Carving Wooden Eggs – An Eggposé of The Sexy Wooden Leg

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  • #6498

      Some background information on The Sexy Wooden Leg and potential plot developments.


      (nearby Duckailingtown in Dumbass, Oocrane)
      The Rootians (a fictitious nationality) invaded Oocrane (a fictitious country) under the guise of freeing the Dumbass region from Lazies. They burned crops and buildings, including the home of a man named Dumbass Voldomeer who was known for his wooden leg and carpenter skills. After the war, Voldomeer was hungry and saw a nest of swan eggs. He went back to his home, carved nine wooden eggs, and replaced the real eggs with the wooden ones so he could eat the eggs for food. The swans still appeared to be brooding on their eggs by the end of summer.

      Note: There seem to be a bird thematic at play.
      The swans’ eggs introduce the plot. The mysterious virus is likely a swan flu. Town in Oocrane often have reminiscing tones of birds’ species.
      Bird To(w)nes: (Oocrane/crane, Keav/kea, Spovlar/shoveler, Dilove/dove…)
      Also the town’s nursing home/hotel’s name is Vyriy from a mythical place in Slavic mythology (also Iriy, Vyrai, or Irij) where “birds fly for winter and souls go after death” which is sometimes identified with paradise. It is believed that spring has come to Earth from Vyrai.

      At the Keav Headquarters

      (🗺️ Capital of Oocrane)

      General Rudechenko and Major Myroslava Kovalev are discussing the incapacitation of President Voldomeer who is suffering from a mysterious virus. The President had told Major Kovalev about a man in the Dumbass region who looked similar to him and could be used as a replacement. The Major volunteers to bring the man to the General, but the General fears it is a suicide mission. He grants her permission but orders his aide to ensure she gets lost behind enemy lines.

      Myroslava, the ambitious Major goes undercover as a former war reporter, is now traveling on her own after leaving a group of journalists. She is being followed but tries to lose her pursuers by hunting and making fire in bombed areas. She is frustrated and curses her lack of alcohol.

      The Shrine of the Flovlinden Tree

      (🗺️ Shpovlar, geographical center of Oocrane)

      Olek is the caretaker of the shrine of Saint Edigna and lives near the sacred linden tree. People have been flocking to the shrine due to the miraculous flow of oil from the tree. Olek had retired to this place after a long career, but now a pilgrim family has brought a message of a plan acceleration, which upsets Olek. He reflects on his life and the chaos of people always rushing around and preparing for the wrong things. He thinks about his father’s approach to life, which was carefree and resulted in the same ups and downs as others, but with less suffering. Olek may consider adopting this approach until he can find a way to hide from the enemy.

      Rosa and the Cauldron Maker

      (young Oocranian wiccan travelling to Innsbruck, Austria)

      Eusebius Kazandis is selling black cauldrons at the summer fair of Innsbruck, Austria. He is watching Rosa, a woman selling massage oils, fragrant oils, and polishing oils. Rosa notices Eusebius is sad and thinks he is not where he needs to be. She waves at him, but he looks away as if caught doing something wrong. Rosa is on a journey across Europe, following the wind, and is hoping for a gust to tell her where to go next. However, the branches of the tree she is under remain still.

      The Nursing Home

      (Nearby the town of Dilove, Oocrane, on Roomhen border somewhere in Transcarpetya)

      Egna, who has lived for almost a millennium, initially thinks the recent miracle at the Flovlinden Tree is just another con. She has performed many miracles in her life, but mostly goes unnoticed. She has a book full of records of the lives of many people she has tracked, and reminisces that she has a connection to the President Voldomeer. She decides to go and see the Flovlinden Tree for herself.

      🗺️ (the Vyriy hotel at Dilove, Oocrane, on Roomhen border)

      Ursula, the owner of a hotel on the outskirts of town, is experiencing a surge in business from the increased number of pilgrims visiting the linden tree. She plans to refurbish the hotel to charge more per night and plans to get a business loan from her nephew Boris, the bank manager. However, she must first evict the old residents of the hotel, which she is dreading. To avoid confrontation, she decides to send letters signed by a fake business manager.

      Egbert Gofindlevsky, Olga Herringbonevsky and Obadiah Sproutwinklov are elderly residents of an old hotel turned nursing home who receive a letter informing them that they must leave. Egbert goes to see Obadiah about the letter, but finds a bad odor in his room and decides to see Olga instead.
      Maryechka, Obadiah’s granddaughter, goes back home after getting medicine for her sick mother and finds her home empty. She decides to visit her grandfather and his friends at the old people’s home, since the schools are closed and she’s not interested in online activities.
      Olga and Egbert have a conversation about their current situation and decide to leave the nursing home and visit Rosa, Olga’s distant relative. Maryechka encounters Egbert and Olga on the stairs and overhears them talking about leaving their friends behind. Olga realizes that it is important to hold onto their hearts and have faith in the kindness of strangers. They then go to see Obadiah, with Olga showing a burst of energy and Egbert with a weak smile.

