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  • #4403
    F LoveF Love
    Participant

      random plot generator

      A BOOK SHOP – IT IS THE AFTERNOON AFTER ALBIE HIT HIS MOTHER WITH A FEATHER.

      Newly unemployed ALBIE is arguing with his friend JENNY RAMSBOTTOM. ALBIE tries to hug JENNY but she shakes him off angrily.

      ALBIE
      Please Jenny, don’t leave me.

      JENNY
      I’m sorry Albie, but I’m looking for somebody a bit more brave. Somebody who faces his fears head on, instead of running away. You hit your mother with a feather! You could have just talked to her!

      ALBIE
      I am such a person!

      JENNY
      I’m sorry, Albie. I just don’t feel excited by this relationship anymore.

      JENNY leaves and ALBIE sits down, looking defeated.

      Moments later, gentle sweet shop owner MR MATT HUMBLE barges in looking flustered.

      ALBIE
      Goodness, Matt! Is everything okay?

      MATT
      I’m afraid not.

      ALBIE
      What is it? Don’t keep me in suspense…

      MATT
      It’s … a hooligan … I saw an evil hooligan frighten a bunch of elderly ladies!

      ALBIE
      Defenseless elderly ladies?

      MATT
      Yes, defenseless elderly ladies!

      ALBIE
      Bloomin’ heck, Matt! We’ve got to do something.

      MATT
      I agree, but I wouldn’t know where to start.

      ALBIE
      You can start by telling me where this happened.

      MATT
      I was…
      MATT fans himself and begins to wheeze.

      ALBIE
      Focus Matt, focus! Where did it happen?

      MATT
      The Library! That’s right – the Library!

      ALBIE springs up and begins to run.

      EXT. A ROADCONTINUOUS

      ALBIE rushes along the street, followed by MATT. They take a short cut through some back gardens, jumping fences along the way.

      INT. A LIBRARYSHORTLY AFTER

      ROGER BLUNDER a forgetful hooligan terrorises two elderly ladies.

      ALBIE, closely followed by MATT, rushes towards ROGER, but suddenly stops in his tracks.

      MATT
      What is is? What’s the matter?

      ALBIE
      That’s not just any old hooligan, that’s Roger Blunder!

      MATT
      Who’s Roger Blunder?

      ALBIE
      Who’s Roger Blunder? Who’s Roger Blunder? Only the most forgetful hooligan in the universe!

      MATT
      Blinkin’ knickers, Albie! We’re going to need some help if we’re going to stop the most forgetful hooligan in the universe!

      ALBIE
      You can say that again.

      MATT
      Blinkin’ knickers, Albie! We’re going to need some help if we’re going to stop the most forgetful hooligan in the universe!

      ALBIE
      I’m going to need candlesticks, lots of candlesticks.

      Roger turns and sees Albie and Matt. He grins an evil grin.

      ROGER
      Albie Jones, we meet again!

      MATT
      You’ve met?

      ALBIE
      Yes. It was a long, long time ago…

      EXT. A PARKBACK IN TIME

      A young ALBIE is sitting in a park listening to some trance music, when suddenly a dark shadow casts over him.

      He looks up and sees ROGER. He takes off his headphones.

      ROGER
      Would you like some wine gums?

      ALBIE’s eyes light up, but then he studies ROGER more closely, and looks uneasy.

      ALBIE
      I don’t know, you look kind of forgetful.

      ROGER
      Me? No. I’m not forgetful. I’m the least forgetful hooligan in the world.

      ALBIE
      Wait, you’re a hooligan?

      ALBIE runs away, screaming.

      INT. A LIBRARYPRESENT DAY

      ROGER
      You were a coward then, and you are a coward now.

      MATT
      (To ALBIE) You ran away?
      ALBIE
      (To MATT) I was a young child. What was I supposed to do?
      ALBIE turns to ROGER.

      ALBIE
      I may have run away from you then, but I won’t run away this time!
      ALBIE runs away.

      He turns back and shouts.

      ALBIE
      I mean, I am running away, but I’ll be back – with candlesticks.

      ROGER
      I’m not scared of you.

      ALBIE
      You should be.

      INT. A SWEET SHOPLATER THAT DAY

      ALBIE and MATT walk around searching for something.

      ALBIE
      I feel sure I left my candlesticks somewhere around here.

      MATT
      Are you sure? It does seem like an odd place to keep deadly candlesticks.

      ALBIE
      You know nothing Matt Humble.

      MATT
      We’ve been searching for ages. I really don’t think they’re here.

      Suddenly, ROGER appears, holding a pair of candlesticks.

      ROGER
      Looking for something?

      MATT
      Crikey, Albie, he’s got your candlesticks.

      ALBIE
      Tell me something I don’t already know!

      MATT
      The earth’s circumference at the equator is about 40,075 km.

      ALBIE
      I know that already!

      MATT
      I’m afraid of dust.

      ROGER
      (appalled) Dude!

      While ROGER is looking at MATT with disgust, ALBIE lunges forward and grabs his deadly candlesticks. He wields them, triumphantly.

      ALBIE
      Prepare to die, you forgetful aubergine!

      ROGER
      No please! All I did was frighten a bunch of elderly ladies!

      JENNY enters, unseen by any of the others.

      ALBIE
      I cannot tolerate that kind of behaviour! Those elderly ladies were defenceless! Well now they have a defender – and that’s me! Albie Jones defender of innocent elderly ladies.

      ROGER
      Don’t hurt me! Please!

      ALBIE
      Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t use these candlesticks on you right away!

      ROGER
      Because Albie, I am your father.

      ALBIE looks stunned for a few moments, but then collects himself.

      ALBIE
      No you’re not!

      ROGER
      Ah well, it had to be worth a try.

      ROGER tries to grab the candlesticks but ALBIE dodges out of the way.

      ALBIE
      Who’s the daddy now? Huh? Huh?

      Unexpectedly, ROGER slumps to the ground.

      MATT
      Did he just faint?

      ALBIE
      I think so. Well that’s disappointing. I was rather hoping for a more dramatic conclusion, involving my deadly candlesticks.

      ALBIE crouches over ROGER’s body.

      MATT
      Be careful, Albie. It could be a trick.

      ALBIE
      No, it’s not a trick. It appears that… It would seem… Roger Blunder is dead!

      ALBIE
      What?

      ALBIE
      Yes, it appears that I scared him to death.

      MATT claps his hands.

      MATT
      So your candlesticks did save the day, after all.

      JENNY steps forward.

      JENNY
      Is it true? Did you kill the forgetful hooligan?

      ALBIE
      Jenny how long have you been…?

      JENNY puts her arm around ALBIE.

      JENNY
      Long enough.

      ALBIE
      Then you saw it for yourself. I killed Roger Blunder.

      JENNY
      Then the elderly ladies are safe?

      ALBIE
      It does seem that way!

      A crowd of vulnerable elderly ladies enter, looking relived.

      JENNY
      You are their hero.

      The elderly ladies bow to ALBIE.

      ALBIE
      There is no need to bow to me. I seek no worship. The knowledge that Roger Blunder will never frighten elderly ladies ever again, is enough for me.

