is the problem, can’t you see? Nobody is superior! Anyway, how do we know Malove appointed her? Maybe she’s just seized the opportunity, a chancer in a power vacuum, and here you all are, just drooling at the opportunity to kowtow to yet another old dragon past her sell by date.”
“You’ll end up in the stocks on the village green, you will, being pelted with tomatos by the peasants, if she hears you.” Jez was examining her nails. “Did they have nail varnish in the Middle Ages?”
June 10, 2024 at 10:05 pm #7464In reply to: The Incense of the Quadrivium’s Mystiques
“The world is vast, and we are not alone in our quest for magical mastery. We will forge new partnerships!” Malove’s voice had reached fever pitch. She had expanded her map, showing potential allies and strategic locations across the globe. Reactions in the audience varied, but there was an overwhelming unspoken consensus of a growing rebellion towards the unsettling increase in Malove’s dictatorial ways.
Perhaps nobody will ever know for sure whose private spell did the trick, or whether it was the combined effort that brought about such an unexpected chain of events. Maybe it was none of those things, and just the way things worked out.
The vast world that Malove had cried out heard her call and sucked her forthwith into the steamy depths of a hitherto unknown equatorial location in search of potential allies. An unexpected invitation from a long lost cousin, it was said, although nobody in the coven knew for sure. There was more lively interest in the coven and more communication between the witches during those days when Malove disappeared without trace than ever before.
On the twelfth day after her disappearance, the cryptic messages started arriving. On the 15th day, experts were examining the selfies for signs of tampering and pronouncing them to be be true images.
It wasn’t easy to imagine Malove swooning in her tropical lovers arms under parrot filled jungle trees, sheathed in gauzy crumpled linen and with a vapid expression of a Cartland character, but the photos kept coming.
It seemed too bizarre, too good to be true, when Malove sent a voice message in her unmistakable voice, but with an uncharacteristic lazy, sultry tone.
“Darlings, you won’t beleive it. I’ve fallen in love! I’m taking an indefinite leave of absence.”
April 27, 2024 at 6:28 pm #7440In reply to: The Incense of the Quadrivium’s Mystiques
“Not another one!” exclaimed Truella. “Another time and money wasting conference in another bloody castle!”
Eris sighed. “It’s a party, a birthday party, not a conference. You know, one of those fun things that people do for entertainment.”
“If Malove planned it there is bound to be a catch. It’s another money making pushy sales thing, I bet.”
“Actually,” Frella ventured timidly, “You’re right, it’s not just a birthday party.”
“How would you know?” Jez was blunt.
Frella stammered nervously, “Well I, er, I overheard a snatch of conversation, you see…”
Jeezel gave her a piercing look and said “And? What did you overhear?”
“Something about the pink spider. We have to find it for some reason, before the others do. Well of course Malove was going to tell us,” Frella rolled her eyes at Truella, “But not until we got there, at the last minute. And no, I don’t know why. And I don’t know what the pink spider is, either. But maybe we can find out before we get there.”
“What’s the castle and where is it?” asked Truella.
“It’s the Flossy Liar Chateau,” replied Eris, “In France somewhere. Maybe you can find out some of the history, Tru. Frella, do some research on the botanical garden. And Jez, the costumes…”
“Getting a bit bossy, aint she,” Jez said to nobody in particular, and to Eris she asked sweetly, “And you, dear? What will you be researching?”
“Why, the legends of witchcraft, obviously. There are bound to be some legends and witchcraft.”
April 12, 2024 at 6:45 am #7428In reply to: The Incense of the Quadrivium’s Mystiques
An unexpected result (or was it an intentional one?) of the octobus ride was a profound appreciation for the arrival at the destination. Not one of the witches had been truly looking forward to the event, but when they entered the building they were deeply grateful for the smooth hard floors and walls and sharp minimalism, if that is what the sparse clean decor was called.
“This place is sorely in need of some steampunk hats,” remarked Truella. “And some Victorian clothes.”
“Beats the hell out of that gross octobus, though,” Jezeel said, who was swanning grandly around the large entrance foyer, her boots making a neat thud rather than a revolting sucking sound.
“I rather like it,” said Frella, “Steampunk hats wouldn’t fit in here at all. Are you sure that party is being held here?” For a moment, she felt a ray of hope. She was feeling that it might be possible to remain unnoticed and unbothered in the vast clean space if she sat somewhere looking serenely vacant and unapproachable.
Spotting the shiny black grand piano in the corner, Jezeel glided majestically over to it and hopped onto the back of it, striking a glamourous pose. Naturally everyone took flattering photos of her as was expected.