      Thus starts their escape and unfolding adventure on the roads of war-torn Oocrane.

      Character Keyword Characteristics Sentiment
      Egbert old man, sharp tone sad, fragile
      Maryechka Obadiah’s granddaughter, shy innocent
      Olga old woman, knobbly fingers conflicted, determined
      Obadiah stubborn as a mule, old friend of Egbert unyielding, possibly deaf
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    • Author
    • #6499

        Premise is set:

        Olga, Egbert and Obadiah are key protagonists in an adventure of elderly people being evicted / escaping their nursing home of Oocrane (with Maryechka, Obadiah’s grand-daughter, in tow). They start traveling together and helping each other in a war-torn country, and as they travel, they connect with other characters.
        Tone is light-hearted and warm, with at times some bitter-sweet irony, and it unfolds into a surprisingly enthralling saga, with some down-to-earth mysteries, adding up to a satisfying open-ended conclusion that brings some deep life learning about healing the past, accepting the present and living life to its potential.

        A potential plot structure begins to develop henceforth:

        Chapter 2: The Journey Begins

        Departure from the Nursing Home

        Olga and Egbert make their way out the front gate with Obadiah, who has decided to join them on their journey, and they set out on the road together.
        Maryechka, Obadiah’s granddaughter, decides to come along as well out of concern about the elders’, and the group sets off towards an unknown destination.

        A Stop at the Market

        The group stops at a bustling market in the town and begins to gather supplies for their journey.
        Olga and Egbert haggle with vendors over prices, while Obadiah and Maryechka explore the market and gather food for the road.
        The group encounters a strange man selling mysterious trinkets and potions, who tries to sell them a “luck” charm.

        An Unexpected Detour

        The group encounters a roadblock on their path and are forced to take a detour through a dense forest.
        They encounter a group of bandits on the road, who demand their supplies and valuables.
        Olga, Egbert, and Obadiah band together to outwit the bandits and escape, while Maryechka uses her wits to distract them.

        A Close Call with a Wild Beast

        The group comes across a dangerous wild animal on the road, who threatens to attack them.
        Obadiah uses his quick thinking to distract the beast, while Egbert and Olga come up with a plan to trap it.
        Maryechka uses her bravery to lure the beast into a trap, saving the group from certain danger.

        A Night Under the Stars

        The group sets up camp for the night, exhausted from their journey so far.
        They sit around a campfire, sharing stories and reminiscing about their pasts.
        As they gaze up at the stars, they reflect on the challenges they have faced so far and the journey ahead of them. They go to bed, filled with hope and a sense of camaraderie, ready for whatever comes next.


          More developments

          Chapter 3: The Journey becomes more eggciting

          The Flovlinden Tree

          The group reaches the Flovlinden Tree, a massive linden tree in the heart of Oocrane, which is said to be sacred and is attracting crowds of pilgrims.
          They meet Olek, the old caretaker of the tree, who tells them the story of Saint Edigna. He explains how the tree is said to have magical healing properties, and how the tree is responsible for the sacred oil that the pilgrims come to collect.
          However, Olek reveals that the secret of Saint Edigna is not what it seems. Edna, an old woman who has been living far from the crowd for thousands of years, is actually Saint Edigna.
          Olek shares that Edna has been living in solitude for very long. He tells the group that if they want to learn more about the sacred tree and Edna, they must travel to her hidden home.
          The four friends were shocked to hear that Edna was still alive and wanted to meet her. They asked Olek for directions, and he gave them a map that showed the way to Edna’s remote dwelling.
          They bid farewell to Olek and set off on their journey to find Edna.

          A Run-In with Myroslava

          The group comes across a former war reporter, Myroslava, who is traveling on her own after leaving a group of journalists. She is being followed by mysterious individuals and is trying to lose them by hunting and making fire in bombed areas.
          Myroslava is frustrated and curses her lack of alcohol, wishing she could find a place to escape from her pursuers.
          The group approaches Myroslava and offers to help her. She joins forces with them and together, they set off on their journey.
          As they travel, Myroslava shares her experiences as a war reporter, and the group listens in awe. She explains how she has seen the worst of humanity, but also the best, and how it has changed her as a person.
          Myroslava and the group continue their journey, with the former reporter becoming more and more determined to shake off her pursuers and continue on her own.