      JENNY
      You are humble as well as brave! And I think that makes up for hitting your mother with a feather. It does in my opinion!

      One of the elderly ladies passes ALBIE a healing ring

      JENNY
      I think they want you to have it, as a symbol of their gratitude.

      ALBIE
      I couldn’t possibly.
      Pause.

      ALBIE
      Well, if you insist. It could come in handy when I go to the Doline tomorrow. With my friend Matt. It is dangerous and only for brave people and a healing ring could come in handy.

      ALBIE takes the ring.

      ALBIE
      Thank you.
      The elderly ladies bow their heads once more, and leave.

      ALBIE turns to JENNY.

      ALBIE
      Does this mean you want me back?

      JENNY
      Oh, Albie, of course I want you back!
      ALBIE smiles for a few seconds, but then looks defiant.

      ALBIE
      Well you can’t have me.

      JENNY
      WHAT?

      ALBIE
      You had no faith in me. You had to see my scare a hooligan to death before you would believe in me. I don’t want a lover like that. And I am going to the Doline and I may not be back!

      JENNY
      But…

      ALBIE
      Please leave. I want to spend time with the one person who stayed with me through thick and thin – my best friend, Matt.

      MATT grins.

      JENNY
      But…

      MATT
      You heard the gentleman. Now be off with you. Skidaddle! Shoo!

      JENNY
      Albie?

      ALBIE
      I’m sorry Jenny, but I think you should skidaddle.
      JENNY leaves.

      MATT turns to ALBIE.

      MATT
      Did you mean that? You know … that I’m your best friend?

      ALBIE
      Of course you are!
      The two walk off arm in arm.

      Suddenly MATT stops.

      MATT
      When I said I’m afraid of dust, you know I was just trying to distract the hooligan don’t you?

      #4398
      ÉricÉric
      Keymaster

        “Flat as a pancake!” she said with a doleful air and grandiose waves of her hands. “The world is flat as a pancake. Oh, sure it turns, about just as slow as needed so we won’t notice, little bugs that we are on that big flat pancake.”
        “Really? And the doline…”
        “At the center of it, obviously.” She paused mysteriously. “And if the legends are true, when the gates open, all the other stuff freely goes in and out.”
        “From where?” another student asked
        EVERYWHERE” she leaned her head forward, matted hair sticking to her temple, a feverish madness twinkling her eyes. “All the dimensions take a turn, turn, turn, turn.”

        #4392
        Jib
        Participant

          “Tourists!” shouted Ugo the gecko to his albino friends. They all stopped and turned their heads in unison to look at the two humans who had entered the premises, inside their small chests their hearts beating fast with excitement like so many small shamanic drums that only gecko ears could hear. Ugo was so engrossed in those two humongous creatures and the hypnotic rhythm of his friends’ heartbeats that he didn’t see the suckers from his front left paw were getting loose again. They had been damaged in a fight with a twirling bat one week ago and they still hadn’t heal nicely because he didn’t care so much. Soon his left paw got detached from the ancient stones of the wall, followed by his right and soon he fell. But like he was made of sticking rubber the fall was short and he got stuck again on a lower stone, walking on the head of a few friends in the process.

          “Sorry for that! I’ll have them checked, promise.”

          Some of the geckos missed a heartbeat, frightened by the sudden turmoil. They ran in what might appear random directions and panic quickly spread among the albino geckolony on the wall. By a miracle of nature and because they were all so fascinated by tourists, the geckos rearranged nicely only to stop a sucking steps away and turned their head back again toward the tourists. Their hearts beating in unison again.

          “Look! that dark wall over there with the white hieroglyphs. I’m sure it just moved!” said the tallest of the tourists. She was curious and decided to go watch by herself what that curious wall was about.

          #4335

          In the kitchen, Fox beheaded the chicken in a swift move. He tried not to be horrified when the creature’s body kept on running around, headless like a peaslander. He felt vaguely aware that’s what he’d been doing all that time. Running around without a very clear idea about what he was doing.

          “Don’t let it run around bloody n’all!” said Margoritt, “Who do you think is going to clean that mess?” The old woman, huff and puff, limped rhythmically after their dinner. Someone had heard her scream and came into the kitchen. It was that tall Fae guy, Rukshan, who looked so successful and handsome. Fox felt depressed. The Fae had caught the dead body, which had eventually stopped moving, and put it in the basket Margoritt had taken on the table.

          “Thanks my dear,” she said with a giggle. “Would you be so kind as to pluck it for me?” She then looked at Fox. “Sorry, lad, but with a name like yours I’m not sure I can trust you on this one.” The old lady winked.

          Fox couldn’t be annoyed at Margoritt, he wouldn’t trust himself with a chicken, dead or alive. And the old lady had saved him from the blizzard and from that strange curse. He attempted a smile but all he could do was a grimace. Margoritt looked at him as if noticing something.

          “Why don’t you go with Rukshan,” she said, “A bit of fresh air would do you good.”
          Fox shrugged, and followed the Fae outside.

          “And send me that Eleri girl, I’d like to have a word with her while she clean the blood on the tiling.”

          Outside it was noisier. Fox found the woman arguing with her male friends, one of whom looked like a statue with big wings. She seemed relieved to have a reason to get away from the crowd and her own problems and left with a smile. He wondered how she could stay happy while being surrounded by conflict. Maybe she liked it. Fox shrugged again.

          He walked to the small courtyard, sat on a log and watched the handsome Fae removing the feathers. Rukshan’s hands looked clean, the blood was not sticking on his fair skin and the chicken feathers were piling neatly on a small heap at his feet.
          “Aren’t Faes supposed to be vegetarian,” he said. He cringed inwardly at his own words. What a stupid way of engaging a conversation.

          Without stopping, Rukshan answered: “I think you think too much. It’s not doing you much good, and it deepens the shadow under your eyes. Not that it doesn’t suit you well.” The Fae winked. Fox wasn’t sure of how to take it. He stayed silent. He saw the bag the Fae was always carrying with him and wondered what was inside.

          “It’s a story,” said Rukshan.
          Fox was confused and looked puzzled.
          “In the bag. It’s a story. But it’s not finished.”

          Fox felt warmth rise to his face. If the Fae could read his thoughts… he preferred not to think about it. Rukshan smiled gently.

          “I need help to complete it and better understand the characters. Would you like to help me?”
          Fox wasn’t sure what made him answer yes. Did it matter if it was for the welcomed distraction from his dark thoughts, or if it was for the promise of more time spent with the Fae?

          #4331

          “What was in the bag, Finnley, tell us!”
          Everyone was looking at the maid after the Inspector had left hurriedly, under the pretext of taking care of a tip he had received on the disappearance of the German girl.

          Godfrey was the most curious in fact. He couldn’t believe in the facade of meanness that Finnley carefully wrapped herself into. The way she cared about the animals around the house was a testimony to her well hidden sweetness. Most of all, he thought herself incapable of harming another being.
          But he had been surprised before. Like when Liz’ had finished a novel, long ago.

          “Alright, I’ll show you. Stay there, you lot of accomplices.”