Eris had rushed off to find a lavatory, and eventually emerged holding a strange awkward bundle.
“What on earth is that and where did you find it?” Frella noticed the look of alarm on Eris’s face. Truella was still taking photos of Jez from various angles, much to Jezreel’s delight.
“What does it bloody look like!” Eris said in an exasperated tone, “It’s a baby, someone left it in the loo! Go and ask at the desk, find out who lost a baby. I think it’s nappy needs changing.”
Frella went off to ask, returning shortly with surprising news. “There is nobody checked in here with a baby, Eris. Nobody knows whose it is. Here, give it to me, the poor thing.”
Eris handed over the smelly bundle gratefully.
I can stay in my room with this baby, Frella thought, It will be the perfect excuse not to go to the party.
February 20, 2024 at 2:49 pm #7380In reply to: The Incense of the Quadrivium’s Mystiques
The second coming had been anticipated for many years, although few but the most fanatic of the American sects expected it to actually happen, and they, of course, expected it to happen in their own country. Certainly, nobody expected him to be 30 meters high weighing over 600 tons. Naturally people were sceptical but when he turned the Rodrigo de Freitas lake into wine, even the most scientific minds were unable to find an explanation.
“We had better get the hell out of town,” Frigella said, “Before anyone realizes it was our spell to reverse the effects of the termitation honey on Truella.”
“Have I got time to go for a swim in the wine lake first,” asked Jezeel, “I mean, it would be such a shame to miss that once in a lifetime experience, and I’m sure it will do wonders for my complexion.”
“You’re right, it would be a shame to miss it,” agreed Truella, “But are you sure the spell is stable, I don’t want to turn to stone again while I’m swimming.”
“Well, I think we should leave town as soon as possible” Frigella said, her pale forehead wrinking into a little frown.
“Look, Malove isn’t even up yet after stuffing herself with that smoked hippo last night, if she wakes up before we get back she’ll just think we’ve gone out for coffee. We’re supposed to be having a little holiday. Anyway I put some sleeping pills in her portion, she won’t wake up until well after lunch. We have plenty of time and it’s only two blocks from here. Oh come on, where’s your sense of adventure?”
“Well come on then” Eris said, “But let’s get going. Don’t start doing your makeup Jez, it will all come off in the wine anyway.”
February 15, 2024 at 8:44 pm #7376In reply to: The Incense of the Quadrivium’s Mystiques
When they arrived at the hotel, the witches soon realized they were not the only uninvited guests here. With her keen sense of observation, Eris was the first to spot the traces left by an army of bedbugs. Tiny droppings on the mattresses and linen, blood stains left after the previous guests crushed the bugs while rolling in their bed. And the smell of dead rats was everywhere. Did they even have a cleaning staff here? When they complained, the hotel manager said: “Why do you care? Nobody comes here to sleep during carnival?”
Jeezel noticed the bug reference. Indeed, something was still bugging her after she had closed the portal. Something that should be obvious, yet was still an eyelash away from her grasp. But something more pressing was at stake. She posted pictures of the rooms and a reel of her disappointed face in front of the disaster.
“I was so happy to come to Rio for the first time. But the light is yellow and flickering. How can I show you how to do a proper Carnival makeup,” she said fluttering her eyelashes. As soon as the sound of a message well sent faded out, she started to receive support and love from her fans.
“Rio is not like that!”
“Somebody help.”
“2 bad! I’m on business trip. Wud hav luv to meet ya there!”
The sounds of likes and comments alerted Malové.
“What have you done! We were here incognito. Why don’t you go to the top of Jesus’s head and cast the Tempestarii Overture spell.”
“I could have! That would have gone viral. But we departed in such a hurry, I have left all my sapphires and stilettos in Limerick. You can’t cast that spell without them. Anyway, we don’t have to stay longer in that cesspit. One of my fans is abroad and has offered us to stay in his villa. Look at the pics! It looks as lush and gorgeous as a Jurassic park.”
Truella widened her eyes and said: “Saying that’s a big property would be an understatement. Roger would have loved to come with his new shovel.”
“Don’t even think of casting a second bilocation spell,” said Frigella. “You already look like deflated soufflé.”
“What’s the catch?” asked Eris with frown. “It looks like the kind of golden cage a king pin would own. But they have a pool.”
“He said we just have to feed the dwarf crocodiles while we are there,” said Jeezel nonplussed, looking at Truella whose eyes were ready to pop off of their sockets. Then she looked at Malové. “What do you say? You’re the eld…head witch of our coven.”