          A Visit with Eusebius Kazandis’ Relatives

          The group reaches a small village where they are expected by relatives of Eusebius Kazandis, the cauldron seller that Rose has met at the Innsbruck fair.
          The relatives tell the group about Kazandis and his business, and how he has been traveling the world, selling his wares. They explain how he has become a legend in their village, and how proud they are of him.
          The group learns about Kazandis’ passion for cooking and how he uses his cauldrons to create delicious meals for his customers. They are also shown his secret recipe book, which has been passed down for generations.
          The relatives invite the group to try some of Kazandis’ famous dishes, and they are blown away by the delicious flavors.
          The group thanks the relatives for their hospitality and sets off on their journey, with a newfound appreciation for Kazandis and his love of cooking.

          A Surprising Encounter with Edna

          The group finally reaches Edna’s hidden home, a small cottage in the middle of a dense forest.
          As they approach the cottage, they are surprised to see Edna, who is actually the legendary Saint Edigna, standing outside, waiting for them.

          The four friends have finally arrived at Edna’s dwelling, where they learned about her vast knowledge of the families connected to her descendants. Edna showed them her books, and they were amazed to find that their own family was listed among her descendants. They were even more shocked to learn that they were related to President Voldomeer Zumbasky and Dumbass Voldomeer, who was said to be a distant relative and carpenter who made the President’s wooden leg. It was rumored that they shared a common ancestor, but in reality, they were possibly secret twins.

          The Secret of Dumbass Voldomeer

          The four friends were determined to find out more about Dumbass Voldomeer and his connection to their family. They learned that he lived in the small city of Duckailingtown in Dumbass, near the Rootian border. They also discovered that Dumbass Voldomeer had been enrolled to take the place of the President, who had succumbed from a mysterious swan flu virus, to which Dumbass Voldomeer was immune. As they set to Duckailingtown, they couldn’t help but wonder what other secrets and surprises lay ahead for them on this incredible journey.


            Potential situations and complications:

            • While searching for Dumbass Voldomeer, they stumble upon a group of political protesters who are demanding the resignation of the President.
            • Dumbass Voldomeer mistakenly takes Maryechka and her friends for secret agents sent to spy on him and tries to escape.
            • The group is treated to a unique performance by the local swan-dancing troupe, who are trying to raise awareness about the mysterious swan flu virus.
            • Dumbass Voldomeer invites the group to his workshop and shows them his latest creations, including a wooden replica of the Eiffel Tower.
            • While looking through the books of families connected to Egna, they find a page with a recipe for a special cocktail that supposedly grants immortality.
            • Maryechka and her friends come across a black market for wooden legs, where they meet a man who claims to have the original wooden leg made by Dumbass Voldomeer for the President.

              Chapter 4: There is no place like home

              A Visit to Duckailingtown

              The group arrives in the small city of Duckailingtown, known for its unusual name and the legendary wooden leg carpenter, Dumbass Voldomeer.
              Maryechka, is shown by Liliya and Lina the local museum where they learn about the famous wooden leg carpenter and the swan flu outbreak that left the President incapacitated.
              The group visits the workshop of Dumbass Voldomeer and they are shocked to find that he is the spitting image of the President.
              Dumbass Voldomeer tells them about his connection to the President and how he was approached to take his place as the President.
              The group learns about the Rootian border and the close relationship between Rootia and Dumbass, and the possibility of a future cross-border conflict.
              The group visits the swan sanctuary and learns about the mysterious swan flu virus that has affected the President and the citizens of Dumbass.
              The group makes a decision to continue their journey to Rootia to find a cure for the swan flu and save the President.

              Cross-border Conflict

              The group crosses the Rootian border and finds themselves in the midst of a conflict between Rootia and Dumbass.
              They meet with a Rootian diplomat who explains the conflict and the role of the President in resolving it.
              The group encounters Myroslava who is still being pursued by her pursuers and they team up to find a cure for the swan flu.
              They visit the Rootian medical facility where they meet with the chief medical officer who explains the research being done on the swan flu virus.
              The group travels to a remote location where they meet with Olek, the caretaker of the Flovlinden Tree, and learns about the sacred oil that is believed to have healing properties.
              The group collects the sacred oil and returns to the medical facility where they successfully cure the President and put an end to the conflict between Rootia and Dumbass.
              The group returns home, proud of their accomplishment and the newfound knowledge and experiences they have gained on their journey.

              A Homecoming Celebration

              The group returns home and is greeted with open arms by their families and friends.
              Maryechka, Liliya, and Lina visit Egna who is thrilled to hear about their journey and the success of their mission.
              The group shares their experiences and knowledge with their friends and families, and they all celebrate their homecoming together.
              Dumbass Voldomeer visits the group and thanks them for their help in resolving the conflict between Rootia and Dumbass.
              The group visits the Flovlinden Tree and pays homage to Olek and the sacred oil that played a critical role in their journey.
              Maryechka, Liliya, and Lina reflect on their journey and the life-long friendships they have formed.
              The group concludes their journey and looks forward to their future adventures and discoveries.

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