          Godfrey looked at Liz’ sideways, who was distracted anyway by the gardener, who was looking at the nearby closet.

          Liz’, will you focus please! The mystery is about to be revealed!”

          “Oh shut up, Godfrey, there’s no mystery at all. I’ve known for a while what that dastardly maid had done. I’ve been onto her for weeks!”
          “Really?”
          “Oh, don’t you give me that look. I’m not as incapable as you think, and that bloodshot-eyes stupor I affect is only to keep annoyances away. Like my dear mother, if you remember.”
          “So tell us, if you’re so smart now. In case it’s really a corpse, at least, we may all be prepared for the unwrapping!”
          “A CORPSE! Ahaha, you fool Godfrey. It’s not A corpse! It’s MANY CORPSES!”

          Godfrey really thought for a second that she had completely lost it. Again. He would have to call the nearby sanatorium, make up excuses for the next signing session at the library, and cancel all future public appear…

          “Will you stop that! I know what you’re doing, you bloody control machine! Stop that thinking of yours, I can’t even hear myself thinking nowadays for all your bloody thinking. Now, as I was saying of course she’d been hiding all the corpses!”
          “Are you insane, Liz’ —at least keep your voice down…”
          “Don’t be such a sourdough Godfrey, you’re sour, and sticky and all full of gas. JUST LET ME EXPLAIN, for Lemone’s sake!”

          Godfrey fell silent for a moment, eyeing a lost peanut left on a shelf nearby.

          Conscious of the unfair competition for Godfrey’s attention Elizabeth blurted it all in one sentence:
          “She’s been collecting them, my old failed stories, the dead drafts and old discarded versions of them. Hundreds of characters, those little things, I’d given so many cute little names, but they had no bones or shape, and very little personality, I had to smother them to death.” She started sobbing uncontrollably.

          That was then that Finnley came back in the room, panting and dragging the sack coated in dirt inside the room, and seeing the discomfit Liz’ with smeared make-up all over her eyes.

          “Oh, bloody hell. Don’t you tell me I brought that dirty bag of scraps up for nothing!”

          She left there, running for the door screaming “I’m not doing the carpets again!”

          And closed the door with a sonorous “BUGGER!”

          #4257

          Gibbon was peeling a red apple at the end of their impromptu lunch. He handed a thin slice to Fox who took it and chewed it carefully. It was sweet and juicy, prompting him to want more.

          They had returned to Fox’s hut outside the city wall. It had not the comfort that plumbing and central heating could bring, but its four walls were enough to protect them from the chilly air outside and give them a sense of proximity. Humans like to be in human sized boxes, thought Fox. They lived in boxes they called houses; they went to work in other boxes they called bank, or smithery, or medical centre —even their outdoor markets were full of virtual boxes called booth or stand; then they had fun in another kind of boxes they called Inn, or Night Club, or brothel (depending on the persona).

          “You’re thinking again,” said Gibbon without raising his eyes from his apple. He handed another slice to Fox who was impressed and annoyed by how his master could read him so easily. Maybe it was luck or real power. Gibbon never told about how he did all that he did. He only said: “I’m not sure that would help you quiet your thoughts.” And that was the end of the subject.

          Fox took the slice and came back to his conscientious mastication. It was the rule, he had learned, with Gibbon. You don’t talk when you eat. You don’t think when you eat. You just eat, and breath when you are not swallowing. Fox felt like he was back into the Southern forest where Gibbon had found him, the lone survivor of a litter of five. His mother had been killed, and already four of his siblings were dead. Gibbon, who was already old at that time, took him in and taught him the wisdom of breathing innate among his kind. Fox then did as he was taught, focus his attention on his actions, and particularly on his breathing at all time. It helped him focus and calm down his heart.

          After they finished the apple and cleaned the place a bit, Gibbon took a deep breath. Fox knew it was the time he would Talk.

          “You’ve been looking for a reason,” said the old master in a breath. Fox was all ears, he almost began to feel them becoming pointy again. He moved his attention back to his breathing and peace filled in his heart again. It was mingled with the excitement of listening to his old master’s voice again, but Fox sticked to the peace and the excitement subsided naturally.

          “I’m going to give you an assignment,” continued Gibbon in between his long breaths. His eyes were shiny and seemed to glow in the dim light of the hut. He wasn’t blinking. He never blinked when he Talked. “I see you’ve mastered the power of breathing. You need to learn the wisdom of the Heart now.”

          Fox was ready. He had been for many years. Even when Fox left the Southern forest to find his destiny he was ready. He now realised he left because Gibbon would not teach him. And now, he came to teach me! Fox let the thought and the excitement subside again. His master would not Talk again until it was quiet.

          IIIIIIII’m not going to teach you,” said the master. “You are going to find your own master for this one.”

          “But you are my master,” said Fox, not understanding why it was happening again. “You have the power of the Heart. You can teach me.”

          IIIIII’m not your master on this one, Fox. I taught you all I was supposed to teach you. No less, no more.”

          “Where will I find my master then?”

          “You will find him in time. But first your assignment,” said Gibbon. He paused to breath deeply, his eyes intense as the full Moon. “You’ll find a lost soul in the enchanted forest. Bring it back to its rightful owner. Then you shall find your master.”

          Fox had opened his mouth to ask him how he could find a lost piece of soul, or what a piece of soul looked like, but Gibbon had already closed his eyes and entered in a deep meditation from where there were no outside interruption possible. He stood up and stretched his body. There was no need to wait aimlessly around, hoping Gibbon would come out of his meditation state soon. It could last days, even weeks.

          While packing a few things he would need on the road, like food, a knife, some clothes, Fox pondered his options. Going in the enchanted forest looking randomly for something he didn’t even know about seemed to much like his old self. He needed some more information and he had an idea about who could give them to him. The witch from the market. She would know. And she lived in the enchanted forest.

          Before closing the hut’s door, Fox looked at his master one last time. His body was very still, if you didn’t know him, you’d think he was not breathing. He had a serene smile on his face. Fox smiled and felt the love of his master and his master’s way fill his heart. He had given him a purpose, and for that Fox was grateful. He shut the door quietly and began to walk toward the enchanted forest. He heard ducks in the distance, it was as if they were singing. He laughed. It was mid afternoon. If he walked at a good pace, he would arrive at the old mansion before nightfall.

          #4230

          Deftly Glynis reached inside the flowing sleeve of her burka and pulled out a small vial of clear liquid she had strapped to her wrist. She pulled off the top and quickly threw the contents over Fox.

          “There you go, little Fella,” she said. “Now no-one can see you.”

          “Where’d he go, dammit! I saw him come over this way,” shouted a podgy red-faced man, puffing heavily with the unaccustomed exertion. “I’ll teach that little varmint to try and eat my hens! What did you do with him, Witch!?”

          Glynis took one of the remaining jars from her table and held it out to the man.

          “Give your wife three drops every evening as she sleeps,” she said, trying her best to sound crackly and old. “She will get well after 3 days — you don’t need to sell your hens to pay that doctor any longer. He wasn’t doing her any good.”

          “Eh?” said the man in surprise, at the same time taking the jar. “True enough that is, but how did you know?”