Malové’s eyebrow twitched. She was thinking fast. Little signs here and there, the orientation of the statues, the fountain, the placement of rocks that would look so random to a profane or a younger witch. Ancient earth magic? It was difficult to be sure with the framing of the pictures. Jeezel was swiping all the pictures her fan had sent her, hoping such glamour and mystery would melt Malové’s last reluctance.
“Omg! girls, we can’t refuse!” said Jeezel. “He’s got a bloat of pygmy hippos and a flamboyance of flamingos!”
As the drag witch continued to swipe the pictures, a prickle crept up Malové’s spine when she saw a familiar face amongst them.
“Look at him!” shouted Jeezel. “He’s a Gatsby with a spellbook.”
There were no more doubts for Malové about the kind of magic that had been used to build his empire. Augustus St Clair, a powerful witch indeed, and one whose invitation you couldn’t refuse especially since he now knew she was here. As one of the elders of the Rio’s witches community, she had danced the dance of rivals disguised as allies, a pas de deux filled with forced smiles and tight grips. Her words felt like needles scratching her lips when she uttered them: “Tell him we accept his invitation.”
The shouts of joy and disbelief coming from the witches couldn’t appease the memories that had resurfaced.
February 7, 2024 at 12:26 pm #7357In reply to: The Incense of the Quadrivium’s Mystiques
Truella ordered another round of drinks and some more peanuts and then went to the toilets. When she got back to the table on the sidewalk, Roger’s glass was empty and the peanuts had been eaten but there was no sign of Roger. Truella assumed that he’d also gone to the toilets, but after a quarter of an hour and he hadn’t returned, she asked the waiter to check on him. The waiter returned and informed her that nobody was in the mens toilet, and then a woman on the next table said that she’d noticed Truella’s friend making strange noises and that he had wandered off up the road.
“What kind of strange noises? And which way did he go?”
“Well, to be honest, monkey noises. He sounded like a chimpanzee,” the woman replied, looking a little embarrassed. “And he went that way,” she said, pointing towards where the monkeys had been trampolining on the shop awnings just down the road.
Truella looked in the direction she was pointing. “But where are the monkeys now?”
“Well,” the woman replied looking even more embarrassed, “They all followed your friend down the road. I don’t know where they are now.”
Truella took a hasty gulp of her drink, stood up and called the waiter over and asked for the bill. Without waiting for her change she ran down the street calling Rogers name. It crossed her mind that a locating spell would have been useful but she didn’t have time for that. Instead she asked some passers by where the monkeys were now.
The young couple turned and pointed behind them. “They all ran down that way, right down the middle of the road, crazy it was, stopped all the traffic. And they were all running after that big man!”
Truella started running in that direction and then stopped, gasping. It was no good, she’d never catch them up. Slowly she walked back to her car, wondering what to do next.
January 28, 2024 at 2:21 pm #7312In reply to: The Incense of the Quadrivium’s Mystiques
Every conversation stopped and every head turned to the door when Jeezel entered the Faded Cabbage. Her cheeks, round as plums, always gave her a fresh look. Her eyes, a mesmerizing shade of deep emerald green sparkling with otherworldy wisdom, slowly scanned the room, never looking at anyone in particular but seeing all. Her long ebony locks cascaded down her back, accentuating the mysterious aura that surrounded her. When Jeezel spotted her friends in that dimly lit corner, she pouted. The conversations suddenly started again, questions and rumours about her in every mouth. When she was sure everybody was talking about her, the hint of a smile raised the corner of her lips, as red as the apple that poisoned Snow White. She moved nonchalantly between the tables. The air around her shimmered with magic, leaving an indelible impression on those fortunate enough to be here that day.
Although, as soon as Jeezel entered Truella’s cloaking spell, people forgot all about her and resumed their conversation. She felt a pang of regret and sighed as she let her bottom fall gracefully on the chair. She put her phone on the table and started tapping it with her fingers. Each of them had an intricate silver ring carrying a unique enchantment.
“Jeez, Jeez!” exclaimed Truella. “Do you always have to project that attention-catching spell wherever you go? We need discretion.”
“What’s the purpose of having a beautiful silhouette if nobody’s looking at it?” Jeezel asked looking sideways at a blushing Frigella.
“And boy, stop that noise with your rings, said Truella. It makes me want to puke.”
“And I thought you were all about freedom,” snorted Jeezel.
“My freedom! How many times do I have to repeat? Where were we?” Truella asked rhetorically to Frigella.
A dozen notifications popped up on Jeezel’s phone. She picked it up, counted the likes to her last reality potion spell and started to scroll the replies of her Flick Flock fans.
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