Search Results for 'al'

“Nice cuppa, Norm, what kind is it? Doesn’t taste like Typhoo” asked Sue.

“Oh, it’s a herbal one I think, let me see” said Norm, rummaging in the bin for the wrapper. “Never seem to get a cup of ordinary tea these days, it’s all herbal stuff. Here it is: Siberian Watermelon and Mushroom”.

“Tastes quite nice” replied Sue, holding her cup out for a refill.

“Watermelon produces an effect similar to that of Viagra, researchers say. A slice of juicy watermelon contains citrulline that can trigger the production of a substance that relaxes the body’s blood vessels. A similar effect is produced when a man takes a Viagra pill.”

“Well, that might explain a few things” thought Becky.

“However, the vegetable is not so organ-specific as Viagra…..”

“Hmm, I wonder if that would explain the butler’s preposterous breasts ?”

“Fancy a cuppa, Sue?” Norm asked.

Sue Flay accepted gratefully. “Yeah, Norm, a cuppa sounds nice”. What a day it had been.

“Mad bunch of nutters, this lot, eh?” Norm smiled ruefully.

“I should say so!” replied Sue. “Are all movie people as wacky as this?”

It was Sue Flay’s first venture into movies, although she was already famous as the singer with the Ova Tones, the popular all girl band.

“No, they’re not” replied Norm. “Frankly, no, they are not this mad usually. This is a decidedly odd bunch, if you ask me”.

“Oooh” said Sue, momentarily speechless. “Hhmmmm”.

Norm Al Ladd, christened Norman Allan Ladd, was seriously beginning to wonder what kind of production he had signed himself up with. Never in his career as a P movie actor had me met such an odd cast.

She put her tutu back on her generous breast and looked around her at all those naked actors…
She was weary of this life as a porn star. Her wig, she won’t loose her again, her blond wig…
When she was young she was a cootch dancer, and it wasn’t really much better but at least her father could protect her.
Now she was alone, facing all those brutes.

Rosemary, who played the role of Finnley as a woman, just slapped Norm in the face.
You butcher! you scratched my nipples… you have no manners, really!

He laughed carelessly and her impression of him as a stupid lad just deepened.

“But where is PHLYNN, Rudiah, for god’s sake, he is supposed to be here. You don’t think maybe he’s a double agent do you?” Finnley whispered tersely. “And more to the point, where’s the bloody watermelon?”

“SSHHHHH!!” Rudiah elbowed him painfully in the ribs. “Lady T’Egg!” She pointed towards the door which had swung open, revealing Lady Theresa Eagleston. She looked furious.

Lady Theresa was aghast, she had always thought Finnley was a man, and his rudeness was excusable… but now…

Well, I think you just got your answer, Becky, she said to herself, as she read the recent additions. Blimey O Riley! Where to go from here, I wonder? I think it might be best, she surmised, to continue with Hector hallucinating. After all, that will explain any bizarre eventuality.

She put her hands on his balls, and her hungry look said more to him to any love whispers he had ever heard before.
“I love your 2 big pink balls”.

Noise in the corridor.
Finnley looked suddenly afraid.
“Lady Theresa’s coming”…
They fumbled upon each other, trying to get back their clothes but could only half do it before she entered the library.
She gasped at the scene before her eyes.
“Finnley! what on earth?..”

Felicity was the middlename of Finnley, and she was quite joyful actually…

Finnley’s wig had fallen over the carpet, and actually she was bald. Her false eyebrows had fallen also and revealed a neat and gracious line of feminine eyebrow.

— You’re a far better catch Finnley than I could have hoped for with Lady Theresa… I don’t regret our encounter in the library.

He was titillating her nipples thoughtlessly and pinching them at times triggering an expression of pleasure on Finnley’s face.
She was beautiful after… well, what they did.

“Get you hands off my bosoms, you cheeky blighter!” exclaimed Felicity, the downstairs maid.

The drugs that she had added to Sir Coon’s tea were evidently starting to take effect. He was hallucinating.

Hector suddenly felt outside of his body and became only a spectator of his own life.
It was like he was a master in karate (whatever that was) and he took care of Finnley in the library in no time.

He realized Finnley had a real breast, and quite generous… A surge of adrenaline overflowed his mind and all he remembered after that was the feeling of the carpet on his naked knees and the generous forms of Finnleys in his hands.

“Damn it, where’s Phlynn!” Finnley muttered under his breath. “Plan 57 isn’t bloody working! We won’t be able to lure Sir Coon into the library now with the promise of a little clandestine titilation, we will have to use force. But I can’t do it alone! Where is PHLYNN?!”

“That sinister Finnley had plans to do away with Sir Hector, in the library, before dinner.”

“Perhaps I should amend that entry”, Becky mused.

“What’s that you said, Sugar Plum?” asked Gayesh, nuzzling her ear.

“Oh bugger off, Gayesh, can’t you see I’m busy?” Becky snapped, moving her chair away from the amourous doctor. “I have to attend to this before it all gets changed. Now shut up and back off.”

The unflappable Gayesh smiled, and poured the powdery contents of a vial into her drink, and waited.

Phlynn was late. “You just can’t get the staff these days” grumbled T’Eggy. Where was the dratted man? All she wanted was a quick leg-over before dinner, and now that Hector wasn’t coming after all, she could have spent more time with Phlynn.

Unbeknownst to T’Eggy, Phylnn was in the stables, struggling into his pistachio green jewel studded sari. He was late for the rendezvous in the library, and in his haste to don the disguise of a sultry voluptuous sultana, the endless yards of fabric wrapped around his long legs in a hopeless tangle.