          “I know many things,” she answered mysteriously. “Now, take your hens home, and I wish you and your good wife all the best.”

          “Well, this is remarkable. Thank you very much indeed,” said Fox when the podgy man had gone.

          “If you are hungry I have a hard boiled egg and some fruit in my bag. Help yourself.”

          “Ha ha!” laughed Fox. “People will think you are talking to the ground.” He was quite delighted with his new invisible status and considering the various possibilities it offered him.

          “Now don’t you go taking advantage of any more hens just because you are invisible. It will wear off in about an hour, I think. I haven’t actually tried it on anyone other than myself before … I’ve never thought it ethical to sell the invisibility potion in case someone gets up to no good with it. But I like to keep some handy, just in case. “

          Just then the Town Clock chimed.

          “I’d best be going now. I have to go before the warden comes to check my permit … I don’t have one but as long as I get away early it is usually okay,” said Glynis. “Now, if you have any problems with the invisibility spell come and see me. I live in the old mansion in the enchanted forest. Do you know your way there?

          “I think I can find it,” said Fox. “Thanks again for your assistance.”

          Glynis had intended to head directly towards the forest after she left the market, but on impulse took the longer route through the pretty and tree lined Gingko Lane, part of the ‘Old City’. She walked slowly, in part to continue her ruse of being a person of advanced years, and in part because she felt a reluctance to leave the city and return to the solitude of her home.

          She pondered the events of the morning as she walked.

          The vision … the sandy haired woman on her sick bed, like stick and bone she was, with the doctor of dark intent leaning over her… and then the podgy faced man standing in the hen house and grieving over his hens.

          It had been so vivid. And unexpected. So she had acted on it, her heart beating in trepidation though she had spoken with authority to the man.

          And it had worked!

          It was not the first time Glynis had such a vision. But never in such testing circumstances!

          A young man was walking towards her. His face deep in concentrated contemplation, he did not look up.

          Fae, thought Glynis, though she was not sure how she knew.

          As he passed, Glynis reached out on impulse and touched his arm. He jumped, startled.

          “I think this is for you,” she said, handing him her last vial of potion. “Use it when you need it most.”

          The young man hesitated, unsure, but taking the vial.

          Glynis shook her head, wanting to deflect his questions. She turned quickly away.

          Relenting, she stopped and looked directly at him.

          “Magic comes from the heart. You will know when to use it.”

          #4219

          As the crow flies, Glenville is about 100 miles from the Forest of Enchantment.

          “What a pretty town!” tourists to the area would exclaim, delighted by the tree lined streets and quaint houses with thatched roofs and brightly painted exteriors. They didn’t see the dark underside which rippled just below the surface of this exuberant facade. If they stayed for more than a few days, sure enough, they would begin to sense it. “Time to move on, perhaps,” they would say uneasily, although unsure exactly why and often putting it down to their own restless natures.

          Glynis Cotfield was born in one of these houses. Number 4 Leafy Lane. Number 4 had a thatched roof and was painted a vibrant shade of yellow. There were purple trims around each window and a flower box either side of the front door containing orange flowers which each spring escaped their confines to sprawl triumphantly down the side of the house.

          Her father, Kevin Cotfield, was a bespectacled clerk who worked in an office at the local council. He was responsible for building permits and making sure people adhered to very strict requirements to ‘protect the special and unique character of Glenville’.

          And her mother, Annelie … well, her mother was a witch. Annelie Cotfield came from a long line of witches and she had 3 siblings, all of whom practised the magical arts in some form or other.

          Uncle Brettwick could make fire leap from any part of his body. Once, he told Glynis she could put her hand in the fire and it wouldn’t hurt her. Tentatively she did. To her amazement the fire was cold; it felt like the air on a frosty winter’s day. She knew he could also make the fire burning hot, if he wanted. Some people were a little scared of her Uncle Brettwick and there were occasions—such as when Lucy Dickwit told everyone at school they should spit at Glynis because she came from an ‘evil witch family’—when she used this to her advantage.

          “Yes, and I will tell my Uncle to come and burn down your stinking house if you don’t shut your stinking stupid mouth!” she said menacingly, sticking her face close to Lucy’s face. “And give me your bracelet,” she added as an after thought. It had worked. She got her peace and she got the bracelet.

          Aunt Janelle could move objects with her mind. She set up a stall in the local market and visitors to the town would give her money to watch their trinkets move. “Lay it on the table”, she would command them imperiously. “See, I place my hands very far from your coin. I do not touch it. See?” Glynis would giggle because Aunt Janelle put on a funny accent and wore lots of garish makeup and would glare ferociously at the tourists.

          But Aunt Bethell was Glynis’s favourite—she made magic with stories. “I am the Mistress of Illusions,” she would tell people proudly. When Glynis was little, Aunt Bethell would create whole stories for her entertainment. When Glynis tried to touch the story characters, her hand would go right through them. And Aunt Bethell didn’t even have to be in the same room as Glynis to send her a special magical story. Glynis adored Aunt Bethell.

          Her mother, Annelie, called herself a healer but others called her a witch. She concocted powerful healing potions using recipes from her ’Big Book of Spells’, a book which had belonged to Annelie’s mother and her mother before her. On the first page of the book, in spindly gold writing it said: ‘May we never forget our LOVE of Nature and the Wisdom of Ages’. When Glynis asked what the ‘Wisdom of Ages’ meant, her mother said it was a special knowing that came from the heart and from our connection with All That Is. She said Glynis had the Wisdom of Ages too and then she would ask Glynis to gather herbs from the garden for her potions. Glynis didn’t think she had any particular wisdom and wondered if it was a ploy on her mother’s part to get free labour. She obeyed grudgingly but drew the line at learning any spells. And on this matter her father sided with her. “Don’t fill her mind with all that hocus pocus stuff,” he would say grumpily.

          Despite this, the house was never empty; people came from all over to buy her mother’s potions and often to have their fortunes told as well. Mostly while her father was at work.

          Glynis’s best friend when she was growing up was Tomas. Tomas lived at number 6 Leafy Lane. They both knew instinctively they shared a special bond because Tomas’s father also practised magic. He was a sorcerer. Glynis was a bit scared of Tomas’s Dad who had a funny crooked walk and never spoke directly to her. “Tell your friend you must come home now, Tomas,” he would call over the fence.

          Being the son of a sorcerer, Tomas would also be a sorcerer. “It is my birthright,” he told her seriously one day. Glynis was impressed and wondered if Tomas had the Wisdom of Ages but it seemed a bit rude to ask in case he didn’t.

          When Tomas was 13, his father took him away to begin his sorcery apprenticeship. Sometimes he would be gone for days at a time. Tomas never talked about where he went or what he did there. But he started to change: always a quiet boy, he became increasingly dark and brooding.

          Glynis felt uneasy around this new Tomas and his growing possessiveness towards her. When Paul Ackleworthy asked her to the School Ball, Tomas was so jealous he broke Paul’s leg. Of course, nobody other than Glynis guessed it was Tomas who caused Paul’s bike to suddenly wobble so that he fell in the way of a passing car.

          “You could have fucking killed him!” she had shouted at Tomas.

          Tomas just shrugged. This was when she started to be afraid of him.

          One day he told her he was going for his final initiation into the ‘Sorcerer Fraternity’.

          “I have to go away for quite some time; I am not sure how long, but I want you to wait for me, Glynis.”

          “Wait for you?”

          He looked at her intensely. “It is destined for us to be together and you must promise you will be here for me when I get back.”

          Glynis searched for her childhood friend in his eyes but she could no longer find him there.

          “Look, Tomas, I don’t know,” she stuttered, wary of him, unwilling to tell the truth. “Maybe we shouldn’t make any arrangements like this … after all you might be away for a long time. You might meet someone else even …. some hot Sorceress,” she added, trying not to sound hopeful.

          Suddenly, Glynis found herself flying. A gust of wind from nowhere lifted her from her feet, spun her round and then held her suspended, as though trying to decide what to do next, before letting her go. She landed heavily at Tomas’s feet.

          “Ow!” she said angrily.

          “Promise me.”

          “Okay! I promise!” she said.

          Her mother’s face went white when Glynis told her what Tomas had done.

          That evening there was a gathering of Uncle Brettwick and the Aunts. There was much heated discussion which would cease abruptly when Glynis or her father entered the room. “Alright, dearie?” one of the Aunts would say, smiling way too brightly. And over the following days and weeks there was a flurry of magical activity at 4 Leafy Lane, all accompanied by fervent and hushed whisperings.

          Glynis knew they were trying to help her, and was grateful, but after the initial fear, she became defiant. “Who the hell did he think he was, anyway?” She left Glenville to study architecture at the prestigious College of Mugglebury. It was there she met Conway, who worked in the cafe where she stopped for coffee each morning on her way to class. They fell in love and moved in together, deciding that as soon as Glynis had graduated they would marry. It had been 4 years since she had last seen Tomas and he was now no more than a faint anxious fluttering in her chest.

          It was a Friday when she got the news that Conway had driven in the path of an oncoming truck and was killed instantly. She knew it was Friday because she was in the supermarket buying supplies for a party that weekend to celebrate her exams being over when she got the call. And it was the same day Tomas turned up at her house.

          And it was then she knew.

          “You murderer!” she had screamed through her tears. “Kill me too, if you want to. I will never love you.”

          “You’ve broken my heart,” he said. “And for that you must pay the price. If I can’t have you then I will make sure no-one else wants you either.”

          “You don’t have a heart to break,” she whispered.

          Dragon face,” Tomas hissed as he left.

          Glynis returned to Glenville just long enough to tell her family she was leaving again. “No, she didn’t know where,” she said, her heart feeling like stone. Her mother and her Aunts cried and begged her to reconsider. Her Uncle smouldered in silent fury and let off little puffs of smoke from his ears which he could not contain. Her father was simply bewildered and wanted to know what was all the fuss about and for crying out loud why was she wearing a burka?

          The day she left her mother gave her the ‘Book of Spells”. Glynis knew how precious this book was to her mother but could only think how heavy it would be to lug around with her on her journey.

          “Remember, Glynis,” her mother said as she hugged Glynis tightly to her, “the sorcerers have powerful magic but it is a mere drop in the ocean in comparison to the magic of All That Is. You have that great power within you and no sorcerer can take take that from you. You have the power to transform this into something beautiful.”

          #4123

          Corrie’s findings from elsewhere:

          “Mike wasn’t as courageous as his former self, the Baron. That new name had a cowardly undertone which wasn’t as enticing to craze and bravery as “The Baron”.

          The idea of the looming limbo which had swallowed the man whole, and having to care for a little girl who surely shouldn’t be out there on her own at such an early hour of the day spelt in unequivocal letters “T-R-O-U-B-B-L-E” — ah, and that he was barely literate wasn’t an improvement on the character either.

          Mike didn’t want to think to much. He could remember a past, maybe even a future, and be bound by them. As well, he probably had a family, and the mere though of it would be enough to conjure up a boring wife named Tina, and six or seven… he had to stop now. Self introspection wasn’t good for him, he would get lost in it in quicker and surer ways than if he’d run into that Limbo.

          “Let me tell you something… Prune?… Prune is it?”
          “I stop you right there, mister, we don’t have time for the “shouldn’t be here on your own” talk, there is a man to catch, and maybe more where he hides.”

          “Little girl, this is not my battle, I know a lost cause when I see one. You look exhausted, and I told my wife I would be back with her bloody croissants before she wakes up. You can’t imagine the dragon she becomes if she doesn’t get her croissants and coffee when she wakes up. My pick-up is over there, I can offer you a lift.”

          Prune made a frown and a annoyed pout. At her age, she surely should know better than pout. The thought of the dragon-wife made her smile though, she sounded just like Mater when she was out of vegemite and toasts.

          Prune started to have a sense of when characters appearing in her life were just plot devices conjured out of thin air. Mike had potential, but somehow had just folded back into a self-imposed routine, and had become just a part of the story background. She’d better let him go until just finds a real character. She could start by doing a stake-out next to the strange glowing building near the frontier.

          “It’s OK mister, you go back to your wife, I’ll wait a little longer at the border. Something tells me this story just got started.”

          ~~~

          Aunt Idle was craving for sweets again. She tip toed in the kitchen, she didn’t want to hear another lecture from Mater. It only took time from her indulging in her attachments. Her new yogiguru Togurt had told the flockus group that they had to indulge more. And she was determined to do so.
          The kitchen was empty. A draft of cold air brushed her neck, or was it her neck brushing against the tiny molecules of R. She cackled inwardly, which almost made her choke on her breath. That was surely a strange experience, choking on something without substance. A first for her, if you know what I mean.

          The shelves were closed with simple locks. She snorted. Mater would need more than that to put a stop to Idle’s cravings. She had watched a video on Wootube recently about how to unlock a lock. She would need pins. She rummaged through her dreadlocks, she was sure she had forgotten one or two in there when she began to forge the dreads. Very practicle for smuggling things.

          It took her longer than she had thought, only increasing her craving for sweets.
          There was only one jar. Certainly honey. Idle took the jar and turned it to see the sticker. It was written Termite Honey, Becky’s Farm in Mater’s ornate writing. Idle opened the jar. Essence of sweetness reached her nose and made her drool. She plunged her fingers into the white thick substance.”

          ~~~

          “But wait! What is this?

          Her greedy fingers had located something unexpected; something dense and uncompromising was lurking in her precious nectar. Carefully, she explored the edges of the object with her finger tips and then tugged. The object obligingly emerged, a gooey gelatinous blob.

          Dido sponged off the honey allowing it to plunk on to the table top. It did not occur to her to clean it up. Indeed, she felt a wave of defiant pleasure.

          The ants will love that, although I guess Mater won’t be so thrilled. Fussy old bat.
          She licked her fingers then transferred her attention back to the job at hand. After a moment of indecision whilst her slightly disordered mind flicked through various possibilities, she managed to identify the object as a small plastic package secured with tape. Excited, and her ravenous hunger cravings temporarily stilled in the thrill of the moment, she began to pick at the edges of the tape.

          Cocooned Inside the plastic was a piece of paper folded multiple times. Released from its plicature, the wrinkled and dog-eared paper revealed the following type written words:

          food self herself next face write water truth religious behind mince salt words soon yourself hope nature keep wrong wonder noticed.”

          ~~~

          ““What a load of rubbish!” Idle exclaimed, disappointed that it wasn’t a more poetic message. She screwed up the scrap of crumpled paper, rolled it in the honey on the table, and threw it at the ceiling. It stuck, in the same way that cooked spaghetti sticks to the ceiling when you throw it to see if it’s done. She refocused on the honey and her hunger for sweetness, and sank her fingers back into the jar.”

          ~~~

          “The paper fell from the ceiling on to Dido’s head. She was too busy stuffing herself full of honey to notice. In fact it was days before anyone noticed.”

          ~~~

          “The honeyed ball of words had dislodged numerous strands of dried spaghetti, which nestled amongst Aunt Idle’s dreadlocks rather attractively, with the paper ball looking like a little hair bun.”

          ~~~

          ““Oh my god …. gross!“ cackled the cautacious Cackler.”

          ~~~

          ““Right, that does it! I’m moving the whole family back to the right story!” said Aunt Idle, invigorated and emboldened with the sweet energy of the honey. “Bloody cackling nonsense!””

          #4121

          Corrie’s findings from elsewhere:

          “You can’t leave without a permit, you know,” Prune said, startling Quentin who was sneaking out of his room.

          “I’m just going for a walk,” he replied, irritated. “And what are you doing skulking around at this hour, anyway? Shouldn’t you be in bed?”

          “What are you doing with an orange suitcase in the corridor at three o’clock in the morning?” the young brat retorted. “Where are you going?”

          “Owl watching, that’s what I’m doing. And I don’t have a picnic basket, so I’m taking my suitcase.” Quentin had an idea. “Would you like to come?” The girls local knowledge might come in handy, up to a point, and then he could dispose of her somehow, and continue on his way.

          Prune narrowed her eyes with suspicion. She didn’t believe the owl story, but curiosity compelled her to accept the invitation. She couldn’t sleep anyway, not with all the yowling mating cats on the roof. Aunt Idle had forbidden her to leave the premises on her own after dark, but she wasn’t on her own if she was with a story refugee, was she?”

          ~~~

          “Seeing Dido eating her curry cookies would turn Mater’s stomach, so she went up to her room.

          Good riddance she thought, one less guest to worry about.
          Not that she usually thought that way, but every time the guests leaved, there was a huge weight lifted from her back, and a strong desire of “never again”.
          The cleaning wasn’t that much worry, it helped clear her thoughts (while Haki was doing it), but the endless worrying, that was the killer.

          After a painful ascension of the broken steps, she put her walking stick on the wall, and started some breathing exercises. The vinegary smell of all the pickling that the twins had fun experimenting with was searing at her lungs. The breathing exercise helped, even if all the mumbo jumbo about transcendant presence was all rubbish.

          It was time for her morning oracle. Many years ago, when she was still a young and innocent flower, she would cut bits and pieces of sentences at random from old discarded magazines. Books would have been sacrilegious at the time, but now she wouldn’t care for such things and Prune would often scream when she’d find some of her books missing key plot points. Many times, Mater would tell her the plots were full of holes anyway, so why bother; Prune’d better exercise her own imagination instead of complaining. Little bossy brat. She reminded her so much of her younger self.

          So she opened her wooden box full of strips of paper. Since many years, Mater had acquired a taste for more expensive and tasty morsels of philosophy and not rubbish literature, so the box smelt a bit of old parchment. Nonetheless, she wasn’t adverse to a modicum of risqué bits from tattered magazines either. Like a blend of fine teas, she somehow had found a very nice mix, and oftentimes the oracle would reveal such fine things, that she’d taken to meditate on it at least once a day. Even if she wouldn’t call it meditate, that was for those good-for-nothing willy-nilly hippies.

          There it was. She turned each bit one by one, to reveal the haiku-like message of the day.

          “Bugger!” the words flew without thinking through her parched lips.

          looked forgotten rat due idea half
          getting floverley comment somehow
          prune hardly wondered eyes great
          inn run days dark quentin simulation

          That silly Prune, she’d completely forgotten to check on her. She was glad the handwritten names she’d added in the box would pop up so appropriately.

          She would pray to Saint Floverley of the Dunes, a local icon who was synchretized from old pagan rituals and still invoked for those incapable of dancing.
          With her forking arthritis, she would need her grace much.”

          #4114
          TracyTracy
          Participant

            Liz adjusted her reclining chair and lit another cigarette. Idly, she contemplated getting up to make another cup of tea, but was not thus far compelled to take the necessary action. There were advantages and disadvantages to locking the others in the cellar to work on her anthology. She had to make her own tea, it was true, but the unaccustomed peace was worth it ~ so far, anyway. Glancing out of the window, she noticed the lawns were in need of mowing and the herbaceous borders needed dead heading, but it was still green and pretty, if a trifle unkempt, and the birds still sang in the branches of the plum tree. “Blubbit, blubbit, blubbit,” they seemed to be calling, with the occasional “peakle!” shreik.

            “Can’t get the staff to stick around and mow the grass these days,” the thought popped into her head, which reminded her of something else, something a wise man had once said about certain types of gardeners. “Great at planting the seeds, not so reliable about finishing the weeding, though.”

            A loud rumble like approaching thunder roused Liz from her thoughtful reverie. She was hungry. “I wonder if Finnley had the decency to leave some Peasland soup in the freezer?”

            #4066
            ÉricÉric
            Keymaster

              Godfrey kind of liked the silence of late.

              Finnley under the guise of regular taichi practice, had been actually quite busy ushering the randomly scurrying forgotten characters out of the house into the wild, with a broomstick and a mild dose of threat.

              The Splendor Manor had fell pleasantly silent. Too silent for Liz probably, who had started to notice and launch back into gears her creaking storytelling joints.

              #4046
              F LoveF Love
              Participant

                Miss Bossy Pants contemplated her pale and wan appearance in the bathroom mirror. She wondered if she was well enough to turn up at work today.

                Don’t want anyone else to catch anything off me…

                However, It was important they did not lose momentum with the competition out there chomping at their heels.

                “There is too much talking about writing and not enough actual writing,” Bossy grumbled to her reflection while she dealt to the under eye circles with some concealer.

                Of course, that was Hilda to a T; always yabbering on about some stupendous idea for a story but when it came to actually putting pen to paper … well that was quite another matter.

                Connie had started out with some potential but was becoming increasingly aggressive and alienating her leads.

                How many times must I tell her that clenching her fists and refusing to make eye contact makes her appear shifty and untrustworthy? Bossy slammed some lipstick on her mouth with unnecessary force.

                And that new staff member, what’s his name?

                Prout, that’s right.

                Bright enough but a bit of a moaner. Bad for morale all that moaning. As for sweet old Sophie, the temp, she seemed to be losing more and more marbles by the minute.

                #4039
                TracyTracy
                Participant

                  Hilda woke up rubbing her jaw, recalling the odd dream about pulling a splinter of bone out of a hole in her mouth where a molar should have been. There had been a sharp point sticking out of her gum, and she pulled ~ and pulled ~ and the bone shard that appeared in her hand seemed much too big to have come out of her mouth. What does that symbolize, she wondered? She was sure miss bossy behind the scenes pants would have something wittily disparaging to say about the imagery. But then an idea struck her: perhaps it was part of the Polar Molar story that she was connecting to.

                  Hilda had been wanting to join the new Dream Investigation course for reporters, but felt the need to practice first before joining the class. There wasn’t much point in attending with no dream recall at all. Not much point in joining with just the bare bones, so to speak, of a rudimentary isolated snippet of recall either. Perhaps she’d go back to sleep and try to fill in some gaps. If she was late to the office, she could say she’d been following an unexpected lead on the story.

                  #3996
                  TracyTracy
                  Participant

                    The following is an e-mail from the past, composed on July 01, 2010. It is being delivered from the past through FutureMe.org

                    Dear FutureMe,
                    The Absinthe Cafe
                    Dawn and Mark had a bottle of Absinthe (the proper stuff with the WORMwood in
                    it, which is illegal in France) but forgot to bring it. Wandering around at
                    some point, we chanced upon a cafe called Absinthe. Sitting on the terrace, the
                    waitress came up and looked right at me and said “Oh you are booked to come here
                    tomorrow night!” and then said “Forget I said that”. Naturally that got our
                    attention. After we left Dawn spotted a kid with 2016 on the back of his T
                    shirt. We asked Arkandin about it and we have a concurrent group focus that does
                    meet in that cafe in 2016, including Britta. Dawn’s name is Isabelle Spencer,
                    Jib’s is Jennifer….
                    The Worm & The Suitcase
                    I borrowed Rachel’s big red suitcase for the trip and stuck a Time Bridgers
                    sticker on it, and joked before I left about the case disappearing to 2163. I
                    had an impulse to take a fig tree sapling for Eric and Jib, which did survive
                    the trip although it looked a little shocked at first. As Eric was repotting
                    it, we noticed a worm in the soil, and I said, Well, if the fig tree dies at
                    least you have the worm.
                    At Balzacs house on a bench in the garden there was a magazine lying there open
                    to an ad for Spain, which said “If you lose your suitcase it would be the best
                    thing because you would have to stay”.
                    Later we asked Arkandin and he said that there was something from the future
                    inserted into my suitcase. I went all through it wondering what it could be,
                    and then a couple of days ago Eric said that it was the WORM! because of the
                    WORMwood absinthe syncs, and worm hole etc. I just had a chat with Franci who
                    had a big worm sync a couple of days ago, she particularly noticed a very big
                    worm outside the second hand shop, and noted that she hadn’t seen a worm in ages
                    ~ which is also a sync, because there was a big second hand clothes shop next to
                    Dawn and Mark’s hotel that I went into looking for a bowler hat.
                    Arkandin said, by the way, that Jane did forget to mention the bowler hats in
                    OS7, those two guys on the balcony were indeed wearing bowler hats, and that
                    they were the same guys that were in my bedroom in the dream I had prior to
                    finding the Seth stuff ~ Elias and Patel.
                    Eric replied:

                    And another Time Bridger thing; a while ago, Jib and I had fun planting some TB stickers at random places in Paris (and some on a wooden gate at Jib’s hometown).
                    Those in Paris I remember were one at the waiting room of a big tech department store, and another on the huge “Bateaux Mouches” sign on the Pont de l’Alma (bridge, the one of Lady D. where there is a gilded replica of Lady Liberty’s flame).
                    I think there are pics of that on Jib’s or my flickr account somewhere.
                    When we were walking past this spot, Jib suddenly remembered the TB sticker — meanwhile, the sign which was quite clean before had been written all over, and had other stickers everywhere. We wondered whether it was still here, and there it was! It’s been something like 2 years… Kind of amazing to think it’s still there, and imagine all the people that may have seen it since!
                    ~~~~

                    The Flights

                    I wasn’t all that keen on flying and procrastinated for ages about the trip. I
                    flew with EASYjet, so it was nice to see the word EASY everywhere. I got on the
                    plane to find that they don’t allocate seats, and chose a seat right at the
                    front on the left. The head flight attendant was extremely playful for the
                    whole flight, constantly cracking up laughing and teasing the other flight
                    attendants, who would poke him and make him laugh during announcements so that
                    he kept having to put the phone down while he laughed. I spent the whole flight
                    laughing and catching his mischeivously twinking eye.
                    I asked Arkandin about him and he said his energy was superimposed. I got on
                    the flight to come home and was met on the plane by the same guy! I said
                    HELLO! It’s YOU again! Can I sit in the same seat and are you going to make me
                    laugh again” and he actually moved the person that was in my seat and said I
                    could sit there. Then he asked me about my book (about magic and Napolean). He
                    also said that all his flights all week had been delayed except the two that I
                    was on. He wanted to give me a card for frequent flyers but I told him I
                    usually flew without planes ~ that cracked him up ;))
                    ~~~

                    The Dream Bean

                    Eric cracked open a special big African bean that is supposed to enhance
                    dreams/lucidity so we all had a bit of it. The second night I remembered a
                    dream and it was a wonderful one.
                    (Coincidentally, on the flight home I read a few pages of my book and it just
                    happened to be about the council of five dragons and misuse of magical beans)
                    In the dream I had a companion with magical powers, who I presumed was Jib but
                    it was myself actually. It was a long adventure dream of being chased and
                    various adventures across the countryside, but there was no stress, it was all
                    great fun. Everytime things got a bit too close in the dream, I’d hold onto my
                    friend with magical powers, and we would elevate above the “adventure” and drop
                    down in another location out of immediate danger ~ although we were never
                    outside of the adventure, so to speak. At one point I wondered why my magical
                    freind didn’t just elevate us right up high and out of it completely, and
                    realized that we were in the adventure game on purpose for the fun of it, so why
                    would we remove ourselves completely from the adventure game.
                    In the dream I remember we were heading for Holland at one point, and then the
                    last part we were safely heading for Turkey…..
                    The other dream snapshot was “we are all working together on roof tiles” and
                    Arkandin had some interesting stuff to say about that one.
                    ~~~

                    There were alot of vampire imagery incidents starting with me asking Eric if he
                    slept in his garden tool box at night, and then the guy who shot out of a door
                    right next to Jib and Eric’s, in a bright orange T shirt, carrying a cardboard
                    coffin. He stopped for me to take a photo (and Arkandin said it was a Patel pop
                    in); then while walking through the outdoor food market someone was chopping a
                    crate up and a perfect wooden stake flew across the floor and landed at my feet.
                    The next vampire sync was a shop opposite Dawn and Mark’s hotel with 3 coffins
                    in the window (I went back to take a pic of the cello actually, didn’t even
                    notice the coffins). Inside the shop was an EAU DE NIL MOTOR SCOOTER Share, can
                    you beleive it, and a mummy, a stuffed raven, and a row of (Tardis) Red phone
                    boxes.
                    I had a nightmare last night that I couldn’t find any of my (nine) dogs; the
                    only ones I could find were the dead ones.
                    ~~~~

                    Balzac’s House

                    The trip to Balzac’s house was interesting, although in somewhat unexpected
                    ways. (Arkandin was Balzac and I was the cook/housekeeper) The house didn’t
                    seem “right” somehow to Mark and I and we decided that was probably because
                    other than the desk there was no furniture in it. Mark saw a black cat that
                    nobody else saw that was an Arkandin pop in (panther essence animal), and Dawn
                    felt that he was sitting on a chair, and Mark sat on him. (Arkandin said yes he
                    did sit on him ;) The kitchen was being used as an office. Jib felt the house
                    was too small, and picked up on a focus of his that rented the other part of the
                    house. (The house was one storey high on the side we entered, and two storeys
                    high from the road below). There were two pop ins there apparently, one with
                    long hair which is a connection to my friend Joy who was part of that group
                    focus, and I can’t recall anything about the other one. Dawn was picking up
                    that Balzac wasn’t too happy, and I was remembering the part in Cousin Bette
                    that infuriated me when I read it, where he goes on and on about how disgusting
                    it is for servants to expect their wages when their “betters” are in dire
                    straits. Arkandin confirmed that I didn’t get my wages.
                    The garden was enchanting and had a couple of sphinx statues and a dead pigeon ~
                    as well as the magazine with the suitcase and Spain imagery. Mark signed the
                    guest book “brought the cook back” and I replied “no cooking smells this time”.

                    #3978
                    TracyTracy
                    Participant

                      A strange peacefulness enveloped Idle as she stood immobilized beside the sapling. A feeling of imperturbability washed over her, the grace of stillness. She glanced down at her legs and rather liked the smooth cold marble effect; so much more attractive that purple veins and loose skin. While her neck still had a degree of flexibility, she looked around, appreciating the hard still silent trees, their infinite serenity and refreshing lack of hustle bustle.

                      But her quiet reverie was not to last long. The sudden appearance of a partly clad woman sent flocks of birds squalking away from the treetops in alarm.

                      The woman immediately set to removing her shirt and rearranging it across her torso in an attempt to gain some kind of conventional modesty, dislodging the sticky paper scraps.

                      Devan, who had chanced upon this usual scene in his search for his aunt, failed to notice the paper at first, so entranced was he with watching the attractive woman attempt to cover her voluptuous body with a gardening shirt. Mater, breathing heavily from the exertion of the search, came up behind him and slapped him soundly on the back of the head and gave him a push.

                      “The paper!” she hissed. “Get the paper!”

                      #3977
                      TracyTracy
                      Participant

                        HELP ME!” Liz shouted over her shoulder, while simultaneously grabbing the back of the gardeners trousers with one hand, and attempting to floogle the phrase stickum lute putty on her pocket device with the other hand. What in tarnation did it mean? Probably some ancient tribal voodoo Finnley had picked up during her sojourn in the nether regions of the planet.

                        Roberto struggled to escape the vice like grip on his belt, but Liz’s grip was firm. Godfrey charged across the lawn like like a wild boar to assist with the detention of the errant gardener and gripped Roberto’s shoulder firmly. The sticky shreds of paper in Godfrey’s hand stuck to the gardeners denim shirt like glue. Roberto wrenched himself free, sending Godfrey flying into the herbaceous border, and leaving Liz holding an empty pair of jeans in her hand. Focusing on the information now showing on her pocket information device ~ an aboriginal dreamwalker teleport code ~ it was a moment before Liz realized that she was no longer detaining the gardener but merely holding his trousers. Of Roberto, there was no sign.

                        Godfrey, sitting in amongst the delphiniums, was looking as pale as Finnley after the cucumber mask. Although Liz had missed the sight of the gardener sans trews, Godfrey had not.

                        “An imposter!” he cried. “That was no Roberto, that was Roberta Slack! A WOMAN!”

                        #3975
                        F LoveF Love
                        Participant

                          “Don’t push me,” snapped Finnley. “Yes Godfrey, I believe picking up rubbish is in my job description. Your job description … well buggered if I know what you do around here,” she said snarkily, perversely annoyed at being telepathically described as ‘the maid’. “Give me that rubbish immediately and I will deal with it,” she commanded, making a grab for Godfrey’s hand. “You go and help LIz with Roberto. And whatever you do, don’t let the blighter jump 3 times in the air and shout stickum lute putty.

                          “Who are you?” whispered Godfrey, keeping a firm grasp on the scraps of paper, aided perhaps by the fact that the honey was adhering them to his hand. “You are not the Finnley we know and … well, the Finnley we know. Is that cucumber on your face really a disguise? What have you done with Finnley?”

                          “Don’t be ridiculous,” said Finnley, rolling her eyes.

                          “Help!” screamed Liz. “He’s trying to jump!”

                          #3973
                          TracyTracy
                          Participant

                            Aunt Idle wandered around, wondering where everyone was. Had everyone gone out on a day trip or a holiday? Had she forgotten? She clumped across the yard looking for Bert. If she could find Bert, he would know ~ but where was he? Her feet felt dry and heavy. I really must do something about those dry callouses, she thought ~ perhaps a long hot soak in the bath. But first, I must find the others.

                            Idle continued her search, but her legs began to feel like lead. Funny how some days gravity seemed so much stronger. It was becoming harder to put one foot in front of the other. What was it that guy on the internet had said about a lightness of energy? The unbearable lightness of being ~ well this was more like the unbearable heaviness of feet.

                            A pair of butterfly’s scampered through the air, fluttering and darting around Idle’s sticky dreads. Be light like the skipping of a butterfly, that guy had said. Hah! she croaked. Easy to say! Unable to walk any further, Idle grabbed onto a straight little eucalyptus sapling to hold herself up. Her fingers felt stiff and inflexible as she grasped the slender trunk.

                            It’s just too hard, she thought with a heavy heart. It’s too hard to move.

                            #3972
                            F LoveF Love
                            Participant

                              Suddenly there was a piercing scream.

                              Finnley’s face had turned white—although later she would claim it was not fear but rather the cucumber mask giving her face a death-like appearance—and she was pointing a shaking finger in the direction of Roberto’s derrière. Or more accurately, towards where Roberto’s derrière had been prior to the scream; like the others, he had jumped up in alarm at the ear splitting noise.

                              “What the devil is the matter?” gasped LIz. She grasped Finnley’s shoulders firmly and shook her. “Pull yourself together; it’s just a bum crack. I know it is a long time since you will have seen a man’s bum, but really as I keep saying to you, if you will just smarten yourself up and make a bit more effort. I mean, look at you; you’ve got vegetables falling off your face ….” Liz shook her head in confoundment.

                              “It’s not the bum crack,” snarled Finnley, recovering her usual unflappable composure. “It is the tattoo on his bum. The tattoo of the girl with the glass feet. Do you not know what that means?”

                              Roberto’s eyes narrowed as he began to back away towards the gate.

                              In all the excitement, nobody noticed Godfrey picking up the sticky and ripped shreds of paper which Liz had let drop to the ground.

                              Or did they?

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